I have been a wife and mother for over twenty years. Now I am becoming my husband's lover, too.
We owe it all to my fellow bloggers who gave me the courage to come out to my husband as a spanko.
I do feel like this is a New Beginning for us.

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Sunday, January 17, 2010


It was actually friend Grace, my good friend who is worried now, who asked the question back near Christmas that got me really thinking and mind blogging the question “Why do bad things happen to good people?” She wasn’t the only one to ever ask the question and I am certainly not the only one to ponder the answer. The answer I left her in comments is the only accurate answer ‘I don’t know’. But I kept mulling it over and I remembered something I had heard a long time ago. I heard it on a soap opera of all things but it was very thought provoking.

A priest was trying to explain why something awful had happened in this person’s life. He used the back of a piece of cross stitching to explain how we view life. It’s often confusing, unclear, it’s not ugly but it often doesn’t make a lot of sense. Why does this string jump and go way over here? Why is this piece broken off? Why is this part tangled and knotted? Why isn’t the picture clear?? The reason is because we are seeing it from our side. The only side we can see during our life. Although we can often see a vague pattern forming, the details and true beauty of our lives, the whole plan – so to speak – can only be seen from the Creator’s side.

What we see as a confusing tangle from our side is truly beautiful from God’s side. He knows the detail and the pattern and why things happen as they do. God does not will that the knots and tangles are there but He knows it’s all coming together to form a beautiful life. From His side it’s perfect.

You know when our kids were small we all took them for their vaccines. Picture them around 2 years old. We take them in and even as they are safe and secure in our arms someone sticks them with a needle. It hurts and they cry, sometimes we cry with them. Sometimes we get that look like “Someone just hurt me on purpose and you didn’t do anything to stop them. Why?”

And what do we do? Do we try to explain to the two year old how a vaccine works and how they can protect us from disease? Nope, we just hold them close and tell them we love them and that we’ll take care of everything. They just need to trust us. When bad things happen I think that is what God wants to do for us. We just have to try to let go of the worry and fear as much as we can so we can feel and hear Him. So maybe the answer to why bad things happen isn't as important as knowing God is going to be with us through whatever does happen.


  1. This is so beautiful! Thank you, it made me a little teary.

    It's just perfect and I'm going to remember this as I go through my journey.

    I love you!

  2. PK, I won't add anything to what I said earlier.
    The Universe know what we need and provides just that, though ofttimes we do not recognise that.
    Love and warm hugs,

  3. PK: So much insight in that post. You explained it really well. Something for all of us to remember when we're going through bad times.


  4. I've said that many a time PK, "Why does it happen to only the good people". I've lost too many good friends.

    A lovely post PK, thanks for sharing. I'll remember this.


  5. Grace,
    It's not a journey any of us would have chosen but we're going to troop along with you until we get to the other side of it. It's a bitch but knowing us we may even find a giggle as we follow it's ups and downs.

    You're right. We're going to have to learn to recognize what we need.

    Hard times is something everyone will see many times over our lives. For me knowing God is in charge takes the burden to have to understand and fix it all off me.

    Thanks Ronnie,
    Some things just roll around in my head and writing them is my way of thinking.

  6. Anonymous10:52 AM

    I'm a little late reading this, but I really appreciated it. I believe God is in control of everything that happens. J and I have had the hardest 3 years of our lives (and neither one of us had it easy growing up) I look back and wonder how I'm still emotinoally thriving. it would be so easy to be a blob. It's easy to forget that God's there for you when you're going through things but it really helps when you can. thanks for the reminder

  7. jsll,
    I know he's in charge it's just that when everything is so crazy we forget sometimes. We have to take time to refocus. We all need to work on that sometimes.