I will tell you there’s been a little talking, a little spanking, and some excellent loving. I sent him an email telling him I felt I’d made a mistake in asking him to stop our once a week deal, but I didn’t know how to take it back.
I asked him to go read the post Katie put up on her site, The List Concept
This is what I told him I needed from him:
What do I need from you?
- I’d love to reinstate the once a week – we can work on the timing. I love this for the reconnection.
- Work with me to have a few rules we can both be serious about. (I don’t do well with encouragement, offers of rewards, any of the usual things – but sometimes just telling myself I have to stick to the rule or there will be a serious/punishment spanking. It’s just something I do mentally, but if you’re there to enforce it’s been known to work.)
- Ask me how I’m feeling sometimes – it’s hard to open up and sometimes I do need an invitation. A little email or text would do.
I added one more, but that's between me and him!
And I gave him the follow promises:
- I won’t turn down a spanking unless I’m actually sick. (But as any self-respecting spanko would, I’ll balk, complain, tell you I don’t need/deserve one and mildly try to talk you out of it. It’s what we do.)
- I won’t forget First Weekend. (And sometimes some hot sex may follow some weekly sessions at your request or at mine, not all of them, but some.)
- If you really want me to I’ll try to communicate more. (You have asked for an email a week in the past. Think about what you want – that might me too much.)
I added, I love you – I’m excited and scared, but that’s better than being depressed and bored. We have no timetable, but at least we talking and thinking.
I hope we’ll do more talking – and doing it by email works fine for me. I know I communicate better that way. He did ask a few things about the ‘list’ and I hope he will ask more. I will never convince myself he wants to hear what I have to say and it does help when he tells me specifically to email him. I hope we won’t stop here.