What do you think?

Folks I need your opinion on something. I think many of us have become good friends out here. Many of us leave each other comments. Some of us email each other and have gotten closer that way. Maybe we have shared our real names, maybe the state where we live. You know my twin and I have gotten close. We email, okay we email a lot. After awhile as we got to know each other better I needed to send her something in the mail so now I can threaten, “Hey, I know where you live!” And I included my return address so we stayed even.

But of course it was just us, no husbands were involved. Until one day I slipped up and forward something that Nick had sent me. Of course I immediately got an email back taunting me with “I’ve got Nick’s email address! I can tell him anything I want”. In a panic (this was a bit early on) I told her to delete it! She wrote back a very soothing “Oh keep your pants on, here’s Adam’s”. So we were even again.

We finally exchanged phone numbers; I can’t blame her, who wouldn’t want to hear a soothing Southern voice every now and then! But I do have to say that every time I hear that Yankee accent I do get a big grin on my! Mollie will look over and ask “Eva?”

But now last week there was a little change. Eva and Nick began emailing each other. Hmmmmm… okay I could make this sound bad but in all honesty I gave him her work address and told him to give her updates on how the trip was going so that was about it. Then when I got back she was saying how now she could email him any time with anything she wanted to say. I reminded her that I had Adam’s email address too. WRONG! Turns out she had sent almost a dummy address – one she checks for him!! Not exactly like I have Adam’s ear! I whined and pouted enough to get the real one with each of us promising not to use them unless there was an emergency!

But today, today… (and this is what I need your opinion on) today was different. This morning Eva called and Nick and talk to him after I left for work. YES! I am serious! Now I have yet to here a detailed version of this conversation from either of them. I am sure that Eva will comment or post something with her version of this event but in any true version she can’t deny that she called and talked to Nick at my houses after she was reasonably certain that I had left for work. Now for my question – should I call and have a long talk with Adam? I have lots to say and yes, Eva, I do have him number!! Let me know folks!

I let Eva preview this last night. She said I was mean and threatened to get even with me. She indicated that I had left out some important facts and while she might be right I told her it made a much more interesting post the way I tell it!!

Hack ... hack... hack... if you wanna know what REALLY happened, go here. It's the only way you can learn the WHOLE truth.

Tests results

Now don't be like some people who cheat and read the answers before you even try to take the test. If you haven't taken it yet run back here and take it!

I have been teaching for about…

20 years, this is my 19^th to be exact.

What three things did I get for Valentine’s Day?

I got a tawse, a crop and a plug. First two I love, just not sure about that plug yet!

What unusual pet does Mollie have?

So didn’t I tell you guys about the chinchilla? He is a beautiful little thing, light gray. And loves to run around on my couch and torment the cats.

My children were conceived after what two movies?

LJ was conceived right after we watched 9 ½ weeks. I liked the book so much better but the movie did put me in the mood. Mollie was conceived right after we watched Ghost. What a good movie, romance, sex, humor, intrigue and for me a beautiful daughter!

Before I began teaching I worked for a …

vet. I went to college to become a licensed Veterinary Technician. I love it and wouldn’t trade that time for anything in the world.

What 2 men out here do I have a crush on?

Who else – Paul and Tom, doesn’t everyone!!

How old was I when I got married?

I think most of you missed this one. I was an old lady of 26 before I snagged Nick!! My mom was 28 when she married so 26 seemed young at the time.

My son’s career dream is to become an…

Actor of course! As much as I brag on him and his talent I think everyone knows this.

My favorite spanking toy…

Varies from time to time. Every new thing is my favorite when we first try it out.

I have how many siblings?

Just one! But if I count all Nick’s family, which I often to, the numbers grows quickly.

I told Nick I never wanted to…

Wash dishes by hand! I have to draw the line somewhere!

I changed my hair about 10 months ago…

Well I sure didn’t go with my natural color, gray does nothing for me! After nearly 30 years I stopped wearing perms. I look like a different person. I am a different person. I wanted some outward sign of all the changes and this was it.

Every Sunday we eat with …

Nick’s family, usually 15-22 of us each week. His mom is the best cook in the world!

I first talked to Nick about spanking about …

I first brought it up about 4 years ago. We tried it and we liked it but I didn’t know exactly how to keep it going. No blogs or friends for guide lines so we let it die out.

I wrote my first spanking story around the age of …

of 10. I was 11 to be exact and I spoke it into a little tape recorder instead of writing it all down.

Eve has a right to be proud of her score. Nick didn’t make a 100! I told Nick I was scoring pretty high on some of these tests and I said I might spend too much time reading blogs! Nick informed me that he already knew I spent too much time here and he did need a test to figure that out!

Thanks to everyone who took my test. Even those who had to be dragged in kicking and screaming!!

Who knows the real me?

Okay if everyone else is going to try this I want to try it too. I think Nick could make a perfect score but I am not sure. And I doubt he will take it. But I do expect Eva to score pretty high and a few others. I have enjoyed taking this test at other sites! Alright everyone lets see how well you do!

Create your own Friend Test here

The Trip

And we're off!

I need to begin with the fact that we all made in back mostly in one piece. And with all the tragedies in the news this week I am most grateful for this fact! But while I can’t say enough about the really wonderful parents on this trip and how really well the kids on my bus behaved, we did have a few glitches on this trip. Mostly this is a blatant plea for sympathy and pity.

Everyone arrived on time and off we went 3 full buses. It was maybe an hour into the trip before the first bus nearly caught fire. It was throwing some pretty impressive sparks. The compressor for the air conditioner had burn out so no air on the first bus for the trip down.

Sleep was hard to come by on our bus as the bus driver and the travel agent talked loudly until after 4 in the morning. He spent half of his time telling her what a good Christian he was and the other half making derogatory remarks about blacks, Jews, homosexuals, smokers and alcoholics! I wanted to tell him to pick one or the other – good Christian or bigoted jerk – but in the end I decided feinting sleep was the wisest move.

Our day at Epcot was wonderful. The weather was beautiful, low 80. But we saw everything and it was so much fun with Mollie. We did a lot of walking however and between the sleepless night and being extremely tired we were so happy to get to the hotel! First problem there was the fact that they were one room short and they had no more. The air in one room didn’t work and most pleasant, one mother found that their bathroom was covered in shit, literally. When this was reported to the two young men at the desk the responded that they were sorry but that the cleaning staff was gone for the evening. To which I replied “Then which of you is going to clean it?” One of them finally did. So after being up all the night before I finally got into bed after midnight.

The Space center was the next day. All went well there. That night we went to Medieval Times, great food and a show that the kids really get into. I had just gotten my food when a kid came up behind me gasping in great distress with an asthma attack.

He later told us he had severe asthma and he was allergic to horses. His inhaler was at the hotel at least 30 minutes away! I called to the nurse (one of my parents) and we got the boy outside. Asthma scares me badly, there is so little you can do. But the nurse was great. First she got him cooled down with water and then got him coffee because both the steam and the caffeine help. All was well here also and we teachers took turns sitting with him until it was time to go.

We left there at 8:00 so at least we would all get to bed earlier than the night before. And we would have had our bus not hit a car coming around a turn. More of a scrub than a hit but the results was a three hour wait with the kids on the bus for the accident investigator to complete his report.

As we pulled in to the hotel around 11:30 while my children were getting off the bus a drunk came along wanting to start a conversation with them. This would have bothered me enough but he was only wearing a tee-shirt and a diaper! Again we got to bed around midnight.

I woke on the last morning tired but at least my feet were feeling much better a few blister but generally okay. Unfortunately as I was trying to get into the raised tub I slammed my toes into the side. One may be broken but probably not, the shade of purple they all turned is quite lovely however.

I enjoyed Universal as I limped through that last day. My friend and I rode the smaller rides while Mollie and her friends thundered thought the big ones. We got on one gentle ride after 45 minute wait on to go about 15 feet when the power shut down. I don’t mean the power to the ride, oh no, the whole theme park was without power!

They finally brought a ladder to get us down. But during the outage we could ride nothing, they would not let us use the restroom and worst of all we could buy no food!! Yep, rides, flushers, and cash registers were all down. Forty five minutes later power was restored and all was well.

Finally we were headed home and all was mostly well. The bus driver was still talking and two kids were throwing up but at least we were headed in the right direction! Can any of you imagine the joy I felt when I saw Nick at the school to pick me up?!

Well folks that’s how my week went. I survives I hope all of you survived your week too!

Saturday morning

Saturday morning helped me remember something I had almost forgotten. We had slept as we usually do these days spooning, turning, touching. I woke with Nick rubbing all over my body. What could possibly be better? Actually you know what could be better and that came next. We had the house to ourselves; Mollie was at a friend’s. As Nick was rubbing my butt he began to spank a little and then a little more until – WOW! He said I needed to start the day with a little color in my cheeks. It turned in to a great spanking! That’s what I had almost forgotten, with all our wonderful toys I forgot how good a hand spanking can really be.

It was soon after that that I learned how to use a condom! Fifty years old and that was my first time! That’s what I get for not fooling around as a teenager! By the time I get back from the trip I can go take the blood test that tells whether the pill is necessary or not. So hopefully condoms won’t be necessary for long.

I am off tomorrow evening so please hold good thoughts for me! Disney may never be the same again! Don’t write too fast or I will never get caught up. Look after Eva for me, I usually keep up with her during the day, she does keep my days interesting! And I guess Nick is on his own (Mollie will be with me) I am really going to miss him because he keep my nights interesting. I’ll be back Saturday!

Best time of the day

I am assuming winter is going to last forever. Not the weather, ours is pretty good at the moment. No I am talking about the winter doldrums. I love to be on the computer. I love reading everything everyone has to say but as other have said I really have nothing to post about.

As Eva pointed out there are an awful lot of people not getting spanked out here! I mean Dave and Cindy don’t even live together and they are nearly the only ones seeing any action! This is not right folks! I think we can blame most of it on real life. I got yelled at today by a good friend at school (I was right, by the way). Since I have been home, about 6 hours now, Mollie has not stopped talking long enough to take a breath. I am dreading the Florida trip (I will love it once the buses pull out, but not until). All these things make the days stressful.

But there is one thing I do look forward to everyday. These days it is usually the best part of the day! Every night I get to crawl into the bed with Nick. I curl up to his back for a minute then as I turn over he does too and spoons around me. Even if we are just going on to sleep he rubs my butt and touches my breast and I feel so close to him and so loved that it makes all the stuff that went on during the day okay. I’m good, I’ll take what I’ve got!

Even on TV!

Even though they would never show spanking on TV these days at least they throw us a bone every now and then. Tonight on a fairly new show ‘Terms of Engagement’ a couple begins filling up a box with items from their past relationships. One item the girl tossed in was a spatula. That was enough to cause Nick and me to grin. But as the show ended they decide to start a box of their own for their new relationship. The girl beams at her guy and says “Look, I got a new spatula!” Soon they are scampering off to bed when the guy runs back in, grabs the spatula from the box and runs back to the bedroom! We are not alone guys! With all they do show on TV these days who knows, our day may come!

Good report

I really did get a good report from my doctor. I don’t know this lady too well. My last OBGYN retired and I still miss him. But my blood pressure was lower and the best thing of all was that I had lost over 20 pounds since I was there last!!

So when she came in she said “You are doing great! What have you been doing this last year to bring on these wonderful changes?” I couldn’t help but grin. I gave her the vanilla version that my husband and I were working on my weight loss together and it really seemed to be working. She asked “Oh is he losing too?” Good grief no, he is too thin as it is! Then she asked if he was working out with me and again I told her no but that he was just very encouraging. Oh how much fun it would have been to blurt out the truth: We have decided that if I don’t consistently lose at a slow steady pace he is going to spank my ass hard! And I could have explained about how all the wonderful erotic spankings, fun, good girl spankings that I now receive have brought us so much closer and happier. But no! You can’t tell anyone the things in your life that you have found really work!!

Next we discussed menopause and where I stood. At the moment I thing I am having a lovely menopause! My one and only symptom is that I no longer have my period. That’s it! I can live with this. Then I asked her if I could stop the pill. She said we can find out but it means I have to go off the pill for 2 weeks then do a blood test that will tell them. When she first said it all I heard was “NO SEX FOR 2 WEEKS! Are you out of your mind” Now I know that there are other forms of birth control but we have just never used anything else. So we have two weeks to be creative. Trust me there will be NO risk of pregnancy!! I really have no believe that I could get pregnant, but this kid isn’t going to take a chance! I know my friends our here. While you would all be horrified for me you would probably be laughing your asses off too.

Our day after

Good thinks are happening and I have so little time to write! I had a wonderful Valentine’s Day morning! Early morning, as I was waking up before 6:00 I heard the bedroom door close and the next wonderful sound I heard was the switching of the new crop! Really is their a better way to wake up?? That thing does pack a nice sting. We didn’t have time for anything else but if I could have I would have stayed there all morning! I got a card and flowers too (tulip so I can replant them).

I had my physical this morning but that’s another blog. Health wise I am fine and dandy but a visit to a 0B-Gyn is always good blog fodder so I’ll come back to that another day! My appointment was at 8:45 this morning but I took the whole day off, Nick was home all day too. It was time for his Valentine gift. I had promised him all he had to do was wear the blindfold and lay back! I had lots and lots of fun! Nick didn’t look like he was suffering any either! I tried to leave nothing untouched from nose to toes! It was so nice to be able to take all the time we wanted and cuddle and nap afterwards.

I like Valentine’s Day. Valentine’s Day was my Dad’s birthday. Fifteen years ago on Valentine’s Day Nick got me roses. Why would I remember that? Later that day I took a pregnancy test and found out the Mollie would be joining our family. Fourteen years ago on Valentine’s Day we had Mollie baptized. I have pretty good luck on the 14 of February. I’m already looking forward next year!

New Toys!

Yes! The toys came in! I’m not sure when but he surprised me Saturday morning after Mollie left for her babysitting job. It was just a quick test, to see if everything worked. The two we tried work fine! What all did I talk Nick into…? Well I listen to my friends out here. Yes, we got a crop and a tawse and so far I really like them! They might both need more of a warm up that some of our other toys but I am really looking forward to seeing want they can do. Now the third one, well that was a plug and these little jewels should come with a warning – objects you order may be just a bit larger than you might have planned on when you ordered it in the first place! We shall see,maybe.

Even better than the toys is Nick’s willingness to get them and play. We are still newbie’s; I know many of you have been in this lifestyles for years. I know we have a mixed marriage. Nick wasn’t born to this as I was. Todd and Suzy asked if I think Nick is a spanko now. I don’t know. I too have wondered about this question, not that a labels matters, but I wonder what Nick would say. If I were out of the picture would he look for a relationship that included spanking? I don’t know. I guess it doesn’t really matter. All that really matters is that he knows how much this means to me and he is willing to give me what I want and need. What else could anyone ask for in a relationship?

What's in a name?

I found the first two of these over at Sky’s site and the last one at Suzq’s. I think the last one is pretty accurate. Try these for yourself. Detail on the new toys coming soon! What PK Elis Means

P is for Posh K is for Kind E is for Earthy L is for Liberal I is for Impressive S is for Slippery

What Does Your Name Mean?

Get Your Sexy Name

You Follow Your Head

You're rational, collected, and logical. Generally, it takes you quite a while to fall in love. In fact, you've even been accused of being very picky. While you're cool, you're not ice cold. You just know what you want, and don't mind waiting to get it.

Do You Follow Your Head or Your Heart?

Gee, thanks Twin!

If you haven’t read my twin’s tattling post, go do that now, then come back! You might be thinking with friends like this… But it’s not quite like that. These vicious truths she is spreading about me are not exactly secrets to Nick. That’s the thing, he is completely aware of my shortcomings and still things I am absolute perfect!

About the toys I asked for for Valentine’s Day, yes he did say one, and yes I did whine and beg for all three, but ultimately the choice to order all three was his! I just found this out for sure when we took an early Valentine’s Day today since we had several hours alone this morning. More details about this in a later post.

About the blood, I did NOT try to get them to take 2 pints. I was begging for a gallon. Didn’t work, they only took one pint and trust me that dose did absolutely nothing for weight loss!

You think Nick was shocked that I whined to Eva when he told me to put away the laundry, hardly! He knows I whine to her about everything but I whined about the laundry to him too. And I had to whine fast because it only took me about 5 minutes.

Now about the gym, yes she got the quote right and it was true but after we talked I went in and worked my butt off! I had told her about a time when I did go to the gym one night when it was very cold and very crowded and decided to take a nap in my car instead of going in. But that was a loooooong time ago and of course I would never consider anything like that now!

So between the arrival of the new toys, our chance to be alone and Eva spurring him on I am proud to say I got a wonderful spanking this morning! Eva’s name did come up, as he asked me “is this what Eva was saying I needed and do and you think she would approve??” Actually, yes on both counts!!!

After our fun morning Nick said something that Adam does need to hear. He reminded me that in school the person that is always tattling and going out of her way to stir up trouble is the one most in need of discipline! Therefore, Eva should get everything I got and more!! Nick said he was sure Adam would take care of this in a timely manner! Get busy Adam, Nick was in especially good form this morning!! Glad to be able to return the favor, Twin!

Strange afternoon

I have had a very interesting afternoon. A very nice looking man (not Nick) was sitting across from me staring directly into my eyes and asked me if I ever preformed sexual favors for money, drugs or other considerations. He was dead serious and I really wanted to ask “Other considerations? You mean like a spanking?” But I didn’t, I just answered no to this and most of the other question they had to ask before they would let me give blood. I have a weigh-in in the morning so I just hope they took enough to make a difference!

I am really posting today to confirm once and for all that I am truly and hopelessly insane and I am about to offer proof. Toward the end of this month I, and 5 other equally nutty teachers, will be taking 150 twelve year old and some parents on a 12 hour bus trip to Disney. See if this sounds like a pleasant relaxing trip. We board buses at 9:00 pm, after a full day at school. We drive all night; arrive in Florida in time for a big breakfast, then directly to the park where we stay until the fire works display at 10:00. Then we will finally head to a hotel where we must be sure everyone is bedded down and settled for the night. Early the next morning we head to the space center for the day, then that night to Medieval Times for supper. Up the next morning get everyone packed and loaded on the bus and then off to a second park where we will again stay until 10:00 pm, when we will once again board the bus for an all night ride home! We will arrive about 8:00 am and wait for all the parents to pick them up. Good grief, I’m tired just writing about it! I think this is my 7^th time taking this trip so I know it can be done but at times like this I can tell that I am getting older.

Last year I spent the day we left for Disney in the doctor’s office where they preformed blood tests and took x-rays to see why I was in such agony. My neck, hands, arms and knees were in horrible pain. Several months later the doctor figured out the problem and soon the pain was gone but it did make the trip a nightmare. Thank goodness Mollie and my niece went along last year, they helped enormously. Mollie is going back with me this year. I hope it will be much more enjoyable!! Please wish me luck!

I love my computer, my friends live inside!

Sad

I didn’t do much commenting yesterday but I feel like I spent much of the afternoon watching Theresa. Kay is a good friend of mine; yesterday her mother had a massive stroke. Although she was in her early 80 she was active, lived alone and drove. She was on her way to the doctor for a routine visit yesterday morning when she must have felt something was wrong. She pulled in to a parking lot where someone found her slumped over the wheel and called 911.

Today while I was at the hospital Kay could not say enough about the nurses that had helped them get through the past 36 hours. She spoke of the gentleness they showed not only to her mother but to the whole family who gathered in shocked sadness. I did think of Theresa as I watched these special women. I guess none of these were actually Theresa but that’s the way I picture her. Kay’s mother passed away shortly after I left the hospital I am glad she and the family were surrounded by the love and support of the nurses.

Cleaning

I asked the Lord to tell me

Why my house was such a mess.

He asked me if I has been “Computering”

And I had to answer “Yes”.

He told me to get off my fanny

And tidy up the house.

And so I started cleaning up…

The smudges off my mouse.

I wiped and shined the top part

That really did the trick…

I was just admiring my work…

I didn’t mean to click!

But click I did and oops I found

A real absorbing site

That I got so way into…

I was into it all night.

Nothing’s changed except my mouse

It’s very, very shinny.

I guess my house will stay a mess…

While I sit here on my hiney!

I can't claim credit for this poem, but if all the little old ladies in my church continue to send me such good emails I'm going to use them occasionally.

Speechless at last

I did it, I did it! I know it won’t last but I finally got Mollie so flustered she actually had nothing to say!!!

Mollie swears I always favor LJ, she calls him ‘special boy’, although she adores him to. She said he could get away with murder while I was on her case about everything. Since their personalities are so very different I can see why she thinks that. LJ has never talked back or spoken to me in anyway but with respect while Mollie argues with me if I say something controversial like good morning.

Ever since LJ left for college she has been going on and on about wanting his room. I am not ready for the switch for several reasons but the biggest one is that I don’t want LJ to feel he is losing his home, his room, at this critical point in time. This is probably more or me than him but…

She says she wants it because it’s bigger. It may be slightly but not by much. She says the closest is bigger; it has two windows, better lights, better paint on the wall, better carpet, better air everything!!

Today her argument was that her walls were too thin. She said she could hear everything that went on in the living room, what we were watching, what music we were listening to and all of our conversations. To which I answered “So you want to move to LJ room and share a bedroom wall with our bedroom?? She just looked slightly stunned and actually had nothing to say! And yes that is one more reason I am not in favor of the move!

I love the weekends!

Nice, nice Friday night. We were both tired so even though Mollie was off skiing I wasn’t sure anything was going to happen. I had played on the computer for a while then a short nap. When I woke up Nick looked over at me and said “You know there is a wooded spoon in the kitchen with your name on it!”

Wonderful! Back to the bedroom, toy box out, spoon retrieved from the kitchen, I got a massage with the little standing Stanley, my legs, my back, my butt. So nice! It was a good spanking, he used the spoon, the leather paddle and then I was not able to keep everything straight! Bless his heart he does know what I like. He gave me the vibrator and then he used the plug which was just fantastic! Once I recovery my senses I was happy to turn the table on him and completely have my way with him! What fun, this included letting him have some first hand experience with the wooden spoon. He agreed that it was very stingy! Of course I barely used it! But then again I am the spanko in the family! I have to say the sex was just out of this world but there was another part of the evening that was just as good!!

We talked about toys! I had been teasing him about a Valentine’s Day presents. We went on line looking. Now Nick is not an internet shopper but at least now he knows what I have in mind. I am looking for something that will leave a lasting impression, something I can feel the next day. That’s very rare. But it sometimes happens with his belt so I kind of want to try something in the strap family.

I am also open for suggestions from any of you guys. What have you used that you felt most keenly the next day??

I know he still sometimes fights the “I don’t want to hurt you” thoughts. But I think he is coming to realize that I can take harder and longer than he used to believe and that I love it! As I told Carye in an email, I am pretty damn lucky to be 50 years old and the biggest complaint is that my husband doesn’t spank long enough or hard enough!! Not exactly an earth shattering problem!!

Snow Day!

We did it, we did it!! First time in two years but we got off for snow! Eva probably wants to throttle me since she gets 6 feet of snow every day for 6 months and we didn’t get enough to cover my carport but too bad for her, I still got a snow day.

Being a true southern I participated in a great southern tradition yesterday evening. Mention snow and we all in mass run to the grocery store for bread and milk!

Well that’s not really true, I tend to run out for chips and dip, Sundrop, cookies, pizza, pudding, popcorn, brownie mix, peanuts, cupcakes, honeybuns, marshmallows, hot chocolate, and a variety of other junk foods. Unfortunately, I am in the process of trying to lose weight. So did I think about that while I was at the grocery store? Yes I did! Did I buy food to help me continue my weight loss? No I didn’t! I mean its cold, don’t we need our insulation?? Evidently Nick doesn’t think so because as we unpacked the groceries he reminded me I have to weigh in the morning snow or no snow!

Things are pretty pleasant at home. Now my snow day is not quite the one that Eva portrayed. Mostly because Mollie is here with us but she is going skiing tomorrow night so we might get some alone time yet!

One little thing happened last night that was fun. Although it’s cold I still don’t sleep in anything but as I tried to get settled last night there was something wrong with the sheet. I got up and tried to fix it from the foot of my side and got back in be again but it still wasn’t right. So I tried to fix it by crawling around to get it where it was supposed to be. Nick finally gave me two hard pops and laughed and told me to be still! He then spooned around me to get me warm as well as to keep me still. It was just a little thing but I did go to sleep with a smile on my face.

Well here's hoping for a delay tomorrow!

Eva's afternoon

Since Eva seems to have no problem advising me to spend more time talking to Nick, I thought I would advise her not to keep some of her secrets from you. But then I thought – shoot, I’ll just tell them for her…

Eva was in the grocery store the other day went she spotted a really nice looking guy. Although she has only seen him once before there was no mistaking who he was! She gave him a shy smile and a wave.

Now the guy is a bit unnerved at this beautiful woman that he cannot place is waving and coming over to him (you do remember that beautiful twin thing don’t you). As she reaches him he asks her “Do I know you?”

Eva with total calm looks him right in the eye and says “I think you are the father of one of my kids.” Not what the poor guy was expecting to hear. But like a flashback he realizes who Eva must be. It all came back to him in a rush, the one and only time he had ever been unfaithful to his wife.

“My God, are you the stripper from my bachelor party that I made love to on the pool table while all my buddies watched while your partner spanked my ass with that leather flogger???”

Eva looked into his eyes calmly and said “No, I’m your son’s math teacher.”

Alright, perhaps it didn’t happen, but doesn’t it make a great story?!