Feeling better

I had forgotten how much I worried about LJ when he is home. The good new, Theresa, is that I hardly ever worried about him when he was away at school. Crazy isn’t it! When he is here I am always listening for him to come home, worrying if he is late, wishing he would call. Somehow when he is totally away from home I feel that God is always watching over him and protecting him. When he is here I feel God needs my help in accomplishing this task!

There is also the selfish side of this. We know Mollie’s schedule and when she is likely to be gone for a few hours. But LJ? He is rarely home but you never know when he might pop in. So I do share Eva’s dilemma about adult children at home. He does have enough sense not to walk into our bedroom when the door is shut but these days who’s to say we are going to be in the bedroom with the door closed? We may be feeling adventurous! Actually I feel we should make it a goal to make love or at the very least spank in every room of the house. I mean if we did it in my mother’s living room – truly no where should be off limits! And of course we have the new pool to christen this summer - after it gets warmer.

As Eva said in her post, summer cannot get here fast enough to suit me. Last summer was the most wonderful summer, the most wonderful time of my life. It was my first summer of freedom since 1975. How old do you think that makes me feel! I worked or went to college every summer until 1988 when LJ was born. Now the next dozen or so summers were lots of fun I got to spend them at home with my kids, it was wonderful but very kid oriented (as it should have been then). Then my parents began to need more help and I was glad to be there for them.

But suddenly last summer, after both my parents had passed away I realized that my kids mostly had there own agenda and I wasn’t particularly needed. I guess some mothers might have been hurt – I was thrilled. They were having fun and I had just discovered blogs. Maybe it was mom’s turn to have a little fun and freedom! Mom and dad were due a turn to get to know each other and boy did we take advantage of it! But in a strange way it contributed to my rough school year, I didn’t realize it at the time but I think I really resented having to give up that magical summer and return to school and maybe I stayed a little mad all year. I think I was always worried that everything was going to go away. It has taken a while to accept and believe that what Nick and I have now is real. But I do believe it, and I now know as long we want it we can keep it!