I don’t like spanking *

* There is an explanation to this title. We’ve talked about how everyone in the TTWD  family is so very different. There are as many ways to do TTWD (this thing we do, basically spanking and such – for the newcomers) as there are people doing it. When Nick and I participate I’d say we’re pretty near the middle of the scale. I see the scale going from those who do a little light spanking during sex to heavy full on BDSM and everything that it can imply.

 

So after thinking about spanking all my life and writing a blog about it for over fourteen years, why on earth would I say I don’t like spanking? 

Because I don’t.

But let me tell you what I do like. I like the feeling of anticipation before a spanking. That sizzling butterfly feeling. The sexy emails we often send back and forth. A well worded ‘threat’ can enflame me.The wondering – is this going to be a light play session, a hard stress buster, a you will listen to me or an all-out rump roasting that you know you fully deserve.

 

I like wondering what he going to use? His hand, the light leather paddle, the heavy leather paddle, the wood paddle, the flogger or the cane (yikes!)

 

I like the fact that when he takes me to the bedroom I know that for the duration of our next little while I will be the sole focus of his attention. We will both be concentrating on one another and the rest of the world can go jump for a while. Not to mention the great sex that usually follows the spanking!

 

Then comes the spanking itself. Warm-ups are nice, tingling and stinging just enough to bring a rush of blood to some very interesting places. But then it steps up. Now I know that there are many out here who truly enjoy pain, hats off to you for knowing yourselves well. But that’s not me and I say that a firm wooden paddle, or a thick leather strap struck sharply against your ass HURTS! And when it’s repeated over and over it HURTS WORSE! I don’t like this!

 

My mind goes into a frenzy begging silently, Please stop! I can’t take anymore!  Only to be followed immediately by, Wait, is that all? when it’s over.

 

I forgot to mention one of Nick’s questions the other day and it was an important one too. During our in-spanking talk (as Windy called it) he asked if I ever dreamed of being sore or really feeling it the next day. Short answer – 

 

Oh, hell YES!

 

If I liked the anticipation before a spanking, I love the after effects. Any pain we can take with us from the spanking is proof – a continuing reminder of how much we’re loved. That my guy took time away from yard work, golf or watching sports to make TTWD real, to do something he knows I need in my life to keep me happy and balanced. He’s the only one who can do this for me. For me it’s proof of his love and caring. It may be the after-pain that I love the most about TTWD.

 

‘Feeling it the next day’ sound reasonable in books. But in truth, it’s only happened for me twice in all these years. I had a few stray bruises and sore spots the first time he used his belt. I grinned more the next day than I normally would in a week.

 

Which brings me to the one and only good thing about a cane. Besides giving the immediate white-hot, nearly unbearable pain of the stroke, it does give a lasting effect. These feeling of these tiny thin lines can linger. Marks, which can be seen and enjoyed for days are common. For me, these are the only reasons I haven’t given a hard no to the cane.

 

In conclusion I’ll quote Cassie, “I’m perfectly happy with a husband who spanks. I love our lifestyle and I wouldn’t change it. The only time I don’t like our lifestyle is when he is actually spanking. During those moments I’m dead set against it. But in the big picture that’s  very small amount of time.”