Oh, the voices in my head

Today is Sunday – we’ll take Mollie back to school after lunch today and then the nest will be empty again. We usually come home and nap on Sunday afternoons. Today when we wake up we’ll be able to do anything we like. As a prelude Nick woke me up in an interesting way Saturday morning. The first thing he did was to slip a blindfold on me. He said “So you can still sleep.” That’s the only thing he said the whole time. Next he pulled back the covers and as I lay there in a half dream state he shaved the kitty. I really like that. Afterwards there was much rubbing and touching. Then I got my pussy spanked – not hard, but deliciously stinging and then some more fingering, and then he was gone. What a way to wake up! I see great potential now that we will have our privacy again. I’ll let you know more later, meanwhile here is the post I had for today. I’m afraid it’s very timely.

I have bunches of people living in my head. I have many friends out here that will confirm that. But two of the leading characters and been fighting this week. Let’s call them Badass and Wimpy. Some people have an angel and a devil sitting on their shoulder advising them in different directions, but it's Badass and Wimpy that whisper in my ear.

Badass is a hard core spanko – she can take anything! She wants to be spanked long and hard and ver y often. She’ll buy paddles and wooden spoons and straps and anything else that looks like it would give a serious spanking. When she gets in certain moods she like to taunt Nick, and eggs him on to spank more often and longer and harder. When she hasn’t been spanked in a long time she really starts pushing. Her memory for pain is nearly nonexistent.

Then there’s poor Wimpy. Wimpy’s memory for the pain of a spanking is extremely acute. She knows that after about two swats Badass will run for the hills and leave Wimpy to endure the rest of the spanking all by herself. Of course Badass may pop back if Nick asks a question like, “Have you had enough?” Both of these people will want to answer the question. I never really know who will get the answer out first.

Badass wants to say “Is that all you got? You hit like a girl, put some muscle in it for goodness sake. You’ve only been spanking 15 minutes – go take some vitamins!”

While Wimpy is trying to say, “Yes, yes! That’s plenty. Let’s do something else.”

All I know for sure is that whoever answers first the other one will be a little upset and disappointed. And since the both live in my head you see my dilemma. But even these two can agree on one thing. They want Nick to be the one in charge.

Sometimes in an effort to give me as much as I want – but not wanting to go too far and hurt me, Nick will tell me he’s going to spank until I tell him to stop. I understand his reasoning – all I can take and no more, but for me this defeats the purpose of a spanking. I want to give up control!!! I want to be able to tell him stop, that’s enough, please – and have him ignore me completely. Being able to tell him when to stop does nothing for my submissive side (which is my sexy side). Shoot as soon as it starts stinging Wimpy is ready to tell him to stop. I, and Badass agrees, want him to push the limits. I love that when Nick spanks he usually give me breaks, I appreciate that because it lets me accept more. Of course sometimes the rubbing takes over and he forgets to go back to the spanking as other things take over his mind, but still the breaks help me a lot. And it seems that although Badass is tough, Wimpy must talk louder, because as me – I’d say my spankings are too short most of the time. I’d like Nick to take a long time with the spanking. Shoot he could spank a while, go drink a beer, and come back for a few more rounds before going on to the main event. Owwwww… Wimpy just kicked me!

I like to think that taking a hard spanking is like running a marathon. You’ve got to be a little crazy to want to try it, when you’re in the middle of it you feel like you just can’t take any more, when it’s over you have a major sense of pride and accomplishment, and the achy soreness the next day is a wonderful reminder and a true badge of honor. I don’t know if I’m ready for a marathon or not, but I am ready to go into training!