I’ve come here often enough over the years to point out Nick’s shortcomings when it pertains to TTWD. Seems like it’s time for me to take a look in the mirror myself.
Many times, I’ve asked Nick to make ‘rules,’ just a few. But something real or something he cares about. He’s sometimes done this. But then it seems we would often fall into a destructive pattern. I’d keep the rule for a while, usually the first time I’d break it or forget it he’d do a little spanking.
I’d get back on track until I or we, got busy or something distracted us. I’d ignore the ‘rule’ and he wouldn’t say much of anything and he didn’t spank me. I’d assume he hadn’t really cared about the rule in the first place and so I’d continue to ignore it and, it seemed, so would he. Eventually I’d come here and complain about Nick not taking things seriously.
Although we didn’t necessarily have this discussion, our thought and occasional comment came down to something like this.
Nick: I gave you a rule but you just blew it off.
PK: Well why didn’t you do something about it?
Nick: I did, but you kept on ignoring what I’d asked
you to do.
PK: Well, you should have spanked me again.
Nick: Well, you should have done as I asked to begin with.
Sigh, I never claimed to be submissive.
But it’s not even that. Submissive or not, if it’s reasonable (and Nick is always reasonable) I should be doing what he asks. Especially if I’ve asked him to make some rules to begin with. I shouldn’t use it to try to jerk him around. And I realize that often what I was trying to do. He may have realized it too.
Our TTWD often revolves around healthier lifestyle for me. Try to reduce my weight for medical reasons. He’s always been encouraging and hasn’t ever made me feel bad that I’m not the shape of a fashion model. My sister is on a weight loss program and is doing very well. She text me her progress up or down each Friday. Nick asked if I’d like to base my progress off hers. His suggestion is that I lose at least half of what she does or gain no more than half of what she may have gained. Very reasonable and it was fun to try to shadow her without her knowing. He said it was my responsibility to email him both my progress and hers weekly.
The first week I did and all was well. I’m pretty sure I did it the second week too. But not the third. He finally asked me about it on Monday and I told him I’d eventually found out that Sis was up two pounds and I was up one. He agreed that those numbers saved me from consequences and we let it go.
Or so I thought until Wednesday afternoon. When Nick came to me and said, “I’ve been thinking it over and…”
Come back tomorrow for Nick's thoughts.