I have been a wife and mother for over twenty years. Now I am becoming my husband's lover, too.
We owe it all to my fellow bloggers who gave me the courage to come out to my husband as a spanko.
I do feel like this is a New Beginning for us.

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Monday, September 12, 2022

Things you need to know if you move to the south

1. A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.

2. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in the South.

3. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 of them live in the South, plus a couple no one's seen before.

4. If it grows, it'll stick ya. If it crawls, it'll bite cha.

5. Onced and Twiced are words.

6. It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy!

7. Jawl-P? means: Did you all go to the bathroom?

8. People actually grow, eat, and like okra.

9. Fixinto is one word. It means I'm going to do something.

10. There is no such thing as lunch. There is only dinner and then there's supper.

11. Iced tea is appropriate for all meals, and you start drinking it when you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar. It is referred to as the Wine of the South.

12. Backwards and forwards means I know everything about you.

13. The word jeet is actually a question meaning, 'Did you eat?'

14. You don't have to wear a watch, because it doesn't matter what time it is, you work until you're done or it's too dark to see.

15. You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH ‘em.

16. Y'all is singular. All Y'all is plural.

17. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect, or animal.

18. You carry jumper cables in your car for your OWN car.

19. You only own five spices: salt, pepper, mustard, Tabasco, and ketchup.

20. The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local high school sports, motorsports, and gossip.

21. Everyone you meet is a Honey, Sugar, Miss (first name), or Mr. (first name)

22. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.

23. You know what a hissy fit is.

24. Fried catfish is the other white meat.

25. We don't need no dang Driver's Ed. If our mama says we can drive, we can drive!!!

26. If you understand all these, y'all come on down. We'll be glad to have you! 



  1. LoL PK, these are hilarious and I certainly learned some things. Jeepers, the snakes and spiders put me off. Eek!


    1. We do have snakes and spiders, but in my whole life I've only run across snakes about five or six times. And all were harmless. Of course the one I found in the car when I was driving nearly made me wreck.

  2. Deena9:14 PM

    Lol! I’ve not spent much time in the South so this is appreciated! The snakes though…ewwww

    1. They won't bother you, seriously. Now some of the people might!

  3. Anonymous6:27 AM

    Thanks for the information on the South. We visited Nashville years ago and went on a day-long bus tour of the city. At lunch everyone was automatically given glasses of sweet tea. We sipped ours politely, but a family from New York insisted on getting colas instead. It's an acquired taste, to be sure.


    1. I'm embarrassed to say that as a good southern I don't like tea myself. I'm a little strange to everyone I know and I'm the only one around here that doesn't like tea.