I have been a wife and mother for over twenty years. Now I am becoming my husband's lover, too.
We owe it all to my fellow bloggers who gave me the courage to come out to my husband as a spanko.
I do feel like this is a New Beginning for us.

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Monday, January 16, 2017

About that talk with Nick...

I couldn’t make up my mind what I wanted to say. I mean, it’s been a decade we’ve been working at this, yet so many times it’s just gone. It’s so easy to get busy and let it go out of our lives. Nick is usually will to dole out a spanking because he knows I like it, but he’s never understood discipline as it is in my mind. That’s no fault of his, I don’t understand it either.

I hesitated to go to him for the hundredth time asking and trying to explain again. How to you convey the truth that for a born spanko TTWD is a need and not just a desire? It’s not like food and water where you’ll actually die without it. It’s more like sunshine – you can do without for a long time, but when it’s not in your life you’re not as healthy, you begin to feel dull and listless, your body yearns for it. It that way TTWD is truly a need for me.

The idea of talking with him stayed in my mind, but it’s an easy thing to put off, after all I’d put it off for the first twenty-three years we were married. I didn’t write out what I wanted to say as I usually do, I didn’t ask him to let me know when he had time for a discussion. I just decided, day after day, to talk to him ‘in a few days.’

So I guess you can imagine my surprise when he took my hand Friday morning and said, “I think we need to talk.” as he led me to the bedroom. “Go ahead and take off your clothes, you seem to listen better that way.” And while I was still stunned, he bent me over the bed and began spanking as he talked.

He said he knew it had been a long time since I’d had a real spanking. He’s well aware of how life gets in the way. But he’d picked the one thing in which I need his help more than any other. I don’t want Nick bossing me around, telling me what I can do, or when to do it or how much to spend or anything of that nature. I’m too old to listen about things that don’t really matter to us. But health issues – yes, I need his help, his dominance desperately!

While he spanked – hand spanking, stinging but not harsh – he pointed out that I’d stalled completely on the weight loss the doctor insisted was so important for my overall health and especially my diabetes.  He was right, after being frightened initially a year ago when I was diagnosed I lost fourteen pounds. Then I stopped trying. I haven’t gain those pounds back, but I haven’t lost any more.

Nick then set a goal – a very reasonable and doable goal. There is a firm dead line each month – with possible reminders along the way. But he told me if I just blow it off and he’s not seeing the effort there will be a paddling that’s not the fun, giggling kind we often dream of. He says it will be serious, because the health issue is serious.

*A note for newcomers, Nick is the most reasonable of men. He know that weigh loss often reaches a plateau and stops for a while. But he and I both know that’s not why I stopped losing, I stopped losing because I stopped trying. This also has nothing to do with how I look, this is for my health and nothing else.

Bless him, I hope he’s serious. I need the help I need the atmosphere of TTWD to keep me thinking and trying and being optimistic. I look forward to the short, sweet, stinging spankings that will remind me to pay attention. It feel like the sun is trying to peek out again.

The last things he told me to do that morning before he let me up was to plan on emailing him by Tuesday with ideas I felt would work for me on the weight loss front, things I was planning to do and not do that would jump start me in the right direction. I love it when he insist I email him. I mean, of course I can email him any time – but the idea of being told to email, told to tell him how I’m doing or what I’m thinking, that’s one of the most loving things he can do for me.

So you see I never got around to having that talk with Nick, he had one with me and that's so much better.

Friday, January 13, 2017

All good things must come to an end

Long, long ago a blogger known as Tiggr suggested to her friends in blogland that we each write a short spanking story and send them to her. She would then post one each week and let us guess which of our friends had written it. I hadn’t been blogging long and the idea scared me to death. I wanted to be part of it, but I’d never written fiction and I didn’t think I could. But not wanting to be left out I gave it a try, and who knew?  I could write fiction!

Tiggr kept this new idea, Fantasy Friday she called it, going for about a year. When she decided to leave blogging she offered the idea to me to see if I wanted to continue it. I told her no because I just didn’t think people would send me stories. But after giving it some thought I decided I wanted to try it. I changed it from a guessing game to just a place where the average person could write a story and have it posted.

I did have many people send stories – many of these people have since become some of my best friends ever! And there are still a handful of blogs that began by me pestering them to keep writing and join us.

But as the title said, all good things must come to an end and that time has come for Fantasy Friday. During 2016 I received only seven new stories – and thank you for those who did write for us, but it’s hard to fill fifty-two Friday’s with seven stories. I feel like I’ve done enough re-runs. I don’t want anyone to feel deprived so feel free to go back in my archives. I began hosting Fantasy Friday in October 2007 and I’ve only missed a Friday or two since then so it should be easy to find them.

Now it’s the every Friday I’m stopping – but I would never want to discourage anyone who has been thinking of writing a story, but just never got around to it. I will  be delighted to post any new stories I get. Occasionally I'll ask for stories and if I get any we'll have a ‘New Fantasy Friday’ post. So no one has missed a chance to write and I hope you’ll consider it. If you are willing to write for us send your story to elisspeaks@yahoo.com  I’d be happy to hear from you.

Wednesday, January 11, 2017

Great holiday and now...

I had a great Christmas, it came a little late, but it was wonderful. I always love having my kids home. But when everyone is here it’s always more chaotic – and that’s even before grandchildren. But I did get a special treat during this trip. The boys spent the first night at Colin’s parents’ home. I picked LJ up the next day about noon so that he could go to an early dinner with his grandparents. I suddenly found LJ and I at home – just the two of us for about four hours. It was wonderful.

Yeah, I know he's grown but...

We took our coffee and settled into my writing room with the gas logs and the Christmas tree and just talked. We talked for the full four hours and we hit a huge amount of topics: living in NYC, retirement, Hillary, that other person… we talked about Mollie and teaching, I got to understand more about his job, we talked of trips Nick and I want to take and trips that he and Colin want to take. We talked of issues important to the LGBTQ community and the issues concerning aging  baby boomers. I love my son so much and this was a really special afternoon.

The boys are back in New York, Mollie is back at work teaching, Nick’s back at work after the holidays and I’m left to find a new normal. I have to decide how to spend my day, how to divide my time. What a great problem to have! Once things seem normal again, and once Nick gets over his cold, I’d like to talk to him about TTWD again. It’s not that it’s unheard of around here but I’d still like to do some talking – just as soon as I know what I want to say. All is well, but I’d like it to be even better. I’ll let you know.

Friday, January 06, 2017

Fantasy Friday - My new book! Cal's Law

Yes I'm a little early, but I have a good reason -  I though Fantasy Friday would be a good way to tell you about the new book. (Since no one is sending me any stories.) It's finally live and I couldn't wait another minute!

Cal's Law is the beginning of a new series. (more Cassie books later) I have come to love this new couple and I hope you’ll be willing to get to know them too. Now you know where to spend those Amazon cards – I mean what else could you get from Amazon except books?

Blurb for Cal’s Law:

Jenny is the typical rich-kid, sorority girl. Getting good grades isn’t high on her priority list. In fact, that sits well below getting into the secret faction of her sorority. To do that she must pull off a daring bit of mischief.
Cal Bennett is the town sheriff. He’s a relatively young, no-nonsense, kind of guy – with a good heart. He is the moral center of this small town in North Carolina. But when his and Jenny’s paths cross unexpectedly, things get complicated and he questions his morals and his heart.
His plan to save Jenny from herself by enforcing strict discipline seems like a sound one.  To both of them. At first. He enacts a touch of martial law and Jenny agrees to learn more than English Lit. Cooking, cleaning, and laundry are but a few of her new subjects. Along with time-management, telling the truth and doing homework. Breaking any one in this new set of rules will result in a sound spanking. It all sounds simple enough when she signs on the dotted line of the contract between her and her sheriff.
But, life is messy and she is faced with one tough decision after another. She’s a college student! Shouldn’t life be easier than this? Less complicated? But she is pulled in two directions: her moral, upstanding sheriff leads her down one path, and a cute frat boy leads her down another. In one direction lies maturity, and a future. In the other, the simplicity of being a rich kid in college where Mommy and Daddy pay for everything. Now she must choose: Will she continue to let her parents pay for it all, or will she learn to pay the price for her own actions?

You can find Cal’s Law at:

And please, let me know what you think!

Tuesday, January 03, 2017

Slide puzzle anyone?

I’ve never been particularly good with puzzles. Especially difficult for me are slide puzzles. I just can’t seem to figure them out and now I’m in the middle of one that’s giving me a real headache.

We have a fairly small three bedroom home. I wouldn’t call either Nick or me true packrats, but we have more stuff than we need – that’s something I hope to work on soon. Meanwhile, I’ve moved out of a classroom I inhabited for twenty-eight years. Now I only brought home four boxes of ‘stuff’ and most retired teachers will tell you that’s good. But it’s still four boxes and they were shoved into the smaller of the two ‘guest’ rooms. As I cleaned for the holidays more and more ‘stuff’ got slid into the room. There was some things that had to be slid over into the larger guest room.

But now my boys are coming in for our Christmas on Friday and I need to slide the puzzle into another direction. Stuff must slide from their room somewhere and the full smaller guest room piece of the puzzle must slide somewhere too since Mollie will be occupying that one.

I love having all my kids here, I just wonder how quickly we can build on?

Friday, December 30, 2016

Fantasy Friday - A True Story

We've almost made it to 2017 folks! This year will defiantly be different for me and I'm excited to find out what is to come. This is the story I used last New Year but I think it's worth repeating.

I love every Fantasy Friday I’ve ever had the privilege of posting.  But this one, this one is very special to me.  For one thing it came from my friend Annie, who you all know is a fantastic writer.  It’s not your normal Fantasy Friday, but I have a feeling that so very many of us will relate.  This story is Annie, it’s me, and I have a feeling that it is so very many of us.  And if it’s not us then it truly is our fantasy.

Everyone please enjoy…


We all love those great stories where a bratty woman is tamed by her large, naturally dominant man. It is spanking fantasy at it's best. It also bears no resemblance to my life, or those of my friends who are "like" me. There are any number of men who have been convinced to do this by women like me. I have yet to hear of, much less meet, a converted vanilla spankee. So, without the normal pouting, eye batting, you can't do this to me fanfare here is a quick peek into my life. My real life.

After three days out of town I was happy to get home. Back to my pillow, my bed, my shower, my husband. Being middle aged makes me more appreciative of the routine, the comfort of my things, the luxury of living in a reasonably affluent, middle class, childfree American home. My days of spur of the moment trips, sleeping on floors and all night drives are over. Even flying takes it's toll on me now. I have reached that stage I used to snidely term "rigid" when it was my mother's turn. So, just back from visiting the grandbaby, feeling old and tired and, dammit, grandmotherly, I was not in the best of moods.

Most of you are middle aged, too, so you know what I mean when I say your children do not see you as a sexual being. Just because things are starting to sag does not mean we are beyond chasing each other naked through the house. Hell, we are both getting saggy, no reason to hide it. There is something about visiting my family, the veneer of respectability. The fact that we are still having a wildly erotic sex life never occurs to them. That tends to make me even grumpier.

I finally get my luggage, struggle to the drive up area, and there he is. He has driven the old car so I can smoke, has a dozen yellow roses in his hand, and my favorite chocolates on the dash. I know all of these, except maybe the flowers, are bad for me, and I do not care. He kisses me passionately, whisks me off to a quiet dinner in a restaurant that serves alcohol, listens to my baby tales over cocktails, and gives me the update on his week while we eat. My outlook has improved dramatically by the time the meal is over.

He carries my suitcase in, suggests I leave the unpacking for later and go grab a nice hot shower to unwind. Seems like excellent advice. My own shower, set the way I like it, my shower massage, my water filter, my water bill. After long minutes standing under the spray, easing the kinks out of my neck, I feel a sudden draft. He decided he missed me too much to wait any longer. How sweet. He washes my back, then, with noticeably more enthusiasm, washes my front.

This is all very nice, and I have missed him as well, but then he surprises me. While I am rinsing off he lands a good one on my wet ass with a plastic pancake turner he has snuck into the shower. Sliding an arm around my waist he peppers me with sharp cracks, all the while telling me that I am not ever to go off and leave him again. This thing is plastic but it packs a pretty good wallop, and the sting lingers on wet skin. What a rush. I know he has missed me, and he wants to get lucky every bit as much as I do, but this is all for me. He will try anything I can think of, but spanking is an acquired habit for him. He gets off on my reaction, but is not a natural spanko. For him to work so hard to please me is always a thrill, but this is above and beyond the call of duty.

When he finally releases me I am ready to be ravished, right there in the shower. Not the best of places for a woman my age, but this was urgent. He turned me down! Said I was going much too fast and he wasn't going to give me what I wanted until he was certain I had received all of the punishment I deserved. I almost came right then and there.

He turned the rest of the evening into a total production. It was fabulous and sexy. Just the right balance between pain and pleasure. And it was all for me. I loved every minute of it. I adore him for thinking of it. I swear I will remember this when he leaves his socks under the bed, the milk on the counter and the toilet seat up.

I do not know if we improve with age, take more time, are more considerate, or if he and I are just lucky, but it keeps getting better with each passing year. I do know that part of it is his willingness to grow, change, try new things, play new games. I am a very lucky woman.

So, no pouting, no pretending I don't like it, just an ordinary day in an ordinary life with an exceptional man.


Whether you leave a comment or not, I know this will make many of us think. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did.

I hope everyone had a great New Year’s celebration. I think a good resolution for everyone reading here is to try to write one fantasy story this year. Even if you have no intentions of sharing it with anyone, write it for yourself. And if you should want to share with us send it to elisspeaks@yahoo.com