I have been a wife and mother for over twenty years. Now I am becoming my husband's lover, too.
We owe it all to my fellow bloggers who gave me the courage to come out to my husband as a spanko.
I do feel like this is a New Beginning for us.

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Friday, June 14, 2019

Fantasy Friday revival - A Drive in the Country

Yes, Fantasy Friday is back - at least on a trial basis. I may not have as many pictures with it, but the stories are great.

Here's a Fantasy Friday written by my very first blogging friend, Eva. It was actually through strange twists and turns from this story, that I got the name PK . But that's a tale for another day. I hope you enjoy...



A Drive in the Country


The leaves were just beginning to turn. The air was cool. Crisp. Buses were running around picking up kids and taki
ng them to school.



The school year was well underway. My favorite thing to do when school is in session is to climb back into bed and steal an hour or two of sleep once the kids board the bus. Not this day though. This day, was about to be different than the rest had been so far this school year.

I knew he was planning to take the day off so that we could spend it together. I just didn’t know for sure what he had in mind. All I knew was that going back to bed was not an option. He told me I had 45 minutes to shower, dress casually, and meet him in the car.

When I got into the car he started the engine and put the car in reverse. As he began backing out of the drive he handed me a brown paper sack and said, “Here. Put this on.” I opened it and was not surprised to find the blindfold we often use when he wants to play with elements of surprise.

I put the blindfold on, wondering where he was taking me and why we didn’t just spend the day at home since the kids were in school. I tried to keep track of the twists and turns that the road took but after about ten minutes I was completely lost in the darkness of the blindfold.

As we drove he told me to remove my bra and even though I was wearing a long sleeved sweater that wasn’t a difficult accomplishment. Women can remove bras in the tightest of circumstance. And yes, even while blindfolded.

We drove a bit further and he told me to hold out my hand. I did. He placed something in my palm and said “Put them on.” It took me a second to figure out what I was holding. Never before have there been clamps on my nipples. Realizing he had bought them just for a moment like this, I thanked him for this gift as I put them on and felt their grip.

Throughout the rest of the trip he occasionally squeezed the nipple clamps sending throbbing sensations to my rapidly moistening sex. The pain in my nipples and the pleasure in my pussy made me whimper every time he touched me.

We drove on. And on. Finally, I sensed gravel under the wheels of the car. He must have driven another half mile. I could sense that we were on private property. Finally when the car stopped and the engine died he said “wait.” He got out of the car and came around and opened my door. He took my hand and instructed me to carefully get out of the car. The whole time he led me and warned me of bumps in the walkway and other obstacles.

We climbed four steps. I could tell we were now on a porch. I heard the creak of a swing and the sound of running water. The air smelled fresh and clean. I could tell we must be near a brook or stream. I held tightly to his arm.

And then I heard a person rise from the swing and approach us.

“Glad you kids could make it.” She sounded older.

“We’re happy to be here, isn’t that right honey?”

I hoped that question was rhetorical because I was too breathless to answer.

The lady then said “Right this way.”

I held tight and followed his lead, too nervous to do otherwise. I heard a door open and a light switch click on. A musty odor wafted into my nostrils. The lady said, “Be careful on those steps. I’ll be back in two hours to unlock the door.”

With that the door closed behind us and she was gone. My blindfold was removed so that I could see to go down the steps. “I want you to see EVERY thing that is about to happen to you, my love.”

At the bottom of the steps, he flipped another light switch and I gasped with excitement. It was a dungeon. A spanking, love-making, submissive dungeon.

He led me to a rack of outfits and chose a leather teddy, lace stockings and black boots with heels and told me to change right there before him. His eyes never left my body and I felt glorious sensations knowing he had arranged all this just for me.

There were crops. Floggers. Collars. Cock toys. Slings and swings. Paddles. Shackles. Spanking tables. We used them all. I spent the majority of the time on my knees pleasing him in whatever way he demanded. He pinched, pulled, teased. He did it all. We did it all.

At the end of the two hours we were both spent like never before. I had been spanked, teased, tormented, fucked and loved. I wanted to just stay on my knees at his feet doing only what he commanded me to do. I was not able to think for myself any longer. I didn’t want to think for myself. I was his and only able to think what he thought for me.

As we climbed the steps he stopped me, handed me the nipple clamps and said “Keep these on until I tell you to take them off.” Just then the door opened and I got my first look at the older lady. She was sweet. Motherly almost. As I began to become aware that I stood before her in leather gear I heard her ask my lover if he’d like to schedule a return appointment. As he slipped some cash into her hand he asked “How would two weeks from today work?”

As we were about to close the front door of the old farm house behind us, my lover then placed the blindfold back over my eyes and snarled softly in my ear, “Keep the blindfold on. You are to NEVER knew where our secret dungeon is located. Just make sure you change when we get home… before the bus drops off the kids.”

~o~


Thanks, Eve. If any of you would like to be a part of Fantasy Friday, we'd love to have you. Send your story to elisspeaks@yahoo.com

Thursday, June 13, 2019

If you've done this, tell me how to act

I’m losing a great neighbor. We’ve lived side by side for thirty-six years. She’s exactly two weeks older than me. I taught her child as she came through middle school. I taught her grandchildren. I just went to the baby shower for her first great-grand child. I sat with her when her daughter unexpectedly died when she was only thirty-two and I helped all I could  during her husband’s lingering death from cancer. I hate that she’s now moving, thought I do understand. 


Although she’s more fit than anyone I know, the house isn’t the best for anyone planning to grow old there. There is no bedroom or full bath on the ground floor and the yard take enormous upkeep. She wants a small one story home with a nice yard to putter in, but that won’t take up half her life. I get it. I just don’t like it.

But the house just sold and I have to deal with it. And it’s happening fast, she is to be out by July 1st. So I’m asking you all for advice. I want to know how to seem friendly without seeming pushy.

With the exception of my college years I’ve rarely moved. I never moved as a child and we’ve lived here since the day we married. I hope my next home will be the great beyond. So I’ve had little experience with new neighbors.

I’m asking those of you who have moved often, tell me what to do. I want to seem friendly, but not over eager. The way the house is situated, I’m their only real neighbor. Should I …

·     Leave them alone the first few day, or go introduce myself?
·     Should I bake something and take it over?
·     Tell them about the neighborhood, or keep my mouth shut? It's a nice neighborhood, I have no bad stories to share.
·     Just wave and leave them be?
·     Make them a welcome basket? I'm thinking about this so if I do, what should be in it?




I don't know anything about them and I'm already full of questions. I want to know about how old they are, do they have kids, are they from this general area or from far away. I do know enough not to bombard them with questions, but I am curious.


Go back and think about your last moving day – tell me what you wish the neighbors had done or not done.

Monday, June 10, 2019

Writing - TBT, part 3

This is the last part of my TBT from six years ago. If you haven't read part one and two you're welcome to look back. 

You all know I push for everyone to write fiction.  The reason I push for everyone to write a story is that I’m pretty confident that everyone has one.  We spankos daydream about this stuff.  Most of us have had these daydreams for years.  Our Fantasy Friday stories are these daydreams written out.



I think I should have said assignment 5 should have been think about writing fiction. Writing should be fun – creating those things you’ve dreamed and making them come alive should be something you enjoy doing.  I wouldn’t want this to be a chore for anyone.  If you want to try it, just write it for yourself.  There is no dead line for ‘turning it in’.  Just think about it.

Some have said that you’d like to write a Fantasy Friday but you worry about spelling, grammar, whatever… and just don’t think you can write.  Boy, are you going to fit right in!  I wrote the first story I cared about when I was 15 and made the mistake of turning it in to the teacher who assigned it.  She ripped it to pieces, figuratively.  I was devastated.  The next time I tried a story I cared about was thirty-four years later when I started blogging.  I look back at that first story I posted on my blog now and find tons of mistakes.  No one pointed out a single one, no one cares if I misspelled something, used quotation marks wrong or missed a comma.  They were reading the story and they seemed to like it fine.

I’m no editor (think math teacher, not English teacher) but if you should sent me something and I see a simple error I can correct I will. Some of my contributors are true writers most of us aren’t.  Cathy told me I could use her as an example.  Her writing style is very simple but some how her stories have touched me as much as any Fantasy Friday stories I’ve ever published, you can see one of her stories here.  

Please write your fantasy. Write if for yourself. If at some point you're willing to share it with us, send it to, elisspeaks.yahoo.com


~o~

Now, in 2019 I'll say - 

Since I don't post all the time anymore, I've been thinking of bringing Fantasy Friday back. Although I'd love it, I don't expect tons of new stories to pour in. But I will post every new story I'm sent. I used to go back and pick and choose which ones to repost, but I think I'll just go back to the beginning and start through them again. Anyway, it will be a free story to try and start your weekend off right. And hopefully someone will be inspired to write.

Friday, June 07, 2019

If I may continue - TBT, part 2

Here's the second part of my TBT, because it's just as true and relevant as it was when I first wrote it. I'll have the third and final one up on Monday.


Great, you're back! If you missed yesterdays post go here and read it first please. 

Now if you did assignment two from yesterday, then hopefully you did assignment one also.  Now that I hope you are realizing you belong here, your next assignments:

Assignment three: Talk to us.

You need to do some commenting.  If you never have before, it’s time to start.

I said yesterday that part of why I didn’t comment was that I felt that I had nothing to add; I’ll get back to this.  But another reason was fear. Were these bloggers real people, were they safe, were they going to try to lure me into some dark lifestyle I didn’t want?  The answers are simple: yes, yes, no. Could I really comment anonymously? Yes, but I think the best thing to do is to create second email account, password protected (from the kids) for your alter ego.  I began as Elis Corey (not my name) eventually I was renamed PK by some warped friends here.  I felt more comfortable with this email I used exclusively for commenting and eventually blogging. My suggestion is to come up with a name or something to go by rather than just being anonymous so we’ll know you’re the same person each time you come by.

Now about not feeling like you have anything to add – you do! When you just say ‘Hey, I like reading here.’ You have added your support. If you ask a question, you allow us to think and maybe eventually understand ourselves better.  If you tell us we’re lucky to have someone in our lives with whom we can share the spanking lifestyle, you help us remember how fortunate we are.  Nearly everyone out here answers his or her comments these days and this is the way we first began to know one another.

Assignment four: Think seriously about starting a blog of your own.

Now close your mouth and stop panicking.  You don’t have to start today, but think about it.  Here’s why. 

There are groups within our community.  Picture it like a large family that gets along well.  We all care about each other, we all love being together, would rally around anyone in times of trouble, ask and offer advice and enjoy hearing from anyone in the family.  But there are still groups within the family, the kids are outside playing, the teens are on their cells, maybe the pregnant woman and those with young kids are talking, the men are sleeping by the TV, and the women over fifty are singing the praise of the empty nest.


Umm... we're not all young and beautiful 
like these women, some of us look like me.

We have groups in blogland too.  Out here we have those who spank only for fun, for erotic reasons, many for discipline reasons and others who combine the three.  But a large group out here, maybe the largest, is not represented – those who would really love to be spanked, but have no one in their lives to do it, or are not yet comfortable asking their significant other to spank, or maybe they have asked and the other person just isn’t interested. I think some of you should be blogging – it may not change anything, but I think it feels better knowing that you are not alone.  By blogging, by being out here to rant, complain, wonder, guess, explore, ask, and discuss the lifestyle you will realize that you too have a group in this large family.  And knowing you are part of a large, supportive and loyal family seems to make everything better.

I know not everyone is going to want to begin a blog.  But some of you might so this is your official invitation. If you would consider this, you know you don’t have to blog every day.  But you would have a place – to share your feeling about everything.  I think over the years this blog has become my on going diary, my pensive, I have a place to store my thoughts and I love it.

And finally…

Assignment five:  Write spanking fiction.



No this isn’t just another plea for Fantasy Friday stories, don’t get me wrong, I’d surely take them, but you need to write for yourself.  You don’t have to post them at all, you can hide them under the mattress if you like.  But making up spanking stories got me through the first 49 years of life until I decided to ‘come out’ to Nick.  Nearly the first two years of Cassie's Space were all stories I'd had in my head through out my life.  It’s how I coped with being a spanko in a vanilla world.  And I really enjoyed it too – so much I’m still doing it.  So let your fantasy play out in your mind, expand and elaborate on it – it’s yours for goodness sakes.  Writing may soothe and ease your desires and it may give you the courage to come out to someone who might share your feelings, you never know.

This isn’t another Love our Lurkers day. I’m glad we have LOL Day, I do love my lurkers, but I hope that theses two posts will help some of you step out and really join us.  If you want to be spanked, if you have the desire to spank someone, if the whole idea of consensual adult spanking is often in your mind, you are part of the family and you will be most welcomed to talk with us any time. My email address is elisspeaks@yahoo.com






Thursday, June 06, 2019

An important post - TBT

This is a throw back Thursday that I could have written yesterday. It has to do with being a spanko, not with whether or not spanking is part of your current relationship. Maybe you've never been spanked, but have always dreamed of it. Maybe the spanking part of your relationship has died out. Either way, you're still one of us. So I hope you'll read this. 


I write all my post hoping all my readers will enjoy them and maybe think or laugh a little.  But today, and maybe for the next few post, I want to talk to a part of my reader that I’m afraid we often ignore.  One of my friends knows she inspired all these thoughts and that they are directed at her – but it also for many of my other readers.

I’d bet 99% of those of us out here, bloggers and readers, found ourselves here after looking up ‘spanking’ on the Internet, (back in my day all you could do was look up spanking in the dictionary and lust after the definition, but now I’m really showing my age.)  




I’m assuming that if you’re reading here you are a spanko – or have at least admitted to yourself that the idea of spanking or being spanked pulls at you whether you want it to or not.

Most of us blogging are being spanked, sometimes more than we’d like, sometimes less, but we’ve found some way to incorporate TTWD in our lives.  But that wasn’t true for me when I first found blogs.  At that time I had never had an adult spanking, Nick knew nothing about my desire and I wasn’t ever planning on telling him.  I loved what I was reading, was memorized, in fact.  But I certainly didn’t feel like I was a part of it.

I felt a lot like a kid with her face pressed against a candy store window watching the kids inside help themselves to all the delights I wanted. One part of me was happy for them, but I also felt a little jealous and left out.  

I had no one to spank me, no stories to relate, no misdeed that I could write about and speculate on what an appropriate punishment might be. I was not getting fun spankings, sexy spankings, punishment spanking, no one wanted to control (or protect) me. I felt couldn’t even comment on these thing with no experience to back it up. My feelings were, 'What could I say that was of any value or significance to these people who are actually living it?'

Bob said in an email the other day that as he began reading more and commenting some that he hadn’t realized what a close-knit community we really were. I love that we are seen in that way, but I don’t ever what my reader to feel like it’s an exclusive community.  If that were true we’d all go private and just talk to one another.  We have public blogs because we want other to feel comfortable joining the discussion. 

I reposted this on facebook the other day.  The LGBT community created it, but I think it applies for well for those of us in the spanko world as well.  This is the real reason I blog.



Now if you feel like you are in this group of readers (as I once was) I have several assignments for you.  I’ll just give the first two today (wish I could promise each of you a spanking if you don’t follow through, but…)

Assignment one: Reread this post.  Think about it. Realize that you are a part of us whether you let your voice be heard or not, and also realize that we will all be stronger if our community grows with the thoughts of all our members.

Assignment two: Come back tomorrow for your next assignment.

Tuesday, May 28, 2019

How do you decide?

All right all my wise and knowing DD friends, tell me this -  what happens when you and your well loved significant other,  can’t come to a mutual decision? Who ultimately should have the final say?



Nick and I are about to begin on a dark, perilous journey. We’re redecorating the living room. Redecorating is not good for our marriage. It’s the closest we ever come to fighting, mostly stony silence. I’m usually the one wanting change. As long as it functions as it’s supposed to, Nick would just as soon leave it alone.

We moved into the house Nick already owned when we married, so in my mind, deep down it his house. Now, I’m mostly over that, and we’ve made some lovely changes over the years. But my first desire for change was shot down so definitely that  it was nearly ten years into the marriage before I dared make another suggestion. 

When I first walked into his living room, when we were dating I wasn’t impressed. Worst of all were two huge mirrors over the fire place mantle – I hated them, they looked old fashion to me nearly forty years ago. They're still there!


It’s not that I’ve been complaining about them steadily all those years and Nick’s been refusing. I’ve just mentioned every few years, ‘We need to change the fire place wall.’ Or ‘I really don’t like the mirrors, their so old fashion looking.’ Nick simply let it wash over him. The mirrors weren’t bothering anything (but me), leave well enough alone, he seemed to say.

Now I finally have he go ahead to make the change – not enthusiastic agreement, mind you. More of a, ‘Sure, fine if you have to.” kind of thing. But I’ll take it. I showed him a picture of what I wanted, and he said it looked good to him. There’s more than that wall of course, isn’t there always? 

We’ll need to paint the rest of the room and hall and I want to put up crown molding and a nicer baseboard. This is where we come to our first major sticking point. One of us wants a natural wood tone for the trim and the other wants to have the crown molding and the baseboard painted to match the new bookcases that are being built. Truly it will look nice either way – I know that. But I think it will look way better my way and Nick feels the same about his way.



So who gets their way? How do we decide? Some would say that Nick as HOH should have the deciding vote. But we don’t have a DD relationship. Some would say that the wife should have the final decision on decorating the house (since I’ve had to wait thirty-eight years!) But that’s not necessarily fair either.

I wish this was a project we could enjoy doing together. But few of our decorating projects have felt that way to me. Because we have such a hard time communicating about such thing we each get an idea in our head of how it will look best and then it just seems to become adversarial. And I think whichever of us ‘win’ the other feels bullied into the decision. And to show you how long this crap sticks with me, I’m still hurt and disappointed that I didn’t get new carpet for the nursery. And I’m talking about LJ’s nursery – he’s thirty-one years old now! And I still remember that ugly, old, yellow carpet that was in his room and I’ve given myself a pain in my chest right now just writing about it.

So how would you handle this at your house? Seriously, I’d love suggestions.

Thursday, May 23, 2019

Now, about that time share…

I never told you about our beach trip. As Nick predicted, it was very nice. The accommodations we were given was not in any way fancy. But it wasn’t bad. We weren’t on the beach, but there was a nice pool and the place was clean and it was free – so I had no complaints.

We ate well! I got a Napoleon to bring back to the room the first night and I thought I’d died and gone to heaven. I do love them! 


The next day we did a little looking in a few store. I got a new base-ball cap and Nick a new shirt. Then we took a long walk on the beach. Nick got up each morning to see and take pictures of the sunrise – not me, I’ve already see one. We even played putt-putt for the first time since the kids were little.

Soon enough it was time to go to the dreaded time share showing. From the group of people we saw the time-share people were definitely going after the retired crowed. They called us old farts back one couple at a time to meet our salesman. Agreeable looking fellow. They served us pizza and soda. He asked us if we enjoyed traveling. I told him the truth – no. I’m perfectly happy at our home. But Nick told him we did some traveling.

Then we were off to see the places accommodations. They were really nice. I swear the baths were as large as our smallest bedroom here at home. Master had a king size bed, second bedroom had two double beds and then there was a pull out sofa. There was a lovely kitchen, new appliances, everything you’d need.



Outside were two pool, one with a lazy river. There were three restaurants on the grounds as well as a clubhouse with an indoor pool, a small gym and a lounge were you could play games and movies were shown in the evening.

As we went into a room to talk details the salesman explained to us how we could exchange our week there – a prime location, for two week somewhere else. We mentioned a few places we like, Williamsburg, VA for one. He tapped on his phone showing us that if we chose to go there we could book a week at one of their resorts for under $250 for an entire week. In addition to all that, we would be able to get between 30% and 50% off all airline tickets, hotels and rental cars worldwide.



The price for the two bedroom unit was honestly a good price. The yearly maintenance fee was reasonable and guaranteed not to rise more than 1% a year. Thinking that Mollie would love to have a place to bring all her friends at times I ask about their pet policy and he said it was easy to find pet friendly accommodation.

Nick and I shared a glance. It all didn’t sound all that bad. Even though Nick is working, his schedule is very flexible. We really can travel when we want. To be honest, it sounded like a pretty good deal. Why not?










Well, let me tell you why not. Every word the salesman told us was a bald-face lie! It’s extremely hard to get a reservation to any spot you want to go and never when you want to go. Also there are additional fees hidden throughout. See, on the weekend the ‘owners’ aren’t using them the company can rent them out for a fortune, and they already have your money.  Any discounts on air travel, hotels and rental cars must go through them so you don’t pick flight times or which hotel or probably what kind of car. That way you have no real idea if you’re getting a discount or not. The actual contract that we looked over did not guarantee that the maintenance would go up no more than 1% a year. And there was, in the contract, a strict no pet clause.

My overall advice – if you’re offered a free trip to listen to a time share proposal, go on. We got the free trip and several free meals. But make sure you look up reviews of the company so you have lots to throw back at the sales person and just make sure you last word is, NO!


Friday, May 17, 2019

Something EVERY spanko should have in their home

There are lots of things every spanko needs. Prevertibles in every room, implements and a secure place to store them, a ‘traditional’ spanking spot, thought anywhere is fine in a pinch. I think Velcro cuffs and a blindfold are essential. I imagine each of you could add to this list. But a friend, my lovely and helpful editor Rosie Dee, shared with me something her husband had ‘created’ just for her. 



 Nope, I'm not talking about these.

It was a picture. They'd had it for a while, but now it’s matted and framed and hanging in their bedroom. The picture took only seconds to make and at almost no cost. It’s ordinary enough, if people see it they might ponder why you have this particular picture up. But I believe kids, grandkids and the occasion friend could see it without ever guessing the significance of it. 

But we’d know the significance. We’d glance at it often. There’s a good chance it would be pointed out to us occasionally.

So tell me what you think. Imagine the picture below, customized by your own loving husband, beautifully matted and framed and hanging on your bedroom, bathroom or office wall. I like the idea!
















Tuesday, May 14, 2019

Blogging blockers

I’ve enjoyed blogging since I first discovered what blogs were. But being away from home for a while always throws me off my blogging endeavors. We had a good trip to the beach last week, but now that I’m back home, things happen to keep me away from the computer.

There was Mother’s Day, of course. That was fun. The boys sent me some lovely flowers. 


Mollie gave me a portable charger that I’d been wanting and together they gave us tickets to see my very favorite comedian Jennie Robertson. People if you haven’t seen this woman go to you-tube now and watch a few clips. You’ll be a fan for sure.

Then there was unpacking to do, which I hate.



The house is going to have to be cleaned and I see no cleaning fairies on the way.



A friend and I are going to lunch.



I’m retired so the better part of my week is visiting various doctor’s offices. There is nothing wrong with me, thank goodness, but evidently the doctors are in desperate need of my insurance co-pay. Yearly physical and mammogram await me this week. Eye doctor and dentist loom soon.



The pool needs to be opened.



Flowers need planting.



There are books to be read.



There are books to be written.



All these things may be what people sometime call, ‘real life.’ I’m not sure I approve. I’ll look into it, but I imagine I’ll be back to blogging before it can really take hold.

Monday, May 06, 2019

Living in Mayberry and other stuff

I often feel like I live in Mayberry. You know, with Andy, Opie and Aunt Bee. But I was very happy the other day to realize that Mollie’s little town is even more like it. She called me the other day as she got off school. I asked how her day had gone and she said, “Fine, the police only had to talk to me once.”



It seems that on routine patrol on Mollie’s street an officer saw her front door standing wide open, but her car was gone. The policeman stopped and checked behind the house but didn’t go inside the fence, where the two dogs were, to go up to look in the house.

He then called the school where Mollie works (we don’t know how he knew where she worked.) The conversation with the school secretary went something like this:

Officer: Hello, I need to speak with one of your teachers. I don’t know her name but she lives on In the middle of Nowhere Avenue. 

Sect: Hmm… I’m not sure who that is.

Officer: She’s the one with the golden retriever.

Sect: Oh! You’re talking about Maggie, that’s Mollie’s dog. I’ll ring her room.


They talked for a minute and Mollie realized that she had just pushed the door closed and then later put the dogs out the other door and forgot to firmly close and lock the front door. One of the dogs had evidently jumped on the door opening it. Mollie was able to run home, make a quick check through the house – the officer stayed while she checked she and was back at her school in  exactly six minutes. She said she was grateful that the police were so observant and she was most grateful that he didn’t go up to the open door and look in. She says that there was no doubt he would have assumed someone had gone in and ransacked the place! Unfortunately, she keeps house just like her mother.

As a mother I’m most grateful that the police notice such things and that he went to the trouble to track her down and got the situation corrected. Living in Mayberry isn’t so bad.

We had a small craft show in our town this weekend and I had a booth with my book marks and also a few of my Cassie paperbacks. I think I gained some real author credentials. When I would mention to folks my age and older that I wrote books, they would ask, 

“Can I get them at Barnes and Noble?”

“Umm… no, only on line.”

“But I can order the book on Amazon?”

“Well, no it’s an ebook. You know, for your Kindle.”

The next thing you know I was getting a half smile with an, “Oh, that’s nice.”

When they saw real book, I could tell they were truly impressed and I sold seven! Five to people I knew and two to a total stranger. Now that was a really great feeling.

One last thing – I was interviewed over at Becoming His – Beautifully His. My thanks to Jlynne. I think she did a lovely job. Please go by if you get the chance. Thanks!


Thursday, May 02, 2019

TBT - You're not going to be naked at your own wedding?

This post first appeared in 2009. A lot's changed since then. But I still remember and understand the feeling of fear I had then.


Do you ever worry about someone finding out about your spanko side? I know most of us worry at least a little. And I know for some the idea is extremely frightening and we try to hide it.



I know it was scary for me at first. I have changed a lot over the years I’ve been here. In real life I have told one close friend and my sister (Hell, mostly everyone I know on FB knows, because I'm trying to sell books!) Both of them had the same reaction – surprise, amusement, total acceptance and underlying it all a complete lack of understanding of what spanking really means in my life. And that’s fine. I don’t care if they understand all the underlying thought on submission and dominance. They just know I enjoy being spanked and that the ability to open up to Nick and have him accepting my kink has made us a much happier couple.

I’m never planning to share with my kids – at least while they are kids. Of course LJ is twenty-one. I have no reason or plans to tell him but if he found out I believe that for the 30 seconds or less he actually thought about it (that’s about as long as he thinks about anything unless I write it up as a play) he would be amused. Now Mollie on the other hand would probably be mortified, about the spanking and equally about the fact we still have sex at all. (Now, ten years later, both kids know and they reacted about as I'd suspected. But in truth, neither really care.) No one on my side of the family would care and where Nick’s family would probably be embarrassed if they found out I know them well enough to be sure that they would never say a word to us.

If I was found out at work I would certainly have to take the blog private and that would be sad. I don’t think I would lose my job after all these years. And the reason I think I would keep my job is because THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH THIS THING WE DO!

I look back in my blog and I can’t find one thing shocking in it. I have always been proud of a post I did that first year saying that we should not have to hide our kink, you can read it here if you are interested. All I’ve ever said is that I believe in consensual adult spanking. That I think it is sexy and that it makes me feel safe and protected. I have been married to the same man for twenty-six years and we have an active sex life that includes spanking. Sorry I can’t see anything wrong with any of this.

So while I know we don’t want to be found out I hope no one is ashamed of TTWD. Letting the spanko side of me out is the best thing I have ever done. It turned a hum-drum marriage into a strong, loving bond. It changed me from dreading sex to really looking forward to the time we can get the house alone. I am a much, much happier person. Being happier make me a better teacher, a better wife and a better mother. It was the catalysis in me losing forty pounds and it’s all tied up in my desire and goal to lose more. I wish our lifestyle could be discussed in the opened. Not to try to talk others into it but to encourage those who know that they have these tendencies to accept themselves and embrace what so many of us know works.

So what would I say if my ‘secret’ was to be discovered and I was confronted with it? Well, I remember an old episode from Star Trek, the Next Generation. In this show a woman from another
planet was getting ready to marry a man from Earth, a rather conservative man. Her grow daughter had her doubts because of their differences. The final straw came when the mother showed her daughter the wedding dress. In total shock the daughter looked at her mother in and asked in an incredulous voice, “Mother! You can’t mean you are not going to be naked at your own wedding!” The actress was so good at delivering that line I found myself shocked that the bride would be wearing clothes.

So if anyone should ever say to me, ‘You don’t mean your husband spanks you!” I’ll look at them with shock and concern and say, “Of course he does! Doesn’t yours?

Monday, April 29, 2019

No one expected this

Sunday was quite a day. Nick was off on a golf weekend. We normally go to church each Sunday, but I sometimes play hooky when Nick's away. Yesterday, I decided to go and Mollie, just home from her cruise, decided to come with me.

I’ve mentioned our minister before. Ann is a wonderful woman, intelligent, beautiful and somewhat sassy. She’s been at our church for five years now and I wrote about our first meeting here – go back and read that now if you have time.




She and her husband divorced when she came to us. He had said he’d come with her, but in the end chose not to. It was hard on her, but I feel it gave her lots of compassion. She was heart-broken when the Methodist church voted back in February not to allow gays full acceptance and membership. She herself, is very accepting, especially of LJ and Collin, and she is working to improved our church along those lines.

Sunday’s service was fine – very normal, until right at the end. She was giving the benediction when a man walked up the aisle. She halted, then froze as he stepped right up beside her. Turning to the congregation he said, “You may be seated.” Ann went down behind the podium, not even making it to the chair.

The man smiled and introduced himself as the pastor of the church about thirty minutes away. Then reaching down to help Ann stand, he told her, “Ann, you are absolutely the most beautiful woman in the world. I’ve known you for twenty years. It has been an honor and a privilege over the past few months to get to know you even better and,” he dropped to one knee, “I would be honored if you’d spend the rest of your life with me so I can get to know you even better.

After a pause, he said to her, “This is the part where you say something.”

Taking a deep breath, she proclaimed loudly, “Yes!”

We all applauded, absolutely thrilled for her. And her closest friend in the church – the one who knew all this was going to happen shouted, hallelujah!

I could see Ann was shaking, so overwhelmed. She turned to him and asked, “Can you do the benediction?” We all laughed a bit, few of us have ever seen Ann flustered.

He answered, “I’ll be happy to.”

Somehow that got me more than anything else. Ann’s a strong woman, all of us support her, but I’ve often worried that in her day to day life, no one really had her back. But this man does. You can feel it. Her simple request and his quick response of, ‘I’ll be happy to.’ let me know I could let go of this worry.  She has someone to talk to, someone who will listen. Someone who understands both the joys and problems of being a minister. She has someone to lean on – someone to love.

 It was a joyous Sunday morning.