I have been a wife and mother for over twenty years. Now I am becoming my husband's lover, too.
We owe it all to my fellow bloggers who gave me the courage to come out to my husband as a spanko.
I do feel like this is a New Beginning for us.

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Tuesday, November 09, 2010

Just thinking and thinking

As I move toward feeling better I am looking closely at my life. I’m trying to be very aware of what is good and anything not so good I am trying to see if I can change it or else change my attitude toward it (the not so good things would be things related to my job, not Nick and me.)

There has never been a time in my life when things were horrible but when I found blogs and came out to Nick and found so many spanko friends things seemed to go from fine to fantastic. The friends I met here certainly played a huge part in that. It’s surprising, and maybe even silly, but our exploits took on an added bit of excitement by having friends out here to share them with.

But on blogs just like in real life friends move in and out of your life. I feel I have been luckier than most in that some of my friends who no longer want to blog are still very much in my life but it’s not always the same. There are many people that have begun blogging in the past few years that I really would like to get to know better. But lately I hesitate to reach out and the reasons are complicated.

I’m really trying to understand what it is I’m looking for these days and where I need to do my looking. I’ve been thinking a lot (Nick often says I think too much, LOL!). But it’s all good, I’m just feeling curious. And I’m sure I’ll be posting whatever I figure out. Shoot you know me, I post about everything.


  1. PK...I so know where you are coming from. I also tend to think and think again...maybe it is the teacher in us?? I also would like to reach out more to some of my blogging friends...but am wary of intruding. Maybe we should form a club! I know this is a very busing time when you are teaching..be kind to yourself!
    hugs abby

  2. I'm glad your feeling better PK. I often think of emailing other bloggers(a few I do)but as Abby say I don't want to intrude or I think do they want to hear from me.

    I know it's a busy time for you sop take care.


  3. PK,
    Don't hesitate to reach out to your fellow bloggers. Your post reminded me of a kids song that I know.
    "Make new friends but keep the old, some are silver and the others gold."

    So old or new we all need to reach out and this group of Spankos we have here all seem to be great in supporting one another!

  4. PK I am so glad that you are starting to feel better,I understand what you are saying about thinking to much, that is what sailor say I do as well, As far as reaching out, well that is what I did last year when I joined this wonderful group of friends, and happy I am that I did, When sailor is home I will not be able to blog, but that does not mean that I can not lurk or reach out to all of my friends, as for reaching out to me, please do any time you feel you want to.
    hugs to all
    Lil Sam

  5. Abby,
    That's it exactly. I don't want to give my advice to people who seem to be farther along in their journey than I am.

    I'm just glad we email one another. I really enjoy your blog, the way you and P relate to one another and your friendship!

    You are dead right. We really do need one another. I think I lost sight of that somewhere along the way and tended to withdraw. I really am going to try to do better.

    Lil Sam,
    Blog when you can, lurk when you can and please continue to comment anytime you can. I think we have to continue to support and learn from each other.