I have been a wife and mother for over twenty years. Now I am becoming my husband's lover, too.
We owe it all to my fellow bloggers who gave me the courage to come out to my husband as a spanko.
I do feel like this is a New Beginning for us.

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Wednesday, January 21, 2009

A few loose ends

I want to say another word or two about Cassie. I won’t be discussing her here often but I do not want it to become an elephant in the room that everyone is tip-toeing around. There are just a few things that I want to be sure everyone knows.

The gratitude I have felt after reading my comments has been overwhelming and complete. Back in December when I was first discovered I knew/felt that I would be losing every friend I ever made out here. To say that I was devastated would be an understatement. I couldn’t eat, I was sick to my stomach for weeks. I was a mess. The guilt and embarrassment I felt was severe. But due to so much loving support I am letting go of the guilt and I am going to move on.

I need people to understand how Cassie felt about her friends. Please remember that when you made friends with Cassie or emailed her you were making friends and emailing a real person. I may have made up the Cassie persona but the feelings I had for the people that wrote were real feelings. I worry that some of you think I/she would receive an email and sat there laughing and thinking “Boy I fooled them good”. Nothing could be further from the truth. I started this with deception but I was fiercely protective of Cassie readers and her friendships. If you, in an email, told Cassie a secret it remained a secret. Obviously PK knew, but I never told one confidence that was shared with Cassie to anyone.

Many of Cassie’s stories I knew way before anyone had heard of a home computer (I’ve had over 40 years) but others just came to me. I never planned the stories out. It was more like I would hear a quiet chuckle in my head and Cassie would say ‘Oh my, you will never believe what happened to me!’ and the story would unfold. I never planned anything out and often she surprised me. I swear I did not know she was going to throw the ice bucket until it sailed across the room. For the last two months I haven’t let her spin her stories. But I feel she is still there. I don’t mind answering questions about her or anything you want to ask. Just shoot me an email.

I will be reopening ‘Cassie’s Space’ soon. I have a little house keeping to do first. I hope you will come by. Over there, Cassie will just be Cassie, a southern lady with a wonderful husband who spanks, loving neighbors, a beautiful dog, an old friend close by and a dear brother Paul on the internet. I hope you enjoy the adventures she has already shared. Comment on them if you like and she will probably answer. I hope she will have more stories to share in the future.

13 comments:

  1. Anonymous11:21 PM

    PK:
    I am sooo excited. I can't wait to see Cassie's Place again. I hope you will post again when her place is up and running and leave us a link for those of us who dont have the link for her anymore.
    I am so proud of you and how you have handled this whole situation. This is the best news I have heard all day.
    Take care
    {{{{{HUGS}}}}
    AG

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  2. Anonymous11:21 PM

    Pk,

    You're a true author. When "they" take over in your head and have their own lives.... means you have to write them out of your head. I know. I've been doing it for years and have nothing to show for it... you on the other hand! I'm in awe.

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  3. Anonymous2:14 AM

    Way to go girl!! It will be good to see Cassie open her house again. She had adventures that most of us would love to have but which, in this house at least, others would pitch a fit at!!!

    I'm glad you've been able to let go of all the negative feelings discovery created for you. Its been so lovely to read everyone's comments and support for you.

    love and hugs xxx

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  4. Good for you PK. You have handled this so well.
    You will have probably seen on some of our sites that Cassie is still there in our favourite blog roll waiting hoping she would come back. I'm glad and look foreward to popping over to her house when she opens up.

    Love to you PK, thank you.
    Ronnie
    xx

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  5. mmmmmmmmmm, I can't wait for Cassie's 'welcome I am back' party... that will be a happy day with me to much online I am afraid.. *smiles*

    it's wonderfull all those comments indeed...

    hugs, lessa

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  6. PK this is good news indeed.
    I heard about Cassie from Paul but the site was closed.
    Tink happy thoughts my friend.
    Hugs, Jay

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  7. I loved the stories and will read them again. The rest has already been said.

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  8. Anonymous10:15 AM

    I enjoyed Cassie's Place, and was concerned when it disappeared. I would welcome it back as a fiction site. I loved the stories.

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  9. PK, I'm very glad to have my sister back, Cassie was and is a delight.
    Love and warm hugs,
    Paul.

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  10. I am so glad you are going to re-open Cassie's Place. It has alot of wonderful stories there, I am sure Cassie still has a ton of stories to tell.

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  11. You know why I'm partial to Cassie's Space... that's one of loveliest templates I've ever created. It will be nice to visit it again.

    You've no idea how many times I've replayed your 'confession' call in my mind. You frightened me so much as you sobbed out your remorse, and gave voice to the fear that I would turn my back on you. I recall laughing because I was so relieved no one had died, which is what I thought when you first called. Several days later, it dawned on me... someone had died. That someone was Cassie.

    I'm so proud of you for finding the courage to admit all you did, and for deciding to bring that wonderful character back.

    I read a comment today about being able to tell who a person is by the friends they have. I agree wholeheartedly! My friends are creative, intelligent, loyal, caring, funny, spontaneous, protective, talented, and amazing... that must mean I am too!!!

    I love you.
    *hugs*
    CeeCi

    Wow, you became a great-auntie today!!

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  12. AG,
    I appreciate you support. I will email when the site opens.

    FunKayLynn,
    The stories have always been there I wanted to share them.

    M:e,
    Thank you. Every kind word sounds awfully good right now. Thanks for coming by.

    Ronnie,
    That means a lot to me.

    Lessa,
    I hope it will be a happy homecoming. Thank you for being here.

    Thank you for coming by Jay.

    John,
    Thank you.

    Impish 1,
    Thanks it will be identified as a fiction blog.

    Paul,
    I love her. You too friend.

    YaYa,
    I am really glad you like it. There are more stories. I hope they will be written.

    CeeCi,
    You are all those things!! And so much more. The site is the most beautiful one I have ever seen. Thank you for it.

    I am really excited about the baby.

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  13. I am glad...for Cassie's promise of a return...and for you for handling this situation with such grace...I am so glad you are now able to let go and feel better...I wish for you to be happy...

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