I have been a wife and mother for over twenty years. Now I am becoming my husband's lover, too.
We owe it all to my fellow bloggers who gave me the courage to come out to my husband as a spanko.
I do feel like this is a New Beginning for us.

You must be 18 to view this site.

Thursday, November 20, 2014

TBT - If you've EVER thought about Spanking, read this

I was wandering back looking for something for Throw back Thursday and when I came across this post I thought it would go well with what I was trying to say in my Love our Lurkers post. I'll put the second part up early next week. 


~~

I write all my post hoping all my readers will enjoy them and maybe think or laugh a little.  But today I want to talk to a part of my reader that I’m afraid we often ignore. Those who have found the community and know that they belong, but they are not in a spanking relationship.



I’d bet 99% of those of us out here, bloggers and readers, found ourselves here after looking up ‘spanking’ on the Internet, (back in my day all you could do was look up spanking in the dictionary and lust after the definition, but now I’m really showing my age.)  I’m assuming that if you’re reading here you are a spanko – or have at least admitted to yourself that the idea of spanking or being spanked pulls at you whether you want it to or not.

Most of us blogging are being spanked, sometimes more than we’d like, sometimes less, but we’ve found some way to incorporate TTWD in our lives.  But that wasn’t true for me when I first found blogs.  At that time I had never had an adult spanking, Nick knew nothing about my desire and I wasn’t ever planning on telling him.  I loved what I was reading, was memorized, in fact.  But I certainly didn’t feel like I was a part of it.

I felt a lot like a kid with her face pressed against a candy store window watching the kids inside help themselves to all the delights I wanted. One part of me was happy for them, but I also felt a little jealous and left out. 

I had no one to spank me, no stories to relate, no misdeed that I could write about and speculate on what an appropriate punishment might be. I was not getting fun spankings, sexy spankings, punishment spanking, no one wanted to control (or protect) me. I felt I couldn’t even comment on these thing with no experience to back it up. My feelings were, 'What could I say that was of any value or significance to these people who are actually living it?'

Bob said in an email the other day that as he began reading more and commenting some that he hadn’t realized what a close-knit community we really were. I love that we are seen in that way, but I don’t ever what my reader to feel like it’s an exclusive community.  If that were true we’d all go private and just talk to one another.  We have public blogs because we want other to feel comfortable joining the discussion.

I reposted this on facebook the other day.  The LGBT community created it, but I think it applies for well for those of us in the spanko world as well.  This is the real reason I blog.



Now if you feel like you are in this group of readers (as I once was) I have several assignments for you.  I’ll just give the first two today (wish I could promise each of you a spanking if you don’t follow through, but…)

Assignment one: Reread this post.  Think about it. Realize that you are a part of us whether you let your voice be heard or not, and also realize that we will all be stronger if our community grows with the thoughts of all our members.

Assignment two: Come back next week for your next assignment.

37 comments:

  1. I love this post PK...beautiful said. You definitely have a wonderful way with words.

    Hugs and blessings...
    Cat

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm not sure about that, but I thank you. I just talk like I was leaning over the back fence with my coffee talking to neighbors.

      Delete
  2. Really enjoying your TBR posts Pk. This is such an excellent post and many can relate. Thank you for re sharing this :)

    Hugs
    Roz

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Roz, I just know I would hate to think I could never have gotten to know all these great people if Nick had said no.

      Delete
  3. Hi PK!
    I've never written a comment on your blog before, so HELLO! I'm so moved to, as you write beautifully about those early, lonely days before spanking can become a reality. Fortunately for me, they are a few years behind me, but I had the longing all my life. Thank GOODNESS for the internet. As you say, it was a lot harder to connect before that. A few magazines bought in London were what my partner had years ago. I remember the first DVD I watched of a spanking and the feeling of my eyes bursting out on sticks. Riveting!
    It's wonderful that there is a community now, and I'm just getting to be part of it, I used to be on a forum, TTWD, which has shut down. I've really missed it. And so I've had the same feelings of beginning and not knowing if I belong all over again reading blogs and not knowing if I have anything to say.
    Thank you so much for your encouragement here. Your reaching out gives such a warm feeling inside.
    BB

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So glad you stopped by BB. I think all we spanko have felt that longing to talk about our desires but there is a natural reluctance to do so to our 'real life' friends. I knew even as a little kid that most wouldn't understand and I'd be thought of as strange. I just don't want anyone to have to feel that way forever when we're all here and so anxious to talk to newcomers as well as old friends.

      Delete
  4. Hi PK, great post, brings us all to a greater understanding of each other. maybe the very secretive nature of our thing is why we all become such good friends so quickly
    love Jan,xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think that's true Jan. I was so scared when I began - what was I getting into? But I'm so close to the people I've met here I've driven the 500 miles to visit Eva more than once as well as flying across the country twice. I never would have believed it!

      Delete
  5. Assignmet complete Mrs.PK! I don't comment anywhere often because of exactly what you've said. It's really an odd feeling knowing you belong, yet not belonging in the slightest. I'm so happy for you that you were able to get to a point where you're getting what you need.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm glad you stopped by Chickadee. My firm belief is that most spanko are born. If you're a spanko you ARE one of us whether you have any spanking in your life or not, and we need you to make your voice known

      Delete
  6. this is a great post and speaks to so many...once upon a time it was me and sometimes I can still relate...however, I know that we are all here with the same heart and I can visit anywhere and feel welcome whether our version of TTWD is the same or not...thanks :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Terps - you are the very one that made me write this post in the first place. I'm so glad you started blogging!

      Delete
  7. Anonymous9:27 AM

    Gosh PK this made me feel good! I am in a relationship with spanking but it's been so hard to jump in anyway. I'm trying to be brave enough to get around and really get involved this time instead of staying on the outside and wishing I could be a part. Thanks for the post! Clara

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are so welcomed here Clara, just read around and if something you read puts a comment in your mind, just share it with us. Don't forget to come back next week to read part two.

      Delete
  8. Love this post and it is so true. Lord knows I can't remember the last time I posted anything about personal spanking on my AR blog - there hasn't been any, yet I still feel connected to this community and always enjoy making new friends.

    I urge all of you to step up and don't feel intimidated to join our "group" you don't need an invitation, just step in and see what happens.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Absolutely! I met tons of friend through teaching - trust me we don't only talk about teaching. That's the way with my spanko friends, we can talk about everything INCLUDING spanking.

      Delete
  9. Many will relate to this.Excellent PK. Thank you.

    Love,
    Ronnie
    xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Ronnie, it's all true isn't it?

      Delete
  10. Anonymous10:42 AM

    PK,
    Wonderful thoughts here.
    Meredith

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Meredith. I just wish I had more time to visit.

      Delete
  11. I remember this post! I was browsing through your archive back before I started my blog and ran across this one. I love this community! :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm glad you're out here, Jan. For us it's such a good place. I know this community has given me courage.

      Delete
  12. I remember that time clearly. N wondering if i'd ever be in a ttwd relationship let alone have anything to write n share.

    As usual, this was so well written. Thank u for sharing it again!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Fondles, if I could have done anything different it would have been coming out earlier.

      Delete
  13. Anonymous1:15 PM

    This was such the perfect blog for me to find today. Thank you!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Quinn, I'm so glad you came by and commented. Maybe you were meant to find it today. I hope you'll come back for part two on Sunday or Monday.

      Delete
  14. Very wide words and I will be back to read the rest of the post. Thanks

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Do come back, I know you're already one of us, but I like hearing from you.

      Delete
  15. I feel so scattered lately because I'm so busy, however I feel so at home here! Your post speaks to me! I wish we could walk next door for a cuppa. This is however, the next best thing!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wouldn't it be great if we did like that close? It's one of the reason I like the Corbin's Bends books so well.

      Delete
  16. Hi again...just wanted to add thank-you for your encouragement to join the world of blogging...I was already a member of the community, but it helped me to open up in so many ways... :-) Hugs

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We need each other, that's for sure.

      Delete
  17. Jon MontanaVega12:26 PM

    Thank you PK.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for being here Jon.

      Delete
  18. What a great reminder and a welcoming way to reconnect. I have often felt in the past several months that I did not really have much to share that was relevant and not boring. Truth is... I have experienced some of the most chanes in my marriage over this past year. In the early stages of blogging , I so appreciated all of the support I received and gave me a sense of belonging. Truth is... I miss this community and the connection. And so with resolve, I pick myself back up, brush the dust off and resolve to resume blogging not just for myself but in the hopes it will help someone who is new to this.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Being out here and being a part of this community has changed who I am over the years and I like the changes. When I began I didn't ever expect I'd still be here over eight years later, but that's what happened. Please send me your link, I'd want to read what you have to share.

      Delete
  19. Not sure if you are ok with me leaving my link here, wasn't sure where to respond to. Link is: mysir,myforeverlove76.blogspot.com. I would welcome you to stop by and read a bit.

    ReplyDelete