Nick's response

I am still thinking about Cassie’s advice and it’s a good feeling. I knew as I was typing it up that I was going to ask Nick to read it. When he got home Monday afternoon. I told him, “Please read my post today and read the comments too.”

He sat right down and opened his computer. He read it then looked up and grinned. “Cassie’s a pretty smart lady.”

I couldn’t agree with him more. I was in my chair, computer on my lap with one cat draped across my legs, the other across my chest, when Nick said. “We do need to have a meeting in the bedroom. Be sure to remind me the next time you get up.

Just for the record, it’s been a LONG time since I’ve been spanked. But soon enough I dumped the cats and told him I was getting up. Back in the bedroom he motioned for me to lay over the bed and I was very obedient, except to say, “Now don’t make it hard for me to enjoy you.”

He pulled out Blondie’s paddle – one of my favorites (in

appearance), but it’s still wood. Nick does not usually lecture and that’s fine with me. I was pretty sure I knew what this was all about. But he lectured this time.

“You had a good week last week. You got in all your steps, you’ve been coming to bed on time and you only gained .4 pounds. But those .4 put you to the line you aren’t supposed to cross.” He’s happily spanking away all this time. He went on, “Now being the sweet, kind, loving husband that I am, I would have given you a pass since it was Thanksgiving week. But no, you said you wanted me to be a hard ass and hold you to our agreement completely. So, that’s what I’m doing.”

Good grief, how can he spank so fast and talk so slow? He said to keep up the good work but that next week there would be no reason to be anywhere near that horrible number. I got a big hug as he finished.

It was a good evening. I’m keeping Cassie’s mantra in my head. Enjoy your husband.

*Remember to head to the Reading Room today for more questions. There will also be a brand new Fantasy Friday this Friday!

I wasn't expecting that

I asked Nick the question from my last post – What’s the worst thing I do, something that really pisses you off? Something you’d really like to spank heck out of me for?

As I suspected, he didn’t have a clue what I was talking about. He’s laid back and I really don’t do much to bother him. His answering email said in part,

Since you are almost perfect, of course, there is little to complain about. I will have to be more aware.  If you have something in mind you can ask how I feel about it.

I can’t fault him for not knowing since I’ve spent more than thirty-five years, on and off, hiding it from him. What is this horrible, despicable thing I do?

I pull away from him. I shut him out and live peacefully in my head for long stretches.

I don’t scream and yell, I don’t curse and throw things. I slip away so quietly and so undetected that I’m sure he rarely knows I’m doing it. I don’t pout, I don’t give him the silent treatment, but I rarely start conversations. I don’t even give him dirty looks or eye rolls. I just go way where nothing he says or does affects me. It’s the ‘sure, fine, whatever’ mode. This may not seem so horrible, but it can seriously damage a relationship.

Sometime I wish he noticed. Sometimes I wish he’d call me on it. Sometimes I wish he’d give me a hard, serious spanking to snap me out of it. And if he doesn’t think I’m truly ‘back’ when he’s finished, I wish he would spank me again. Sometimes.

Other time I’m glad he doesn’t notice.

Boy, I can hear Nick’s thoughts on this. “Let me get this straight, I don’t know when you’re even doing this, but I’m supposed to recognize when it happens – even though you’re giving me no hints at all. But if I think it’s happening I should bust your ass, unless it’s one of the times you really don’t want me to notice, and then I should just leave you alone. Is that about it?”

Well, yeah, sorta.

When I was writing this post, and got to this point, I went into true writing mode, meaning I was staring into space trying to formulate what I wanted to say, when something happened. In all these years, it had never happened before so I simply sat stunned listing to what I can only call a lecture from one of my best friends. Here’s what Cassie had to say.

~o~

Enjoy your husband. Pay attention, and enjoy your husband. Enjoy him when he is in a happy, loving, playful mood. Enjoy him when he’s tired and crabby and withdrawn. Enjoy him when he’s mowing, doing the laundry, and cooking. And enjoy him when he’s sitting beside you quietly watching TV or reading or even napping.

Enjoy him for who he is. You chose one another above all others in this world to share your lives together. And most importantly, after more than three decades you’re both still there. Do you know how many women would give their eye teeth to be in your place?  To have a man who truly loves you. A man you can trust completely and who is completely loyal to you. You’ve never had to worry about infidelity. You’ve never had to worry about drunken binges or abuse. You have a man who cares for you and will listen to you – if you will just talk to him.

Enjoy him when he’s annoying you. Enjoy him when he’s being inconsiderate or thoughtless. Enjoy him when he hurts your feelings or snaps at you for no reason. Enjoy him, but you don’t have to ignore these things. I’m telling you to be a wife, not a wimp. Tell him if he’s annoying you or being inconsiderate or thoughtless. Tell him if he hurts your feelings. What do you think is going to happen? You tell him these things and he gets mad and says, “That’s it, I’m leaving. Marriage over.” You know that’s stupid. So, you argue, big deal – you’ll both get over it.

Talk to the man! Tell him when you’re happy, tell him when you’re mad. Stop living in your head and enjoy this wonderful man you have. When you’re mad or hurt, you need to tell Nick and stop thinking in your head, “Well, Tom would have… or Tom wouldn’t have…” – because I know you do this sometimes. Remember, Tom is mine and only mine. No one else would put up with him. Trust me, you would hate being married to him. I have the occasionally dream of being able to do anything I want any time I want with no worry about the ivory brush. Everyone has ‘the grass is greener…’ feelings at times. But never stay there more than a minute or two.

You’re living on the fringe of your marriage, it’s like you’re scared to get involved.  You’ve chosen peace and harmony rather than fire and passion. Maybe try it the other way for a while. You don’t have any big problems in your marriage. Quit nursing the little ones and learn to enjoy what you have.

Enjoy your husband!

This was out of the blue. Cassie tells me her stories, but she’s always stayed out of my business. I know, I know, Cassie is just another part of me. So perhaps I was lecturing to myself, but it didn’t feel that way. Regardless, she wasn’t wrong. I think I’m going to try to take her advice. Hmm… taking Cassie’s advice on marriage, it should either bring Nick and me closer or I’m going to  get my ass spanked. Sounds like a win/win to me.

A question for Nick

Thank you, to everyone who came by and commented on LOL Day. It was a big day for me with the release of Cassie’s Life too. I’m proud to have participated in every LOL Day since it began twelve years ago.

Unfortunately, I was not feeling my best over the weekend and I’m not feeling much better now. The cold is lingering, at least the

cough is. And I just generally feel yucky. Isn’t this always the way – just as I’ve reached out to Nick again, I don’t feel like doing anything. I have been getting in the number of steps we agreed on. I’ve done okay at eating at least some healthy foods this past week. Usually I’m a “give me meat and starch and I’m a happy camper” type girl. But I’m trying, slowly, to add more fruits and veggies.

I did nothing that deserved a spanking and I didn’t get one. Strangely, I didn’t want one – I guess I really am sick. But I’m not going to let the momentum die. I’m sending Nick an email outlining how I did last week. He sent me two very motivating texts last week, which I truly enjoyed.

I’m also going to ask him a question – I don’t think he knows the answer, but I’m asking anyway. I’d like to know what, if anything, I do that really pisses him off. He’s already trying to help with the healthier lifestyle. And I know things like the laundry getting put away slowly bugs him, but I’m thinking of something else. Is there one thing he would truly like to spank the fire out of me for doing or not doing it. I don’t think he’ll be able to come up with anything, much less what I’m thinking.

The usual me

In stories and in real life women get spanked for lots of reasons – being disrespectful, their temper, their attitude, their language, trying to take control and many more. I don’t think that any of these are problems for us. But there is one thing I do that I hate and I wish I would stop. I don’t know if any of the rest of you do this or if your husbands would spank for it. Wait, I think Ella’s husband has spanked for it. But I’ll ask Nick and see if he knows, and after I give him his shot I’ll come back and tell you guys.

Please come by the Reading Room tomorrow for more questions and answers.

LOL Day and the release of Cassie's Life

Greetings! Normally I wouldn’t have put two such wonderful days together but that’s the way the stars have aligned. Love our Lurkers day and the release day for Cassie’s Life fell on the same day so this is a double celebration for me.

First to my silent readers – Thank you so much for coming by to read. You are truly welcomed whether you ever comment or not, but I would so love for you to come to the conversation. I’ve participated in every LOL Day since we began, twelve years now. I’m always proud to have new people stop by and say hello. I said this on our first or second LOL Day and it’s still true today:

One thing that kept me from commenting at first, was that I though all these people out here knew each other so well I didn’t want to intrude. They were all such good friends and I felt like an outsider. All I can say to that is - please come and play. We are all just a bunch of kids on a cyber playground and on this playground we really like newcomers! Here we can talk about our love for spanking, our desire for our guys to be dominant, to discuss the conflicting ideas and emotions that go with this particular desire. And swirling through all that we also discuss our kids, our jobs, laundry, the weather, our health, and the million of other things that friends talk about every day.

I would be honored to have any of you stick your toe in the water today and say hey!

And now another thing that makes me proud and happy is that Cassie’s Life is live on Amazon! This is the tenth in the Cassie Space series and I hope you all will read and if you do that you’ll get as much enjoyment from reading it as I got from writing it.

Amazon 

Blushing Books

Cassie is such a dear friend of mine. I love being able to continue her story for you all.

I hope to hear from you all today!