I have been a wife and mother for over twenty years. Now I am becoming my husband's lover, too.
We owe it all to my fellow bloggers who gave me the courage to come out to my husband as a spanko.
I do feel like this is a New Beginning for us.

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Tuesday, December 03, 2019

What have I done?

I’m writing at the moment to avoid a mild panic attack. After no work being done on the living room in months everyone is coming today and tomorrow. 


I want Nick here to answer their questions. I want me somewhere else so they won’t ask me. The last change in this room was about twelve years ago. Nick took the paneling I hated so much down in the living room. He put up drywall and painted. Then he painted the paneling down the hall. He did all this while I was away on a long weekend and I wasn’t consulted about anything including the paint color. I just walked in to a total surprise – and I was thrilled! 

Being here to answer the questions myself is scaring the you-know-what out of me! I keep getting questions like…

“Do you want new hinges to match the doorknobs you chose?”

“Do you want that book case moved over an inch to avoid that tiny strip you’ll have to paint.” 

“Where you want the lights, now there’s a joist there. Which side do you want it on?”

“You want the switch here or here?”

“Do you want the wigglewanps to line up with the doohickies or the zipsorts?”

At least it all sounds like the last question there to me. I can make all the decisions but I don’t what Nick to come in and say, “Well that not where that was supposed to go and the hole already cut into the ceiling or the wall.

Nick says, “It’s up to you honey, whatever you want.” That should sound sweet and accommodating. But in reality is sound like I’ll be taking the heat for whatever goes wrong. Nick’s not really mean like that at all, I’m just nervous!

Very nervous!

Thank you all, even writing this much calmed me a little. Don’t guess I’ll be getting back to the new book until after the new year. There’s a few too many people in the house for writing good spanking stories or sex scenes!


  1. I understand your angst completely. I am not a decorating/renovating kinda gal and when it comes to those technical questions I am clueless. Sadly this means I have no advice to offer but I sure do have a lot of empathy. Sending a virtual hug.

    Oh. I'm pretty sure your company won't care a bit about any of this. They are just happy to see you ;)

    1. I appreciate the empathy. I can use all you got. It's not company that's coming that has me worried, it's all the workmen themselves. But at least it's getting done.

  2. ohhhhhhh lordie PK -- I get the no wall comment but it is much more than new wall!! GAH! let's commiserate..... the contractor tore down our front deck and front steps on Oct 3rd. We have been using the back door -- and having problems with ALL deliveries cause for some reason they can't find our back door.

    All the furniture that was on the front deck is in our guest room. Christmas is 3 weeks away and Christmas = guests!

    The contractor started rebuilding the deck on Nov 20th and then disappeared. He has reappeared today. I lost my temper (le sigh) I am thinking I may not see the new deck for this Christmas ...... maybe Christmas 2020??

    I totally feel your pain...........

    1. You do get it! And let's not go into where all the furniture is stuffed. On top of Christmas stuff. I spent one whole summer with an outdoor kitchen because mine was ripped out. On the carport was the refrigerator, a toaster over and the microwave. What fun!

  3. Love this line! “Do you want the wigglewanps to line up with the doohickies or the zipsorts?” HAHAHAHAHA Hang in there and good luck! Hugs, Windy

    1. I swear that's how it all sounds to me!

  4. I feel you PK, I am definitely not a renno girl. Good luck!


    1. I really don't like it - I'm waiting another 36 years before I try anything this big again.

  5. Harry is great at building things but has no sense of what is ‘aesthetically pleasing’. As long as they work he’s happy. That’s why I do the decorating in our house. We are starting major renovations in the New Year and I will be on hand to make sure everything goes to plan.

    There’s no shame in telling workmen that they must ask your husband to answer those pesky questions though, don’t feel bad about it.

    Rosie xx

    1. I will be directing them to Nick for answers. I hope everything goes quickly and smoothly with your renovations, and it it does, will you come help me?