I have been a wife and mother for over twenty years. Now I am becoming my husband's lover, too.
We owe it all to my fellow bloggers who gave me the courage to come out to my husband as a spanko.
I do feel like this is a New Beginning for us.

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Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Looking back

HHNT! I have never participated in this before and I think we probably all know why. I have no wish to make the rest of you feel inferior or damage you self image by comparison! I am trying to be a true friend. ROFL!!

Strangely enough the weekend before our trip I found Nick sitting on the couch looking at an old book of slides. He took out a couple of pages and handed them to me. I held them to the light and couldn’t take my eyes off them. Memories from such a long time ago, such a very looooong time ago. We were dating and Nick was an amateur photographer. I kept staring, who was that beautiful, sexy, young girl?

There was such a conflict of emotions. The visual evidence of the passage of time startled me. Should I be sad at the less than flattering changes that have occurred over the past 25 years or be delighted to see we have evidence that I was a hot babe at one time? A couple of them I liked so much that if I were retired I think I would actually post them. But the risk isn’t worth it just to feed my vanity.

I asked Nick were he found the book, I probably hadn’t seen the pictures in 20 years. His answer made me gasp in horror – Mollie’s room, up on her shelf! Of courses she would have been much more likely to look at something she found in our room. If she had looked in it at all she probably got bored after the first few pages of scenery. But they are no longer being kept in her room. I promise won’t try to warp my children while they are still young, but when they are no longer living here I am having an 8 x10 of my favorite made to keep in our bedroom. I’ll let the future grandkids think grandma was hot stuff!


  1. No reason to be sad over change. It happens to us all. For better or worse, at least you have evidence that the babe inside, was once on the outside too!

  2. You're still hot stuff!!


  3. Obviously, Nick still sees the Babe, and likes it. That's what matters. D :)

  4. Of course Nick still sees the Babe Elis, we do that, us men.
    My Mel was the most beautiful woman in the world to me, that never changed, she was as scrumptious on her 50th birthday as she was on her 18th and wedding day. For me she is still the most beautiful woman, only not in the world.
    Love gives us eyes to see what others cannot.
    Warm hugs,

  5. As much as we would like too, we can never go back. Therefore we must celebrate who we are today.

    That's not to say we can't be proud of what we were. But to be sad would be a waste of time.


    p.s. I got the e-mail. Thanks!

  6. You ARE indeed even more beautiful now, dear Elis, for you have grown and loved and lived and learned and shared and taught and passed that all on to so many others... we are all blessed to bask in the rays of the beauty that pervades your every pore!!

    Hugs and love,

  7. Thanks everyone! I am happy with the person I am becoming. I still want to make some changes but I wouldn't trade what I have now for the best body in the world!