I'm going to get to it.

I am in a hurry up and wait mode and I hate it! Lots of things are on my plate and they pick at my mind and worry me but I can’t do anything about them just yet.

Cleaning – Trust me, at my house there I no need to clean early it will only get trashed again.

Cooking – All the stuff I am cooking will have to be done that day or the day before.

Packing – I am going on vacation right after the reunion for 5 days. Between the weight loss and being too cheap to buy lots of clothes I can’t wash and pack everything now.

Being with Eva after surgery – Well that is really going to have to wait until she has the surgery. It’s always something!

Really what can I do but blog? Sadly Nick sees it differently. He doesn’t see the waste in cleaning when it might have to be done again. I mean this is the kind of man who sees value in making a bed when you are just going to get back into it that night. Geeze! Please friends email me! Then I can honestly say “I’m not blogging, I am answering emails.” He may not see the distinction but he might. It’s worth a try!

This and That

Just a bit of rambling here. Next week I will be hosting our family reunion. This will be the 23 year of the ‘cousin’s reunion’ and 22 of them have been at my house. I do love it. We can have anywhere from 25 to 40 which is really only a small portion of the family but different ones come each year. This year they will be coming from Florida, Georgia, North Carolina, and California. We lost a beloved uncle this past week, so many of the family came in for that. Our family is very close and we all agreed with one thing said at the funeral. The minister said it was so unusual that such a large family, 8 siblings, had not only stayed in touch through out their lives but had been close friends too. That was certainly the case. I only have 2 uncles left on that side now and the 26 cousins feel that it is very important to stay close.

So with the reunion on the way there is much cleaning and cooking to do and we all know that is two of my strong points! Mollie won’t even be here to help. Next week she is taking drivers training! This child is 14! Just imagine how thrilled I am. I know it has to come but why so soon??

There is one more thing I forgot to tell you about my Potter weekend. I met Cassie and Tom! Look it’s not impossible, I may have! After all Paul goes to my gym and I get to watch him when I go, I know he claims to live in The UK but he sure looks like I know Paul looks. Now Cassie and Tom were at my mountain resort. Seriously I did meet and talk with the lovely older couple. I noticed that they always held hands and he seemed to always be looking at her. I couldn’t help but think of Cassie and Tom but it was just a funny notion until I looked up from my reading and saw a little convertible pulling out. I did seriously wonder after that but I did not see them or the car again. Come on Cassie, I know you guys were on a trip too, was it really you?

Potter weekend

My Harry Potter weekend was wonderful. I could not have asked for anything more. As you can see from the picture above I knew I had gone to the right place when I passed what appeared to be Dumbledore and an owl just a few doors from where I was staying. I am adding some of the pictures that I took because the look of the place added to the magic.

When I arrived just after lunch time Sunday I checked in and spoke with the owner and found out that she and her mother were the gardeners. I was telling her why I was there and she said my room would be ready soon and I was welcomed to settle in the garden to read. The garden was not too large but just look at how pretty everything was. Comfortable chairs were scattered about and I soon settled down to some serious reading.

A hundred pages later I decided to check out my room. Remember I wasn’t going for a speed record I really wanted to make the book last as long as possible. So I took frequent breaks to walk to the little town or just nap. But I really liked my room! Remember I was in the mountains the temperature was wonderful. Low 70’s with a slight breeze. One thing I loved about this little motel was that each room had a screen door that let in this wonderful breeze. Each room also had a ceiling fan so that I only turned on the A/C once. As you can see in the picture I had a nice rocking chair with an ottoman and a perfect reading light too. The second picture here is the flower box at my window.

I read late into the night Sunday. For me, an old TV fanatic I only turned it on once. That was to watch Big Brother – sorry I am hooked (Grace understands). The next morning I woke up at my own pace and walked to a dinner for a reading breakfast. Then back to the garden for a few more hours. I got to the point where I was dying to finish – about 4 chapters to go and I made myself stop again so I could finish during the evening. I laid down for a nap and left the door opened. I watched as a quick storm passed through and I loved listening to the thunder rumble through the mountains.

As a wife and mother of two teenagers and a teacher solitude is something hard to come by. The being alone with my book and my thoughts was wonderful. I really like spending some time alone. Only one thing could have made it better. I had a date. Nick drove up to take me to supper! He liked my little hide away and after a quick paddling for running out on my family we created enough heat to finally need the A/C!

After our afternoon delight we headed out to supper and a good by kiss and he was gone and I settled down to finish my book. The book was intense, detailed and in the end satisfying. I felt it was a fitting ending to the little story I had gotten in paperback and become so involved in over 9 years ago.

The weekend was prefect. The weather was fantastic, the setting gorgeous, the solitude delicious, the date loving, and the book superb. The sign beside where I stayed also caught my interest as I was leaving so here is one last picture.

Some things are not fair!

I’m back and I am looking forward to telling you about my weekend with Harry. But don’t worry I will be telling nothing about the book so don’t be afraid to come by if you haven’t read it yet.

I just needed to post a quick rant before I do anything else! I am mad that CeeCi has to take a break for any reason other that if she just wants to. How unfair is this. Now let’s think about this. If she was going out kicking puppies and her knee started hurting – okay that’s fair! If she was sneaking into old folk’s homes and waxing the floors and getting a bad back for her troubles – I’d buy that. If she spilled the end of the last Harry Potter book to someone who was trying to finish the book and was struck by lightening – well I would understand. But what is she doing that should cause her pain?

She is just setting calmly at home or in her shop sharing her thought with her friends, working on her fantastic pictures, tweaking her template and helping anyone with a computer problem that asks. It ain’t right I tell you, it just ain’t right! Sigh… I am sure not annoyed with CeeCi, it’s not her fault her shoulder is bothering her. But I have to complain to someone. Do you think writing my congressman would help?? I guess it’s worth a try.

Picture from http://go.funpic.hu

Happy Birthday!

Mthc it looks like you are going to be forced to stay home and eat birthday cake, get attention from your family, presents, a spanking with at least 48 licks (plus however many David wants to give you to grow on) and after that some hot monkey sex!




Gee sorry you don’t have a good book to read. Better luck next year!

I have to do it.

I imagine many of you are going to be shocked by what I have to say but those very close to me already know. I am leaving Nick for another man. Don’t pitch a fit. Nick has known this was coming, we have discussed many times. Eva knows and even though she might not completely agree she understands that it is something I really need to do. Of all my friends out here I am afraid Paul is going to be the most disappointed in me. I’m sorry Paul!

This weekend Harry Potter and I are headed off to the mountains so we can have some time alone. I did this when the last book came out and this time it is even more important. With all the hype surrounding the book, I need to complete it with in the first few days or someone on TV or the internet is going to try to tell me something that happens or how it ends. After all this time I am going to read it on my own!

So I don’t expect to be on from sometime Saturday until I finish the book, hopefully by Tuesday afternoon. At least that’s how long I have the hotel room for! The way spoilers pop up it will just be too dangerous to get online. After I finish I will be happy to discuss the book on email but I would never post anything that might actually give anything away. To all those who have been looking forward to this for years – happy reading!

Since you asked...

Todd and Suzy asked a question that you would think had a fairly simple answer–

How much do you think the spanking element of your diet has helped? Does it actually impact food/gym decisions you make?

When I started to answer I realized that for me the answer was not so simple after all. Strangely enough it made me thing of something our preacher said Sunday. It spoke to the underlying feelings that I think many spanko have. He said the opposite of love is not hate; the opposite of love is indifference. Hate takes caring, it takes energy, and it takes emotion. Indifference is much sadder.

This ‘spanking diet’ has been the constant since I came out to Nick about spanking. Stepping on the scale each Friday I had three huge questions in my mind. 1) Have I gained or lost? 2) If I have gained is Nick going to spank? Or 3) is Nick just going to let it go. And of the three the last one was the one that I worried about the most. Indifference. It scares me, it makes my chest hurt. This is something that Carye and I often discuss. Although we often worry about how bad the spanking might be the worry about the chance he might just blow it off or forget the whole thing is much more painful.

Nick has not done that. On reason I tried so hard at the beginning of the diet was that I didn’t want him to think I was ‘testing’ him, trying to force him to spank if he didn’t want to. I was afraid he would say ‘You are not even trying, let’s just forget the whole thing.’ At first I was more worried about that than the spanking. It has taken about a year to begin to let go of this fear (okay, I’m slow). And yes even now when we go a long period and there is no spanking I still worry.

So spankers I may just be speaking for myself, but I have a feeling I am speaking for a lot more of us – when we finally get up the courage to tell you that we want you to spank we often don’t make it clear to you what we are really saying. That is to us – spanking equals caring. When you spank you show us you care. If it is all in fun and erotic it shows that you listened and cared about what we want. If you spank because of discipline you show you care about us, our safety, our well being, everything. I think that is what we really want, to know that you care.

Well Todd, Suzy I bet you won’t ask me another question! You got the long version. The short version is now that I am more secure that he is not going to ignore a gain, now that I am more secure in the knowledge that he really cares, now that I got that damn hairbrush – the answer is yes, knowing he is going to spank my butt with that brush is one reason I go to the gym when I don’t really want to go and I will eat a Hershey’s kiss instead of a huge candy bar. The other way spanking effects the diet is that Nick’s willingness to spank shows me he cares for me; I work hard to loss every week to show that I care for him.

Happy New Year

The power of a year! My past year has been unbelievable.
Give or take a month the following things happened one year ago.

I began reading blogs.

I came out to Nick.

Nick started spanking.

Before last July we averaged having sex twice a month.

Last July we made love 21 times. (Yes I kept track!)

I began sleeping in the nude, kept that up year round.

July 16, 2006 I left my first comment on a new blog that I really liked. Some of you may read that site Nothing Random About a Spanking.

Later that day Eva emailed me. I don’t think we have missed talking in one way or another more than 4 or 5 days since then.

I began my own blog.

I ‘met’ and became friends with many, many wonderful people through my blog.

My friend here in town has gastric bypass surgery. Today she is 122 pounds lighter.

I have lost approximately 25 pounds.

I have a totally different hair style.

My beloved son left home to attend college. He was accepted into the Bachelor of Fine Arts program (one of 12). He made the Dean’s list for his freshman year. He is still my son and still loves me. I survived.

Who would have thought a middle age women would end up finding a best friend and twin on the Internet?

Who would have thought that at the age of 49/50 you would suddenly fall madly in love with your husband of 23 years? That I could go from someone who avoid touching to someone who craves her husbands touch anytime, anywhere. Who would have thought my sexual expectations would go from ‘Man on top, woman on bottom, get it over with quick’ to anything goes, oral, anal, toys, vibrators, plugs and as many position as our minds can think of and our bodies can still handle!

Who'd thunk it??

LISTEN!

I have been working on another post all morning its important and I need to complete it but this just couldn’t wait.

This post, as well as Eva’s, is a direct answer to C. Well actually not as much C as her husband and to all you husbands and significant others who just WON’T LISTEN!!

Guys – snap out of it! What do you want? Do you want a happy, close relationship with your wife? Do you want a woman with an entirely new attitude on sex? Do you want a woman who feels such love for you for allowing her to open up to you about something that means so much to her? You can have it!! It’s right there; she is begging you to understand!! Can’t you hear her screaming? Of course not, she is doing her begging and screaming in her head. She had tried to tell you and you blow her off, laugh a little, shake your head at her ridiculous request. After that happens we learn to shut up. But the longing doesn’t go away. It just keeps getting deeper and deeper along with all the rest of her feelings and emotions.

And then you have the gall to wonder why she lacks interest in sex? Well let’s see how you would feel if your wife says “Sure I will have sex with you but let’s don’t involve your penis. I won’t touch it and don’t let it touch me, but sure let’s have sex.” I know this is ridiculous but for some of us women the desire to be spanked is a central and overwhelming part of our sexuality. And you are asking her to engage in sex but denying her the one thing that she knows will turn her on.

I was so lucky and trust me I do know it! I didn’t have the courage to come out to my husband for 23 years. I robbed us both of those years when we could have been so close. But once I got up my courage he did listen! No he did not fully understand, probably still doesn’t but his willingness to hear what I was saying and try my ideas allowed me to change from a sexual frigid repressed woman to a warm sexual being happy and anxious to experiment sexually anyway either of us can think of.

I know that husbands that don’t want to hear this are also not reading here. I know I am preaching to the choir but please, please girls give it one more chance! They have to be willing to try! If they give it a fair chance and they just don’t like it well, I guess we can’t ask more. But fellows if the love of your life hands you this to read and you won’t even talk about it, if you are not even willing to try, well then maybe you don’t deserve this wonderfully brave women!

Summer Camp

Last week was interesting. We had a week mostly on our own. Mollie was at camp all week and LJ only shows up occasionally. The down side, Nick was sick. Not terribly sick but a sore throat and ear problems. I began to realize this might not ruin the week when he got back from Monday. He told me the doctor said that the best think for his throat and ears would probably be a full body massage. I want my husband well so we decided to try it right away. I slowly massaged hands, neck, feet and everything in between! He said that the doctor was right he did feel much better I know it really made me feel a lot better! Nick also said that his doctor gave him at least 3 refills!

Now the next day I went to pick up my new glasses. Upon arriving home I told Nick that the eye doctor told me that he thought my vision could be improved by a vigorous application of alternating sharp pressure to my gluteus muscle. I am not sure he completely believed me but he was willing to give it a shot as he said to improve “my focus”. I’ll be damned it worked; I was much more focused after he gave it a try! He used several nice implements including the ‘wrong’ end of the tawse! Now that leaves an impression! But he also used his belt and I quickly remembered why that is one of my favorites!

I told my twin about the advice the doctors had given us. Eva said we were a couple of medical liars! I don’t know where in the world she would have come up with that!

LJ was around for some of the week but we managed quite nicely. We even decided to go toy shopping. This was the store in the next little toy over, actually one we had not gone to before. It was very nice, much bigger than the other one there. There were a few other couples there they were around our age and looked like they had no more business in this store than we did! But I wasn’t bothered at all this time. We looked for a long time and saw lots of nice things. I am not sure about our final purchases. They are pretty much selfish for me. I don’t know…

We went Saturday and picked up our baby. But that did not put an end to the fun and games of the week it just quieted them down a bit. Saturday was Nick’s birthday. And I know I enjoyed his gift, I sure hope he did!

Update

I have done pretty well on my weight loss this year. I have lost about half of what I would like to. One more year might just do it. I have done it the way that I wanted to do it. I wanted to lose weight slow and steady, the way it went on. I hope that way I have a better chance of keeping it off. I am not great at eating right. I like meat and starches and sweets. Not the best diet for losing. I have changed my eating habits some. I watch my portion size a lot more than I used to. I don’t snack as much and I try to get more fiber.

Nick has been the constant through all this. Wanting to lose weight was the way I approached him on spanking in the first place. I knew how much he wanted me to be healthy (not skinny) and his agreeing to help in this way and then, wow, sticking to it! That is what has truly kept this going for over a year. Never have I stayed on a weight loss program this long. Of course I wanted to lose for many long term reasons. Avoiding health problems, increasing mobility, looking better but none of these things is as strong an immediate motivator as knowing when you step off the scales to an annoyed, disappointed husband with a hairbrush is waiting for you!

But like I said I have been doing really well and I think I have only been spanked for gaining 4 or 5 times during the year. I’ve been sweating it many more times and yes, knowing a serious spanking could be in my future does make a difference when I am standing in front of the candy machine!

The diet group that Todd and Suzy began is also a big help. I like knowing others have the same struggles – and the same penalties to deal with.I like having place where I can report my progress or problems each week.

It’s not like you can go to work and say “If I eat that Nick will blister my butt!” But it is nice to able to share with others that understand.

And lastly in this challenge is my friend the gym! I like going to the gym. I don’t love it – but I like it okay. The exercise I get there of course is great and is really helping the weight loss but there is something about the people there that really helps. One side of the gym is the rehabilitation center. I watch some of the folks there. I am sure some have been in accidents; some have had strokes or are recovering from broken hips.

I am fully aware that losing weight and exercising won’t prevent these problems but as I look at many of them and I can’t help but think how much easier their recovery would be if they were in the best shape they could have been before there were problems. I just want to go into the rest of my life at a reasonable weigh and with stronger muscles and bones. I will never be thin again; I think bikinis are a thing of the past. I don’t want to be a fashion model. But I am very happy with my life now. The children are growing up and healthy and Nick and I have the rest of our lives together. I want to make the most of it!

Now Hear This ...

I want to tell you about a foolish mistake I made that could have cost one of my beloved pets his life. Consider this my Public Service Announcement! Monday morning Nick found that one of the cats had caught and killed a bat and of course brought it in. Now had it been a mouse or a mole, big deal. But this was a bat. It is unusual for a healthy bat to be some where that a cat can catch it. Of course rabies was the first thing on our minds!

My first call was to the vet to check to be sure all vaccinations were up to date. My heart sank when I heard that one of the cats, the one who hunts the most, was past due on the rabies vaccine. My fault I am supposed to keep up with such thing but not really being worried about rabies I had put it on the back burner.

Next I called animal control. They said our other pets should have boosters but that the unvaccinated one had to be turned over to animal control until the bat could be checked for rabies. If the bat came back positive for rabies our sweet, loving, little pet would have to be put down. I felt sick to my stomach at the thought.

The animal control folks were very nice. They told me I could come visit him any time I like and I did. They stayed with me as I held and tried to comfort my confused kitty. I thought they were just being kind and trying to comfort me but I also realized they were probably making sure I didn’t grab him and run!

Gratefully the good word came on Wednesday! The bat tested negative for rabies!!!! LJ and I went to pick up our baby. He was sooooo happy to be home. He sniffed everything and every one. He ate, just in two days Nick and I both could tell he had lost weight.

Guys we really dodged a bullet. If you have pets check now to make SURE all vaccines are up to date. You never know when your pet could come in contact with wildlife. I would have been devastated if we had been forced to put down this loving pet. Believe me from now on I will always keep all my pet vaccinations up to date!!

Happy Birthday Eva!!

It’s my twin’s Birthday! What in the world do you get for the best friend you have? I couldn’t come up with just one thing so I decided to give her a year. These gifts go with the obvious truth that we both have a minimum of one week’s paid vacation each month of the school year and of course money is no object!

July 2007

The rest of this month is for relaxing and getting ready for surgery. For this month my wish for Eva is that regardless of the stress (or maybe because of it) I wish for her a wonderful birthday spanking with a combination of her new brush and backscratcher! I have certainly thoughts of Eva and Adam each time Nick has used their gift of the backscratcher. What have I thought? Why, bless their hearts, of course!

August 2007

Okay the big thing this month is the surgery, well not really, the really big thing is that the guest room will be finished and I am the guest!!! My greatest birthday give for this month is a flawless, painless, successful surgery! A gentle and quite recovery and tons and tons of emails!

September 2007

My birthday wish for September is that by the middle to end of the month Eva is feeling great and ready to go back to school! What kind of gift is this?? Sending her back to work? Don’t worry it’s a teacher thing, she’ll get it! It is also high time for Adam to begin introducing a few stinging swats to get her bottom toughened up for what is to come.

October 2007

Now it’s time for a good birthday wish. It’s October! Time to come back to the beautiful southern mountains. By now Eva and Adam need time alone so we need a nice mountain cabin surrounded by beautiful autumn foliage. A soft feather topped mattress in a rustic bedroom, fire place, hot tub, discreetly catered meals, and the chest. The chest? Go on open it guys – have you ever seen so many different spanking toys in your life?? Use anything you like, it’s all yours! Alright I will give you 4 or 5 days alone like this but then I am knocking on the door of your hideaway to let you know we have been in the next cabin over, just out of ear shot. Then we can spend the next few day visiting!

November 2007

I want Eva to get a little normal time this month. Good classes, kids are learning, not too cold yet. By Thanksgiving she will be so excited to have no back pain that she feels like making some of the family favorites. School will decide to close the whole week of Thanksgiving so she will have plenty of time.

December 2007

Now I know it’s starting to get really cold in Yankee land! Let’s head to Florida! I know Tig and Dante would give us a warm welcome! And would you believe that the first week in December is official spanko week at Disney?? All the southeast spankos are coming! Cassie and Tom, Theresa and Will (don’t worry you will be back for Christmas with Michael and as a bonus they gave him all of January off too) Reesa and D are coming and all the other spankos that love Disney!!

And Eva, Disney says it’s up to you – they will fly you guy and all your girls to Yankee land or you can stay in Florida and the girls will be flown to you! After all it’s YOUR birthday!

January 2008

And a New Year and we need a place for them to go. Now Eva can teach some but I think they need a week in Acapulco. There are some wonderful places to stay there. One nice place I researched had a private pool with each bungalow and every day fresh flowers are placed in the pool. And if you get the deluxe package, which of course they deserve, a new spanking implement will be beside the pool each day also.

February 2008

Alright here we are dead of winter and in case you might have missed that one post last year I will tell you Eva’s secret. She hates winter!! So let’s head to Las Vegas! That’s everyone!! Big spanking party folks! Now we are closer to CeeCi and Grace than we have been. We plan on seeing everyone from Texas and all points west of the Mississippi, east of there too we all need to be at the Vegas Spanking party!!!

March 2008

Alright Eva I know, I know you need time alone by now. Every blogger we know (including Carye and Debbie) were in Las Vegas. You two need time to unwind, be alone and try out all the toys Adam bought last month! I think for your treat this month I will send you back to Savannah and then to Charleston. You guys will love it!!

April 2008

Now this month I want to take you to one of my favorite places! Let’s all go to Williamsburg Va.!! Now Cassie and Tom love this place too so maybe we can talk them into joining us. The restored city is just like it was in the 1700’s, no traffic allowed, just people and horses. People dressed in period costumes, seeing how things were done back then! It is so much fun! And the Old Colonial Inn has nice four poster beds. Hehehehehehe!

May 2008

Now you go on and finish the school year and get another one behind you. Get ready for a wonderful summer! This would be another good time to come to NC and we will go to the Biltmore House. Not only is the house fantastic but May is the month the tulips bloom in there beautiful gardens. With Eva back feeling perfect we will walk all over that estate!!

June 2008

Summer again!!! Not just any summer it’s the summer when Eva and I are healthy and have achieved the weight we are going for. In other words folk we are now a couple of babes!! So this month Eva and I and the guys should head to the Mall of America because we need really need a whole new wardrobe!! Okay it is a girly girl thing to do but we will really need new clothes for the next month…

July 2008

It’s been a whole new year and a whole new Eva! Just as funny, just as loveable, just as annoying with the stupid sudoku puzzles. She and Adam are just as hot for each other and the only change is that he has to run a little faster when he chases her with the crop! Let’s finish out the month with another spanko cruise like we did for CeeCi’s birthday. And I promise Twin the boat will be steady as a rock and you will love it.

Eva I love you!!

Happy Birthday sister!!

What was I thinking?

I have a confession to make. I wasn’t going to tell you on here. Nick said that there was no reason for you guy to ever know, but I feel the need to confess. First I must apologize to my twin. Usually I tell her important stuff by email before I blog it but I was embarrassed and I was afraid she would come back and hit me. We usually agree about important things. Actually we agree about this – I don’t know why I did it, I just … did.

Since I don’t like to take responsibility for my own actions when they are less than stellar I think I will blame CeeCi and Theresa. I hope they both pay attention to what they write out here. Some people pay attention to what they write and it can lead them to do foolish things.
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I'm sorry Eva.

It's 'Kissed Petal'

Things to come

Mollie just got back from having her hair lighten. It looks beautiful. She is drop dead gorgeous so of course I hate it! Mollie isn’t leaving home like Michael is. I don’t mean to compare this to what Theresa is dealing with but it’s hard on a mom when her baby girl is doing everything she can to attract the opposite sex: hair, make-up, clothing, the whole package. It seems like such a short time ago that I was fussing every morning just to get her to comb her hair before she went to school. Now she must straighten, cut, curl or somehow “fix” it before we leave. She needs make-up before walking to the mail box. Her clothes have to be just so and most look more low cut when she wears them out than they looked when I bought them.

She is only 14 but will be starting drivers training at the end of this month. Of course this is another big thrill for me. Whoopee. She will be starting high school at the end of next month. I have had her at my school for the past three years and now when she is getting so very beautiful she is going off around guys 14 – 19 years old. I am not happy about that either.

One good thing for the moment, she is not boy crazy. Some of her friends have ‘dated’ 10 or 12 boys by now. They talk for hours on the phone and spend hours at our local teen arcade/snack bar/bowling ally ogling each other. She shows no interest in these activities yet. She will point out a ‘hot’ guy when she sees one but she is still a little shy and I am encouraging that as long as I can!

Not much I can do about all this. I do know what’s coming. I just wanted you guys to know it want I was going to be dealing with when I start complaining about Mollie.

Just an afternoon - please!

Hat off to you with children and teenagers at home! Hats off to you if you are maintaining any type of a spanking lifestyle. We were doing pretty well during the school year. LJ at college and Mollie babysitting on a regular pattern. Not so this summer. Mollie is working on a haphazard schedule; LJ usually averages about 2 evenings a week home. Even I don’t always know when Mollie is going to be working – how the heck does LJ know?? That is the only time he seems to come home!

Sigh…

Hopefully things are looking up for next week. Mollie is going to church camp for a week. This is her 7th year and she loves it! The first year she was only 8 and that first night I cried like a baby. Well I started after LJ and Nick started picking on me not having any idea how close to the edge I was. They learned not to do that!

But now I like camp as well as Mollie does and hopefully Nick and I will head to the mountains a little early. Maybe we can have a little special time to ourselves before we pick her up. Cross your fingers!

Say What?

Eva still believes that I talk like a southern. She is not only talking about my supposed accent but the occasionally phrase I use. I once told her on the phone that if I did something my boss would “Be on me like a duck on a June bug”. For you non-southern that means he would fuss quite a bit.

Phrases have come up a bit lately because of a teacher’s aid that retired from my school this year. She has always had colorful speech but this year in anticipation of her retirement roast we began writing down some that we remembered and she was consistently giving us new ones.

These were mostly use to describe some administrators or fellow teachers or students and please understand she absolute love all the children and these were all said in fun!

* His brain is so small you could put it in a gnat’s ass and it would rattle like a BB in a matchbox.

* I’m going to hurt you so bad we will need a Willie Nelson Benefit Concert for you to pay your hospital bill.

* Isn’t he just a floatation device?

* Don’t even breathe funny or I’ll send you home faster than a cat can climb a tree.

*If that boy’s brain was gunpowder he wouldn’t have enough to blow his nose.

Some of my favorites were her descriptions of the effect of those menopausal hot flashes!

*I’m sweating like a fat woman writing a love letter.

* It’s hotter than a nanny goat in a pepper patch.

*It’s so hot in here hell can’t be but half a mile away.

*I’m sweating so bad it looks like the cat’s been sucking on my hair.

* I’m sweating like a whore in church on Sunday.

I do like living it the south! I think we are so colorful!!