I have been a wife and mother for over twenty years. Now I am becoming my husband's lover, too.
We owe it all to my fellow bloggers who gave me the courage to come out to my husband as a spanko.
I do feel like this is a New Beginning for us.

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Friday, January 31, 2020

Fantasy Friday Revival - Playing games

I always want to tell you how good a Fantasy Friday is, but since I wrote this one, I'll just let you decide for yourselves.  I hope you enjoy...

Playing game

All of this started with one stupid phone call from the husband of a friend.

At the time all I could think of was “Why didn’t he just mind his own business and stay out of mine?”

“Kevin called,” Byron informed me as I came in the house. “Why didn’t you tell me that you and Hannah got wasted and then you rode home with her in that condition?”

“Oh for Pete’s sake,” I snapped. “Kevin is a big mouth. Nothing happened, we’re fine. Just drop it.”

“You go out drinking and you ride home with someone who was drunk at the time and you want me to drop it. I’m going to blister your butt!”

I was stunned at this statement. We had been spanking for several months, but it was all in fun. We had made up some rule I was to follow. Mostly silly things, but I knew Byron didn’t really take it seriously. I couldn’t believe he was saying this. I wasn’t in the mood to go along.

“Just stop it,” I told him firmly. “I am in no mood to play tonight. I’m going to bed.”

“So in spite of everything you’ve been saying about me being HOH and how you want discipline in your life you are the one who sees all this as a game. You even wrote all the ‘rules’ you are suppose to go by. Well I've been doing some thinking myself.”

Susan was surprised to see that Byron looked dead serious. He went on, “I am the head of this house and tonight you are going to realize that fact. I don’t plan to run your life. But when you act this crazy and put your life as risk then I am going to have something to say.”

I wasn’t going to listen to any more of this and went to the bedroom and shut the door. That is my signal that I want to be alone and I was pissed when Byron followed me.

“Susan this is going to happen but first you are going to stand in the corner and think about why you felt in necessary to put you life in danger.”

“Are you out of your MIND? I am NOT standing in any corner! That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard of! You can forget it! It is NOT going to happen!”

Byron was much too calm when he said “Actually honey, it is.” Before I even realized what was happening he had pulled me over his knee and held me. That wasn’t easy because I was mad as hell and I was fighting him hard. I felt him reach over to his night stand and grab the hairbrush and quickly began spanking me fast and hard. Never had he spanked like this. It hurt like hell!

I kept yelling, “Stop Byron! That really hurts!” Always in the past that would have ended the spanking, but he was acting like he couldn’t even hear me. When he let me up I couldn’t stop rubbing.

“Damn it,” I snapped, “that hurt! What the hell's the matter with you?”

“You always tell me a spanking is supposed to hurt, so I guess I am doing something right. Now you are going to the corner.”

I was about to continue my protest but I needed time to think and at this moment the corner seem as good a place as any. Fine, whatever. I thought to myself as I stomped over. I was still stunned by this whole confrontation. But not as much as I was when Byron’s next words were,

“Pants down, panties too.”

I exploded! “You have lost your fucking mind!” I screamed at him. Big mistake. He grabbed me around the waist and with one arm yanked down my sweats and panties. Then without a word he once again sailed into my sore ass with the brush.

It was at this late point in the confrontation that I realized, for the first time, that I really wasn’t in control. I had pretended before that he was in control but it had never really been true. I knew I had always had the power to stop anything I didn’t want.

With one last smack that sounded like a gun shot he said sternly, “Not one more word and don’t move one inch out of that corner.”

My head was spinning, my ass was throbbing and my mind was racing. What had set him off, what was going on? I couldn’t believe all this had started because I had ridden a few miles with Hannah when she was a bit tipsy. But then the thought occurred to me – what if one of the boys had done that? Hadn’t I warned them both a million times? What if Byron had put himself it that kind of danger? The seriousness of what I had actually done began to hit home.

I had probably been there about fifteen minutes when Byron returned. He called me over to him. “Have you had time to realize what you did, what could have happened, how devastated the boys and I would have been if something had happened to you? Do you know what you risked?”

I did know, I really did. “Byron, I'm so sorry. Never ever will I do anything so stupid again. I really do know how serious it was.”

“That’s good honey. And in a minute you are going to realize how serious I think it was.”

“But, but… you just spanked me! What do you mean?”

“Susan I spanked you for not going to the corner when I told you to. Now you are going to see how I feel about you riding with drunks!”

With that I was over the end of the bed and my ass was on fire again with the first stroke of his belt. I knew I couldn’t take much more. My safe word played around in my head but as much as I wanted it to stop I just couldn’t say it. The belt felt like it was searing my butt each time it landed. But at this time, for this offense I knew it was not a game we were playing and I wouldn’t say the safe word. My hands were dug into the bedclothes as if I were holding on for dear life.

Finally it stopped. I lay there sobbing as Byron gathered me in his arms and held me. He whispered quietly in my ear how much he loved me and how important I was to him. He had me roll over and very gently rubbed lotion on my burning bottom and thighs. I was amazed that anything could feel so good and hurt so much at the same time.

I slept then. When I woke I did so slowly. Shifting position I winced and clarity came to my mind. Byron was lying beside me.

“How you doing?” he asked.

I smiled back “I’m good,” I answered. And I was, I was as good as I had ever been. I couldn’t believe that Byron had really cared enough to take charge as he had. I was still stunned.

“Okay so from now on,” he grinned, “how about we keep this spanking thing fun and erotic because other wise you are going to realize that this time I took it easy on you. The next time I might have to spank you hard.”

You never know where a simple Fantasy Friday story might lead.  My Cal's Law series began as a Fantasy Friday story. Now it's a  four books from that one story so far. So why don't you try for that one story? Send them to elisspeaks@yahoo.com

Tuesday, January 28, 2020

A Mixed Meme from Ronnie

A Mixed Meme, thanks Ronnie!

Who would you like to see in concert? 
I don’t like concerts because I don’t like crowds. But in a small venue I’d love to see Paul McCartney, Dolly, Cher, Willie Nelson, Taylor Swift

Have you ever had to pull over on the side of the road to be sick?
Not as a driver. But my folks had to pull over a lot for me as a small, car-sick child.

How do you like your steak cooked? 
Medium rare will do for me.

Does anyone have naughty pictures of you? 
Nick has a few. They’re only slightly naughty. We took them when we were dating or just after we were married. I wish now we’d taken more.

Favorite spanking implement.
I don’t know if I have one right now. Maybe the doggin’ bat.

Your least favorite spanking implement?
Definitely the cane.

Do you like having your picture taken?
I don’t much care. It’s usual only my kids that want pictures and if they want them I guess it’s okay.

Do you have any strange phobias?
I don’t like stairs with no backs. I hate spiral staircases and walking over grates. This makes it hard to walk in NYC.

If you could meet a famous person who would it be?

I’d like to meet Robin Roberts.

What do you sleep in?
Just Nick’s arms, nothing else.

What’s the worst place you’ve ever been to? 
I went with my friend to the beach when I was about thirteen. Her parents chose not to make reservations for the 4th of July weekend and we ended up in a horribly nasty little hotel. When we went back the next year it had been torn down.

What is one best decision you’ve made in your life so far?
To retire!

Have you ever smoked pot?  How old were you the first time?  Do you still enjoy?

A few days after my 18 birthday. It was not a good experience. I tried it again when I was in my mid-twenties. That’s my total experience with pot.

Favorite hobby?


Friday, January 24, 2020

Fantasy Friday - Another World, part two

You have a treat today - A brand new Fantasy Friday. This story comes from Adrienne. She has written for us before and you can find her first story of this world here
This is what she had by way of introduction last year. 

My name is Adrienne. I've been married to my hubby Jeremiah for almost 10 years.  We have two sweet kiddos.  I've had a variety of professions, but right now I'm a teacher at my kids' school.  I've loved Sci-Fi since the first time I watched a re-run of Star Trek (the original) years ago.  I'm also a spanko.  To me it seemed only natural to combine the two into a story.  This one's been chasing around my head for quite a while.  I know you might not be "into" Sci-Fi, but maybe you can derive a bit of satisfaction from the story anyway.  :)  Thanks for reading.

I think you're going to enjoy this world

Another World, part two

The horseback ride and picnic had been amazing, and Princess Angelica was feeling as happy as she could ever remember being since she'd come to Sentia nearly three years before.  "We've been here awhile.  Should we get going?"  Allie asked.
"Not yet, Curls."  Prince Phillip answered, repeating her newly-minted nickname.  "We've got something we need to discuss."  Phillip looked almost apologetic.
"What's that?"  Allie began to get a bad feeling.  Had Phillip changed his mind about the truce--or their marriage--or both?
Phillip maneuvered on the picnic blanket so that the two were sitting cross-legged across from one another.  He reached for her hands and held them for a moment.  He took a deep breath, looked straight into her hazel eyes that looked blue against her cornflower blue dress, and tried desperately not to be distracted. "The other day when we spoke about our future, you were very disrespectful.  I understand what you were trying to do, but the way you did it was not acceptable."  
"I don't understand."  
Phillip was pretty sure she did understand, but he explained anyway.  "Your actions were well-intentioned, and I think the promises we've made will help us both make this marriage what it needs to be.  But, your attitude was wrong and your tone of voice was downright insolent.  What do you have to say for yourself, Curls?"
Allie saw where this was going.  Phillip was not at all angry, and he was asking for her side of the story.  She was on a fast train to step 3, punishment.  Ugh.  She didn't have any defense.  Not really.  "I really didn't think you would listen to me otherwise," she said quietly.
"So that makes it right?"
"Please address me as sir when we discuss punishment."  Phillip was stern, though still not angry.
"Yes, sir."  Allie whispered without looking at him.  Phillip stood, helped her up, and led her a few yards away to a tree stump that she had not noticed before.  He sat on the tree stump and pulled her down to sit on his lap.  "I was planning to spank you this afternoon, but then I wondered if you would rather wait.  I know riding back home on a horse after a spanking would not be comfortable.  So, if you would rather, we can wait until tomorrow morning."
Allie wanted to opt out entirely, but knew that wasn't going to happen.  She thought for just a moment, then answered him softly, "Thank you, Phillip, I mean, sir, for giving me the choice.  I don't want to ride on a sore bottom, but waiting is worse.  I'd prefer to go ahead and get the spanking done now, please."
Phillip kissed her forehead and nodded.  "Stand up and hand me your panties.  Then, lie across my lap."  Allie's eyes flicked to the bodyguards across the meadow.  Phillip noticed.  "Don't think about them, Allie.  Just focus on me." Allie nodded silently, but didn't know how easy it would be to ignore the two big men.  She then tried to pull off her cotton panties without raising her knee-length dress any higher than necessary.  She handed Phillip the large, unattractive panties, and blushed furiously over having been caught in such undergarments. Phillip pocketed the panties, then guided her to his left side.  It flashed through Allie's brain that she had never realized that he was left-handed.  A second later, he was helping her across his knees.  Out of habit, Allie reached back and flipped her skirt out of his way before putting both palms on the ground.  Watching her, Phillip raised an eyebrow.  He had not yet decided whether to begin spanking over her clothes or bare her immediately, but he was not about to argue.  
Belatedly, she realized her mistake.  "I'm sorry, sir, was that wrong? My father always said that naughty girls must be punished on the bare bottom, but I didn't mean to do something I shouldn't."  Her fiance was about to spank her for the first time and here she was trying to control things already.  
Phillip placed his hand on her bottom.  "Shh.  It's ok. Just relax."  
"Relax??"  She thought incredulously.  "I'm in the middle of nowhere with an audience of two bodyguards about to watch my bottom get roasted by my fiance.  How am I supposed to relax?" At least the fact that her hair hung down across her face gave her the luxury of not having to see the guards looking at her. 
Phillip looked down at the pretty bottom beneath his hand and cursed under his breath.  The bruises from her encounter with his father had not yet faded.  He hated to spank her while she was still bruised, but there was no going back now.  He raised his hand and brought it down on first one cheek, then the other, until the skin all over her bottom had turned the color of ripe cherries.  Allie knew this was a punishment, but so far, Phillip's ministrations had felt quite nice, and her skin was warming and tingling pleasantly. 
"All right, Angelica, stand up, lean over, and place your hands on the stump."  She obeyed, and he stood staring at her lovely rump, wishing he could do something more fun than punishing it.  He shook himself, and reminded himself of the job at hand, but he knew that he wouldn't be punishing her very often before the wedding . . . at least not if he wanted to keep her virginity intact. 
Behind her, Angelica heard the unmistakable sounds of a jingling buckle and leather being pulled out of belt loops.  She shivered.  Then, the first telling whistle sliced through the air and she braced herself, but the spank was weak and lopsided.  It didn't hurt at all.  She heard the whistle a second time and wasn't worried, but this time the spank was so powerful she nearly lost her balance and fell across the stump.  She cursed loudly.
"Watch your language, little girl, or I'll soap your mouth."  Phillip lined up to try again.  So far, he wasn't doing so well at this.  He tried to make the third strike less powerful than the last, but more effective than the first.  He brought his arm down and the belt made a satisfying slapping sound across Allie's bottom that left a slight red line.  Perfect. 
The next lick was slappy and stingy and brought tears to Allie's eyes.  Four more just like it fell across her bottom causing her to yelp and waggle her bottom.  
She again heard Phillip's voice behind her, "Hold still, young lady." 
Instantly she stilled her wiggling bottom, waiting for the next stroke. Instead there came six in quick succession, whack, crack, crack, slap, crack, crack!  "Oww! ow ow ow ow!!!"  Again the belt fell, this time catching her just underneath the curve of her bottom where the thigh connects to the buttocks.  She went up on her tiptoes with a loud yelp.  Phillip's right hand pushed her back down while his left continued the assault on her upper thighs.  Allie's breath caught in her throat as Phillip lit up her back end.  She began to wail loudly, no longer caring who could hear her.  Then, the assault stopped.  Allie wondered if her punishment were done, but such was not the case. 
"Don't move, Angelica.  I will be right back." Phillip warned.  Allie wondered what he could be doing.  She heard his boots crunch across the ground and then back again toward her.  In an instant, she had her answer.  A small wooden implement crashed against her right buttock and then her left, earning a grunt from Allie each time as she tried to keep her balance. 
 "Too hard," Phillip deduced from her reaction.  When he swung again, he hit the sweet spot.  Allie screeched but did not pitch forward or grunt.  He tried to replicate the swing.  Allie felt the hard wood crack against her bottom and she gasped.  The next swing brought tears rushing again to her eyes.  As the wood fell again and again the pain began to build, and Allie grabbed at the stump, fighting her impulse to run away.  It took all of her strength to simply accept the next swing and the next.  On about the eleventh or twelfth swing, she broke down and began to cry, screaming, ugly cries.  She clawed at the stump.  Phillip kept swinging, first at the right cheek then at the left, over and over again until something began to change. Phillip realized that Allie was no longer howling, but instead she had begun to weep quietly.  
Since he had turned ten years old, Phillip had watched every punishment session his father had given his mother.  His father had often told him that a man has never gotten through to a woman until she cried quietly.  After his mother would begin to weep softly, his father would tell her that he was going to give her the last five spanks.  Phillip had noticed that those last five spanks were always the hardest blows of the entire session.  Phillip followed his father's example.  "Allie, we are almost done.  I'm going to give you the last five spanks now."  Phillip raised the hairbrush and brought it crashing down extremely hard on the tender flesh at the crease between her bottom and her thighs.  Other than a slight bump in volume, Allie did not react to the spank.  She stood, slumped over the stump, waiting, all her fight drained out of her.  When Phillip brought the brush down again onto the other sit spot, pain exploded through her bottom and thigh, but she had no strength left to react.  Again the brush punished first the right side then the left and Allie nearly choked on a sob.  
Phillip was in a quandary.  He had already spanked each side twice.  Where was he supposed to land the last spank?  He mentally noted that next time he would have to promise an even rather than an odd number of concluding blows.  Allie stood crying softly and waiting patiently for the conclusion of her punishment.  Phillip's heart broke a little and he nearly decided not to land the last spank at all, but quickly rejected the notion.  If his father had taught him anything, it was to keep his promises.  Finally, Phillip decided just to land the last spank on the right hand side.  He mentally apologized to the left for his lack of fair treatment, and cracked the brush into Allie's waiting bottom once more.  After the last spank landed, Allie sagged.  Phillip dropped the brush, caught her, and turned her around in his arms.  He pushed the disheveled curls away and kissed her tear-streaked face.  She put her arms around him and sobbed, "I'm sorry, Phillip, that I was mouthy."  
Phillip struggled to understand her words.  He caught, "Sorry Phillip," and that was enough.  "It's ok now, Allie.  It's all over.  You were such a good girl."  He held her and stroked her hair, crooning to her and shushing her.  When she had calmed down a bit, he gave her a cup of water and her panties.  "You might want to put those back on before we go home," he said, smiling.
While Allie collected herself, Phillip took their horses to the river for a drink, then packed their gear.  He folded the picnic blanket in quarters and set it on top of her saddle as a bit of cushion.  He could hardly stand the thought of being away from her after her spanking.  He hadn't realized what spanking her would do to him.  "Oh, yeah, I'm definitely going to have to avoid spanking her before the wedding," he muttered miserably.  On a whim, he put all the gear on his animal, attached its reins to the other, then mounted behind her saddle.  She immediately snuggled back against him, and he took the reins from her.  He clucked to the horses, and they headed for home.  Planet politics could wait for another day.  For now, they had each other, and that was enough.


There is more to the story! Thank you Adrienne! I hope you will send more stories as you get them ready. I hope more of you are out there writing for us. Send any stories to elisspeaks@yahoo.com

Thursday, January 23, 2020

Why would anyone chose to have a Domestic Discipline relationship? Part two.

I’m trying to answer some common questions vanillas have for us spankos. 

Everyone will have their own answers, of course, but since some of these questions can really annoy me I thought I’d come here to share how I’d try to answer them if I could. This is my second post on the subject, you can click here for the first one.

For those fairly new TTWD stands for This Thing We Do (spanking and all it involves.) 

Are there pre-arranged signals for safety sake, such as when the spanker is going too far?  Or is a concern about “going too far” considered contrary to the practice and mind-set of spanking? Does light or playful spanking ever turn dangerous? 

Yes, definitely, there are safe guards! This is especially true in the beginning. All spanko know the concept of a ‘safe word.’ However, I’ve found that most women who have asked for this type of relationship are more likely to asks for harder and longer, rather than for him to ease up or stop. Many use the basic ‘red, yellow.’ When red or any safe word is used all activities stop immediately. Yellow means, ‘I don’t want you to stop, but ease up a little.’ Remember, the in the consensual spanking world the ides of trust is everything. The spanker is usually more cautious than the spankee that things not go too far.

Is spanking more pleasurable nude, or with a thin covering?

Each layer of clothing adds its own dimension. Over jeans, over panties, in the nude, all can be fun. Often it depends on the mood.

Do women really want to be spanked? 

I'm guessing some people might not really want to believe this. But I'm guessing most of you have heard of women having rape fantasies. You have to know that no woman wants to be forced. I'm not talking about the bullshit I've heard from some government officially who talk about 'legitimate rape' as if there was such a thing. I'm talking about a 'rape fantasy' done between two consenting adults who know and trust one another and have chosen to participate in this activity. 

I believe for fantasies 'rape' is what Rhett did to Scarlet when he carried her up the stairs that night - and the smile on her face the next morning was all part of the package.

Something else to point out. Many in my age range were raised by mothers who were fairly sexually repressed because of how they were raised. Some of us absorbed the 'sex is something women must endure to have children' by osmosis. Intellectually, we know that's wrong and women are free to enjoy sex in any way we can. But those gut beliefs are hard to overcome. Part of TTWD has us being overpowered, dominated - that little voice we don't even realize is in our heads can release its subtle hold on us. Since he's the one in charge, we just have to go along and are free to enjoy. And once again I want to point out this is happing in a consensual relationship.

What do you say to others who find that the lifestyle glorifies violence? Isn’t there an inherent contradiction between a mother who wouldn’t dream of spanking her child, but finds pleasure in being spanked herself?

In our spanko world spanking is an activity of complete mutual consent between adults. There is no violence in it. It’s usually part of a sexual relationship practiced and enjoyed by adults. I’d never give a young child a glass of wine, but I can certainly relax and enjoy one.

Why do you think you need this in your life? How a person might find or know that spanking is related to pleasure- and how to engage partner in that so that both are enjoying it.  Does the desire to be spanked result from childhood spankings, or do you think of it as more a forbidden desire to break a few taboos?

This is probably the best and most difficult to answer question of all. And my answer is a definite – I don’t know. I do know it was a desire that I was born with. Spanking has always fascinated me. I was occasionally spanked as a child, not harshly, but it was a normal part of childhood as I grew up. I hated it and took NO pleasure in it. 

But the fantasy was there. I can tell you upon seeing the first scene which ‘I Love Lucy’ shows contained spanking. Same for the Little Rascals and a few other shows of that era. Yet even at the early age of four or five I knew it was ‘wrong’ or ‘strange’ and I knew this desire should be kept as a deep dark secret. I don’t know how I knew this, but I did.

As puberty approached it became sexual. Other girls dreamed of the handsome boy grabbing her and kissing her soundly, where I dreamed of him putting me over his knee – kissing to come later. But still I shared these thoughts with no one. I kept this secret completely to myself until I could stand it no longer and at the age of forty-nine, and twenty-three years into my marriage I finally broke down and shared this desire with my husband.

Others I’ve known shared this experience of ‘knowing since birth.’ But a few tell me that the desire seem to come to them after reading 50 Shades.

Is spanking usually, or often, followed by intercourse?

I’d say for most people in the lifestyle, yes it’s usually followed by intercourse. And if not immediately then soon. And the wait is often filled with delicious sexual tension! 

Others want the events to be separate. For the spanko the idea of discipline is a serious desire. If sex always follows immediately it begins to feel like the spanker is just following though with the spanking so that they get to have sex. The spanking itself means something to the true spanko not just a means to get your jollies.

What is the ratio of female to male spankers? Is it always the man disciplining the woman or can it be reversed?  

I couldn’t give you numbers, but the majority of spankers are male. And of all the couple I’ve become close friends with personally, it’s the women who bring it up and ask that it be brought into the relationship. The one exception was a lovely man from the Netherlands, Bas, who brought the idea to his wife – for him to spank her. She agreed and their relationship was greatly enhanced.  

There are definitely situations where the wife is the disciplinary to the husband. Because that is the way the couple wants it. It works for them. Consensual, remember. We’re talking about people, men and women who WANT spanking in their lives and have asked for it to be incorporated in some way.

The questioner went on to say - I think in other types of sexual play- people have roles and they don’t change- like domination.  

I’m going to say – without anything to back this up, that as a couple begins this journey the roles don’t change much. I do know of some Dom’s (tops, disciplinarian, spankers – whatever you want to call them) who ask the other partner to take the roll of disciplinarian for a day. Some women relish this role reversal, others hate it and only do it because their partner has ask them to.

I accomplished my goal of getting this all off my chest. I hope you have enjoyed reading some of it. I may be back with more some day. If you're ever confronted with these questions in real life I hope you will have the courage to give your answers. We’re doing what we want to do and not bothering anyone else. That’s basically all they need to know anyway.

Tuesday, January 21, 2020

Why would anyone chose to have a Domestic Discipline relationship?

So often I’ve wanted to be able to ‘explain’ us. I’d dream of going on a real talk show like Oprah or Phil Donahue (showing my age with that last one.) Not one of the trashy ones, but a show that allowed the explanation of differing view without trying to tell someone that they're wrong.

I asks my sister, brother-in-law and several friends to come up with questions that they have about the lifestyle. I believe the following is a good sample of these questions and I took the time to really think them out, for myself, and here are my answers. I realize yours might be different. Also I'm writing from a woman's point of view. There are men who find themselves being spanked too. But I can only write what I know.

You are a strong competent woman – why would you want someone to control you? Woman have fought so long for freedom from male domination, how can you ask for it?

I can surely see how this would be a sticking point for many. I am a strong competent woman. I can handle anything. I pretty much did the child rearing – not that Nick didn’t help, he did. But I really wanted the job and I enjoyed it. I could get my two little ones up, dressed, fed and to school on time and me back to my school, all after Nick had left for work. 

I could handle a classroom full of eleven and twelve year children and even teach them something. I handled all this plus keeping up the house and even cooking every night back then. In addition, I took care of my parents as they aged, paying their bills, dispensing the seventeen different medicines they took at various times of the day. I made actual life and death decisions for them at times. Trust me I can do it all and I know it.

But then my parents passed away and LJ was off at college and Mollie often busy and out of the house.

You can’t imagine the luxury of not having be in charge of everything. The absolute joy of sometimes being told what to do. For me beginning this journey was like finding a soft place to land. To be told, ‘You’re tired. Go to bed now.’ To be told, ‘You have to start taking care of yourself. I expect you to go to the gym four time a week.’ To be told, ‘You’re worried and stressed and anxious. I know how to release that stress and bring your focus back to ‘us.’’

I loved being told what to do instead of having to handle everything myself. When I was told to do something that would benefit me and I didn’t do it, I would be spanked. Since I’m a lover of the lifestyle this made me feel that he was truly seeing me, I felt cared for and cherished. He loved me. He paid attention to me and he cared enough to follow through and spank me when I blew off the things I should have been doing.

Not everyone in the world feels this way of course, but spankos do! I may not have been able to explain it fully here, but TTWD made me feel more loved than anything else in my life.

Does being spanked make you think submissively i. e. you think of your spanker as a Dom and you are the submissive, or is this just a means of titillation prior to actual intercourse?

This kind of continues on with the question above. Yes, being spanked made me feel submissive, feminine, cared for, loved – it did not make me feel like less of an equal partner. Since spanko crave these feelings of submission, the ‘dom’ is fulfilling her fantasies, and often his too. And all this is often a means of titillation prior to intercourse. While the spanking itself might be a titillation for anyone, for the spanko it engages our minds, not just our bodies. And we all know the mind is the most important sex organ we have.

Why do you feel you deserved to be punished?

This is a tricky one. Many spankos never feel this way and their spankings mostly focus on sexual play or maybe stress relief. But sometimes I did crave punishment and I honestly don’t know why. For all I know it could stem from past life experiences. But I know it was part of what I wanted and I know of other here who feel the same.

Was it difficult to find the courage to reveal your fetish to your partner?

To put this in true southern vernacular – Awww… hell, yes! Damn near impossible. I live in the real world. Who wants to be spanked? Who wants their husband being telling you what to do and spanking you if you don’t do it? For hundreds of women I’ve spoken with the answer is, “Me, me! I want it!”

I was forty-nine years old and twenty-three years into my marriage before I found the courage. It was nearly the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I did it by email after I’d found the blogs and been reading for several weeks. I remember Nick reading some of the stories I’d sent him and he asked me, “Are you sure it not men writing these?” I assured him these were fantasies of women for sure.  He also pointed out before anything ever began that what might be enjoyable in fantasies in our heads might not be the same in real life. He was right – it was so much better in reality!

Most people that have a desire to be spanked know how strange this will sound to other and we certainly don’t want out husbands or lovers to see us as sick or perverted. So it can take us a long time to come out of the closet.

One thing I’d like to add here. Most of my friend did choose to come out in their forties or fifties. That’s probably a good time. I don’t suggest this type lifestyle for young couples. I feel we do need to prove to ourselves that we can take care of ourselves before we ask our significant other to take the roll. Submission is a gift you give of your own free will to someone you trust with your life. I think you have to reach a certain point in your marriage or relationship before you would have the love and trust it take to make this work.

Come back Thursday and I'll answer more of the questions I received. If you have any you've been asked and you like to discuss it here, send it on.

Friday, January 17, 2020

Fantasy Friday revival - Never Go out Alone

Finally, Friday got here. Today's story is written by Carye, someone who has been here nearly from the beginning of my time blogging. We still contact once and a while on FB. 

This one is hot and spicy and takes place in a foreign country! What could be better. Enjoy...

Never Go Out Alone

Awaking suddenly, Rex realized that Amy wasn't in the room. Panicking he ran out of the hotel room and impatiently and repeatedly pressed the down button for the elevator. Deciding it wasn't coming fast enough he opted for the stairs, and ran down two at a time. "Where the hell was she? Didn't she know how dangerous it would be to be alone in this country?" he thought. As he ran out of the revolving doors, with great relief he saw Antonio.

"Antonio," he called. "Have you seen Amy?"

"Yes, she left about an hour ago. Por que?" he replied in broken English.

"Was she alone? Where did she go?"

"Si, senor, she was alone. I told her she should not walk the streets of Lima alone. She said she not want to wake you."

"And you let her go?" he said as calmly as he could.

"No, senor, I had Roberto take her where she wanted to go. She wasn't happy, but she agreed. He came back a few minutes ago. Said he took her to the Museo de Oro and she told him to go back that she would call you when she was ready to leave. But I don't think that she will. She was not happy with us taking her." Antonio said shrugging his shoulders with a look of exasperation.

"Antonio is it safe for me to go alone there. I remember the way and it is light out."

"Si, Senor, it should be fine. If you get lost call me here and I will come for you"

"Thank you," he said as he rushed off.

Within a few minutes he arrived and the Museum. Looking around he didn't see her. He asked and no one thought she was still there as it was closing time. So he headed back. Grumbling to himself, he swore she would regret ever leaving that hotel room. As he headed back he noticed a jewelry store and looking in on a whim, he saw a figure that looked very familiar. He took a deep breath to calm down, she was fine, he needed to get under control as he felt his terror being replaced with anger. He calmly walked up to her, scooped her arm into his and said, "It's time to go."

Amy jumped as her arm was taken and quickly relaxed as soon as she realized it was Rex. Then she asked, "What are you doing up? I thought you were napping? Don't tell me you came looking for me," she added, rolling her eyes.

Rex tightened his grip working to maintain control. "Why yes dear, I did come to find you. I woke up and you weren't there and I was afraid something had happened to you. We'll discuss this more when we get back. Now, let's go." He said with a strong, calm and determined pull.

Suddenly, Amy fell silent, realizing she was in trouble. "Sorry, Rex, I didn't mean to worry you. I left a note..."

Rex didn't reply. Somehow Amy thought that was probably a bad sign and followed him meekly.

Upon entering the hotel room, Rex gave a few curt orders. "Amy, go shower quickly, and dry off then get into that corner. I'll call you when I'm ready, and you better be there in five minutes."

"But Rex… can't we talk about …"

Cutting her off, he said, "oh we'll talk alright, and you'll answer….big time…."

"Yes sir," she said meekly and headed quickly to the shower.

Quick as she could she got out and toweled off and headed for the corner. She didn't dare look but could hear Rex doing calisthenics. She knew he was calming himself down, before they talked, but knowing that he was mad enough to need calming down, wasn't exactly comforting.

Soon, she heard different noises, shades being pulled, and shuffling through things in the bathroom. She shivered slightly, and shifted uncomfortably, she knew he was fetching implements and that the time was drawing near. She tried to prepare herself to be humble and meek, yet she knew she was still angry from being dragged out of the store like some animal.

"Just accept things, be meek, you love a DD relationship, you need this…" She said silently, trying to convince herself to submit to the pain.

"Amy!" Rex barked breaking the silence enveloping the room. "Come here and sit down."

"Yes Sir," Amy thought so far so good.

Sitting on a desk chair she noted it was up too high for her to rest her feet. They just dangled. Rex stood up with his back to her.

"Amy, where are we?" he started.

"Lima, Peru, sir."

"And what were we told by Dr. E before we came here."

She rolled her eyes, "To never go out alone but I was going to ca…" Rex cut her off.

"Stop, apparently your mind isn't right for this discussion yet. Get up, lean over that chair, hands grabbing the legs of the chair please."

"But..." with a fast motion he swept her up and plopped her in place. Giving her no time to catch her breath he laid a fire of volleys on her upturned butt. Quickly she went from a lily white to a dark pink. She wanted so badly to put her hands back and stop the barrage, but she knew that was a huge mistake, so she gripped the legs hard.

"You will listen and answer the questions, I don't want excuses or additional information about why you thought this was safe. I just want answers. Do You Understand?" He queried between swats.

Wanting to do anything to stop the pain, Amy quietly said, "Yes Sir."

Rex left his hand in the small of her back. "Listen up, we can talk face to face, or butt to face, I don't care which. I think you do though. You have one more chance to sit and talk with me. If there is a next time, you will be in this position a long time. Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes, sir." With that she felt his hand release her, and his arm help her up. She loved the feel of him so gently helping her. She knew when this was over, she would have that back, she knew her head was in the right place, and she would make it through this, and maybe, just maybe even deserved this.

Kissing her head gently as she shifted in her chair, he took a deep breath and said, "Let's try this again. Where are we?" he started.

"Lima, Peru, sir."

"And what were we told by Dr. E before we came here."

"To never go out alone"

"And why not?"

"Because it is a very poor country, Sir," she said.

With that Rex pulled out an email that their professor had sent. "Let me read this to you to refresh your memory…Peru is often said to be one of the most dangerous countries in South America. Most travelers leave without ever feeling they’ve been in a sticky situation. Peru’s widespread poverty means that street crimes (e.g. pick pocketing, bag-snatching and muggings) are common….Sound familiar?"

"Yes Sir."

"Look at me," he said gently and lifted her chin to face him. "If you were mugged, or hurt in any way, I don't know how I'd handle it. You mean everything to me. I can't handle the thought of loosing you. People have disappeared here. Generally as Doc said, we're safe. The government is stable now, and we're in the capital. But if something…" he stopped, not wanting his thoughts to go there.

"I'm sorry I didn't think. I wanted to be out shopping and not napping. I couldn't sleep. I…I'm sorry." She said realizing she really was sorry.

"Do you have any idea how panicked I felt when I awoke and you weren't there? I was terrified. I ran down the stairs because the elevator couldn't come fast enough." Not wanting to repeat the ordeal in his mind, he took a deep breath and started again. "If you got hurt do you speak enough Spanish to make sure you know how to describe things to the police and the doctors? And have all your questions answered in the hospital?"

"No sir."

"Now, Doc would help, but who knows how long you might have to wait for help there and I want to spend time together in Lima, not in a hospital. Do you understand?"

"Yes sir, I promise I won't go out without you. Honest."

"Now, you did take Roberto with you, when Antonio insisted, I'll give you some credit for that. However, I'm not amused they knew you weren't happy about it. They are wonderful and gracious hosts who are proud of their country and want us to have a wonderful experience. There are enough Americans that come through here and are rude and obnoxious to them, we are not one of them. In addition, I'm not happy that you told him to go home. You said you were going to call me?"

"Yes sir, I was going to have you meet me there so I wouldn't be alone."

"Yet, somehow, I didn't get a call and you weren't where Roberto left you, instead you were a few blocks away at the jewelry store. Did you teleport there? Or were you escorted?" he asked stiffly.

"Um, neither sir," she replied shifting.

"So, how exactly did you get from the Museo de Oro to the jewelry store?"

"Please, you know" she whispered.

"No, you need to tell me."

"I walked..." pausing she added "alone sir. I'm sorry"

"Were you really going to call? Or were you lying about that?"

"I was going to call. I even asked at the jewelry store, but their phone wasn't working. Then you came in …."

"If you had gotten a hold of me, what would you have done then? What could you have said? You knew you were in trouble didn't you?"

"Well, I was going to say Roberto brought me and could you come get me or something. I really hadn't figured it out."

"It's neither here nor there. So here is the way I see it, you tell me if it is different. You didn't like me napping, you were bored, and ticked that you had to stay around. You knew it was unsafe, but wanted to go to the Museo de Oro. You planned on just sneaking there, but Antonio saw you, told you not to go alone, and insisted despite you arguing that Roberto escort you. Then you dumped Roberto as soon as possible, without a plan other than to call me at some point or sneak home. Is that about right?"

"Yes sir, I'm sorry, I promise it won't happen again. I'm really sorry."

"Yes, I know you are, and I'm going to make sure it doesn't even cross your mind again to leave without me knowing where exactly you are going. Or if it does, your body will cringe remembering this and you won't leave. Ok, come here. Lean over the bed with the pillows under your hips." Tears already starting, she quickly complied.

Wasting no time, he picked up the brush. Smack! Smack! Smack! She jumped in shock at how painful it was on her already tenderized butt. She swore she'd never … then he picked up speed and intensity and all she could think of was how much it hurt. After a few minutes, he stopped. She held her breath. "Please be over, please, please be over" she thought. Sobbing, she apologized over and over, swearing she wouldn't leave again. He pressed on the small of her back and rubbed her bottom gently inspecting his work. "We have a little more to go my dear. I want to make this absolutely clear. Maybe in Kentucky it is less of an offence to do this, but here it is potentially a real danger. I will not... I repeat... will NOT have you endanger your life. Ever! You have paid for your sneaking; doing what you knew was against the rules, scaring me, and every other part, except for endangering yourself. You rest here; I think you need a little break." With this he stepped away, and sat down in the recliner, mindlessly flipping pages in the magazine. Slowly her sobbing came under control she wondered what he had planned next. She wasn't sure she wanted to know.

Rex waited a full fifteen minutes then got up. "Amy, endangering your life is one thing I will not put up with. For this, you are going to get ten strokes with a cane."

"What? But we don't have a cane?" she said shocked.

"I improvised. The rod from the shades should do just fine" he said smacking it against his hand then lightly on her upturned butt.

"I can't handle it. Please the brush is enough, I can't take any more!" she pleaded panicking.

"Brace yourself, I won't be gentle, yet it won't be more than you can take. When it is over, all will be forgiven and we'll snuggle up together. Are you ready?"

Tightening her grip on the pillow by her head and resigning herself to the inevitable, she took a deep breath and said, "Yes sir".

Wasting no time the cane whistled through the air making contact with her tender behind. She screamed a long cry into the pillow. He let her roll with the pain. He waited, letting it subside some and letting her catch her breath before landing the next stroke. Carefully and slowly he worked his way down from the top of her butt to the bottom of her thighs, never letting one stroke land on top of the other.

"This is the last Amy, you can make it." He reassured her.

"Please, not my thighs" she managed to choke out.

Complying he made the hardest stroke of the entire session land across her other stroke marks on her behind. Dropping the cane, he hugged her lying down on the bed, snuggling her in as closely as possible. "It's over honey, all is forgiven. I love you. You took that very bravely." He held her close and let her crying subside. Stroking her hair gently, whispering loving things into her ear. She snuggled into him, feeling safe, loved, and wanting nothing more in life than to be enveloped in his warm arms and body forever. He gently scooted her up on the bed, and snuggled closer. Soon, they both drifted off, spent from the afternoon's ordeal.

I want to add that Carye managed to write a story while caring for her four active children and her dear husband Papa Shrek and working from home. Yeah for you Carye, and thanks! Come on folks, if she can you ought to give it a try. I know everyone is busy,  but I hope a few of you or tons of you will help out. Send any stories to elisspeaks@yahoo.com