I have been a wife and mother for over twenty years. Now I am becoming my husband's lover, too.
We owe it all to my fellow bloggers who gave me the courage to come out to my husband as a spanko.
I do feel like this is a New Beginning for us.

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Monday, January 21, 2013

To all my readers - an important post, part two


Great, you're back! If you missed yesterdays post go here and read it first please. 

Now if you did assignment two from yesterday, then hopefully you did assignment one also.  Now that I hope you are realizing you belong here, your next assignments:

Assignment three: Talk to us.

You need to do some commenting.  If you never have before, it’s time to start.

I said yesterday that part of why I didn’t comment was that I felt that I had nothing to add; I’ll get back to this.  But another reason was fear. Were these bloggers real people, were they safe, were they going to try to lure me into some dark lifestyle I didn’t want?  The answers are simple: yes, yes, no. Could I really comment anonymously? Yes, but I think the best thing to do is to create second email account, password protected (from the kids) for your alter ego.  I began as Elis Corey (not my name) eventually I was renamed PK by some warped friends here.  I felt more comfortable with this email I used exclusively for commenting and eventually blogging. My suggestion is to come up with a name or something to go by rather than just being anonymous so we’ll know you’re the same person each time you come by.

Now about not feeling like you have anything to add – you do! When you just say ‘Hey, I like reading here.’ You have added your support. If you ask a question, you allow us to think and maybe eventually understand ourselves better.  If you tell us we’re lucky to have someone in our lives with whom we can share the spanking lifestyle, you help us remember how fortunate we are.  Nearly everyone out here answers his or her comments these days and this is the way we first began to know one another.

Assignment four: Think seriously about starting a blog of your own.

Now close your mouth and stop panicking.  You don’t have to start today, but think about it.  Here’s why. 

There are groups within our community.  Picture it like a large family that gets along well.  We all care about each other, we all love being together, would rally around anyone in times of trouble, ask and offer advice and enjoy hearing from anyone in the family.  But there are still groups within the family, the kids are outside playing, the teens are on their cells, maybe the pregnant woman and those with young kids are talking, the men are sleeping by the TV, and the women over fifty are singing the praise of the empty nest.

We have groups in blogland too.  Out here we have those who spank only for fun, for erotic reasons, many for discipline reasons and others who combine the three.  But a large group out here, maybe the largest, is not represented – those who would really love to be spanked, but have no one in their lives to do it, or are not yet comfortable asking their significant other to spank, or maybe they have asked and the other person just isn’t interested. I think some of you should be blogging – it may not change anything, but I think it feels better knowing that you are not alone.  By blogging, by being out here to rant, complain, wonder, guess, explore, ask, and discuss the lifestyle you will realize that you too have a group in this large family.  And knowing you are part of a large, supportive and loyal family seems to make everything better.

I know not everyone is going to want to begin a blog.  But some of you might so this is your official invitation. If you would consider this, you know you don’t have to blog every day.  But you would have a place – to share your feeling about everything.  I think over the years this blog has become my on going diary, my pensive, I have a place to store my thoughts and I love it.

And finally…

Assignment five:  Write spanking fiction.

No this isn’t just another plea for Fantasy Friday stories, don’t get me wrong, I’d surely take them, but you need to write for yourself.  You don’t have to post them at all, you can hide them under the mattress if you like.  But making up spanking stories got me through the first 49 years of life until I decided to ‘come out’ to Nick.  Nearly the first two years of Cassie's Space were all stories I had made up in my head through out my life.  It’s how I coped with being a spanko in a vanilla world.  And I really enjoyed it too – so much I’m still doing it.  So let your fantasy play out in your mind, expand and elaborate on it – it’s yours for goodness sakes.  Writing may soothe and ease your desires and it may give you the courage to come out to someone who might share your feelings, you never know.

This isn’t another Love our Lurkers day. I’m glad we have LOL Day, I do love my lurkers, but I hope that theses two posts will help some of you step out and really join us.  If you want to be spanked, if you have the desire to spank someone, if the whole idea of consensual adult spanking is often in your mind, you are part of the family and you will be most welcomed to talk with us any time. My email address is elisspeaks@yahoo.com



38 comments:

  1. Eclipse1:54 AM

    Hello again, I'm back!
    This is a very good post, it's quite interesting to realize that other people have had (or have) similar feelings than you.
    I've read the "assignements", I'll do number three more often. I've thought about number four, especially after I realize I could leave a pretty long comment on someone else's blog (I make it in my mind haha) but it's like ok, I will write this ONE post and maybe that's all what I have! and it will be basically a lot of questions. I know questions are good, but too many questions? it could be boring I guess. And opinions, lots of opinions! when I don't have real experience and I'm afraid some people could think I'm being judgamental. Anyway I'll think about it hehe. And number five... I don't think I'm there yet but it's a good advice, spanking fiction or art, I like that too (some).
    And I'll keep reading your blog :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Eclipse,
      There are some folks blogging that are 'on topic' nearly every post. But there are so many of us who post about anything we like. I talk about my kids, my job, my weight, what ever I feel like talking about. Sure doesn't seem to bother anyone. Then a question or thought about spanking comes along and I write about that too. My blog! and I enjoy it.

      Delete
  2. Well I have fulfilled most of your assignments dear teacher. I have to tell you that in some ways I feel the most 'me' I have ever been since coming to this community. I wrote stories in my head and read every romance that had a spanking scene or threat I could find. I bet I could describe all the main stream books and spankings by heart!
    I remember how my hands sweat and my heart beat. The roar in my head took a while to clear the first time I commented.
    When I think about the world here and friends that have accepted me for who I am, I actually feel emotional.
    I always thought I was so strange, and now I am proud of my feelings. That is not to say I understand it all the time. I am still learning every day.
    I am not always on top of my game but I always read everyone I can.... Old and new bloggers alike.
    Even when I don't post for a while I am still writing in my head!
    If I can do it, Ms everyday 'unassuming' normal... No one should be afraid.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Minelle,
      You are a wonderful student! I think you are doing things exactly right. You comment and email with so many out here, increasing your friends. You've started your blog and you are writing fiction. And you DON'T blog every day and yet you are well know and very accepted our here. Everyone should be looking to you.

      Delete
  3. PK, these last 2 posts are brilliant. Everybody has a voice and nobody should feel they have nothing to add. Every comment touches us in some way. Since I started my bog I've been amazed at the level of support and encouragement I have received. It's also so great to know you are not alone and a great place to ask those questions and process your thoughts.

    Hmm, I guess I need to think about assignment 5 :)

    Hugs
    Roz

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Roz,
      When new people come by my blog it excites me and is one of the things that makes me want to keep blogging. And yes you need to think about writing!!

      Delete
  4. PK,

    Wonderful posts. I used to read 3-4 blogs written by ladies (Cassie was one of them) but never commented. Thought I had nothing to add but I did and the rest is history. This community means so much to me.

    Thank you PK.

    Love,
    Ronnie
    xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ronnie,
      Do you ever have something to add. I think I have envied you out here more than anyone. I love the relationship you and P share. The perfect mix of fun and discipline, I'm so glad you share with us.

      Delete
  5. PK,
    I wish that I had time to write a blog let alone spanking fiction.
    My wife gets worse and needs more of my time.
    I only read two or three blogs on a regular basis now.
    Love and warm hugs,
    Paul.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Paul,
      I'm so sorry that you wife is so ill and your time is taken up elsewhere. You have been so faithful to me and have added so much to blogland over the year. I owe you a lot.

      Delete
  6. Thanks for these posts, PK.

    I have a blog, but I don't post there often because for some reason I never feel...what's the word? Qualified? LOL I know that's crazy, but it's that insecurity in me that stops me in my tracks.

    I read all the blogs that I subscribe to a few times each week, and I always have an opinion or idea, but again that old feeling rises and I remain silent the majority of the time.

    For instance, yesterday I read the first post you made on this subject, and I was going to comment but I didn't. Why? Because I said to myself, "Well this doesn't really apply to you because you have a blog", etc..

    I'm laughing now as I type this because it's so nuts!

    My relationship is sometimes DD, sometimes not. We are into ttwd on many levels, but sometimes we go long periods of time with no spanking at all for various reasons. I always have this feeling while blogging that my relationship doesn't progress in that area as most others do and I stay silent.

    But anyways, thank you for these posts because it has given me a feeling that it's okay to be me here, in my less than perfect relationship. :-)

    Have a great day!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Stumblingchi,
      "My relationship is sometimes DD, sometimes not. We are into ttwd on many levels, but sometimes we go long periods of time with no spanking at all for various reasons. I always have this feeling while blogging that my relationship doesn't progress in that area as most others do and I stay silent."

      Do you realize that I could have written this myself - except for the staying silent part. None of us know how to do this 'right' we're all just trying and you never know what you might say that really helps someone else.

      Delete
  7. Anonymous8:54 AM

    I've been secretly thinking of writing something.. a story of course, but I'm short on time and slightly embarrassed! I have all these ideas in my head... but I'm too scared of poor spelling, grammar... all that. I get paranoid just thinking about it!
    *(sigh)*
    One day maybe?

    By the way - great posts! I love lurking here and love reading others stories.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Emi,
      I hope you'll keep writing and trying. Come back one more day and let me tell you my opinion of what you have to do for fiction writing.

      PS. You just left a comment to the worst speller in the world!

      Delete
  8. PK, thank you!!! Like Minelle I have done my homework. This is so good for folk out there who are nervous of making comments. I hope they will now do so. I have a story I'd love to send you but I'm very shy about it. It's probably so rubbish. Maybe if some of the others will write I can get up enough courage to send it. Minelle's story was lovely. I hope she writes some more.

    I've now got your email address which is a start. And I'll read all this out to Starman when he gets back from his business trip.

    Many hugs, Ami

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ami,
      Like I told Emi, I will say a little more about writing fiction tomorrow. If you are doing it it should be fun - never a chore! I hope Starman understands how much we would love to get to know both of you.

      Delete
  9. This was a great post and great assignments PK. I have done most of them, but I guess I need to work on that spanking fiction story. ;) Thank you for sharing and making everyone feel valued and important in our little community.

    Hugs,
    TL

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. TL,
      Thank you for coming and commenting on my site. People taking the time to talk to me makes me feel great.

      Delete
  10. To all of PK's newer readers, I hope you will follow her advice and blog and write stories. She encouraged me (twisted my arm!!) to start blogging over three years ago and it has been a rewarding experience that has led to making many friends in this community. Don't be shy. And don't worry what you're going to say. Just share you thoughts and you will find a very welcoming community. Welcome aboard.

    FD

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. FD,
      you make me sound like a big bully! LOL, I accept that. I know that writing and blogging has done wonderful things in your life and I'm so happy for you. I hope everyone listens to one of us.

      Delete
  11. Anonymous1:15 PM

    Well I have done two out of three done. How do I change Anonymous Bob to just Bob? As for blogging??????????????????

    Bob

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Bob,
      Now lets think about this now, you said your wife was into all this too. A husband and wife blog. Both of you posting, could be so very interesting!

      Delete
  12. Great work PK! I know how hard it is to take that plunge into commenting, then blogging, etc. I also know the many rewards, thanks for thinking of inviting and encouraging others to do so.
    hugs abby

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Abby,
      I just want to pay back to blogland everything it gave me. I what other who could enjoy it as much as I do to come on out and try.

      Delete
  13. PK, thanks. Once again you are leading the pack. Let me tell all you lurkers, this lady is relentless in getting you to come out. She urges and urges until you think 'What the heck, I might as well'. That's all it takes.

    If any of you have ever visited my blog you know it is titled correctly. I do a lot of aimless ramblings about everything and nothing and people come by and read. It will be the same with you once you start commenting and blogging. It's great fun and there are some wonderful people here in blogland.

    We welcome you with open arms. We love comments and new blogs to read.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sunny,
      That's why your blog is so much fun - fiction, stories of your real life, jokes - all for fun! It's great. So you really just started blogging to get me off your back, huh. LOL!

      Delete
    2. Well, not really, but you were persuasive. Glad you did. I gained some good friends and you are at the top of that list.

      Delete
  14. PK, I can do and I think I already do, 4 out of 5. I just can't seem to do #5. I don't know why. I almost majored in English (Journalism instead) and I have a great imagination. I just need a good editor who can help me out. Lol
    Funny that you should be discussing this. I was reading all the comments, from my last post, to my husband. He kept saying "who is that". And each commenter I could tell a little or a lot about them. And I just loved each and everyone of them.
    Blogland, in this spanking community, is the most welcoming and accepting place I have ever been a part of. I hope that your post encourages others who are interested to read, comment and start their own blog. My ttwd lifestyle has blossomed so much since I started my blog. The encouragement and support from others was awesome and reading about other people, I learned a lot about myself.
    Love ya!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Blondie,
      Ty sound like Nick when I first got out here. He really was interested in the people who had had a hand in changing his life. I'm always blogging in my head - mind blogging we used to call it. I think that keep us focused on our relationship and that can only help.

      Delete
  15. The first time I left a comment on any blog (anonymously), my fingers were shaking so bad I had to correct almost every word I typed. I received such welcoming and positive feedback to my comment that I took the plunge and created a blogger ID.

    I have met wonderful, supportive people here, many I consider friends. The rest, I just haven't gotten to know you yet. ;)

    There were times I wanted to share different thoughts, jokes, etc. with everyone so I took a deep breathe and started a blog. I just knew no one was going to like what I posted or even visit. Imagine my surprise when people started visiting and leaving lovely comments!

    Don't know if I will ever write any stories but completing 4 out of 5 assignments...80%...passing grade! teehee

    Thanks PK for encouraging everyone with these 2 posts and also for continuing to host FF.

    Blessings,
    Cat

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Cat,
      You are doing great, but what teacher would be happy with 80% when she want's a hundred. LOL! But I'm really glad you are blogging. And I'm glad you are making friends and enjoying it.

      Delete
  16. Another beautiful invitation, PK! Blogland has a very comfortable place for me for quite some time. I did feel awkward posting when JJ and I were only able to be together for bits at a time, but I never stopped writing the posts in my head. Blogging helps me to process our lifestyle and see where we are and it gives JJ a window into my mind that I often have difficult communicating verbally. I have written fiction, just haven't put it out there yet, so maybe it's time we give that a try soon. Thanks for your last two posts!

    Kady

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kady,
      Sounds like you're doing a lot of mind blogging too. It's how I process too and try to give Nick a window into my mind - I don't know if he always reads though. But we'll keep trying!

      Delete
  17. Just reading all the comments makes me feel so connected as many I could have written myself. I am so grateful for you and everyone in this wonderful community. I didn't want you to think I neglegted to return today to do my assignment. :-) I comment, and long ago I wrote a Fantasy Friday story, so that leaves me with one assignment to complete...I am still not confident about what I have to offer in a blog, but I want so much to be a part of this family and want to give back since I have received so much...so her it is...are you ready???
    visit me at www.terpsichoresplacetoshare.blogspot.com
    To send or not send...ok here it goes...no turning back now... :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Terps!
      You did it! Thank you, I bet you are really going to enjoy having a blog. You'll have a chance to talk to lots of people and that is so very important!

      Delete
  18. In the last couple months I've started leaving a few comments ... I thought it only fair because I've gotten so much out of what I've been reading. I'll try to do more of that. Not sure if I have much to share on a blog or the time, but will keep it in mind. Thank you so much for these posts!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Meg,
      I'm glad you have started commenting. That's how you can really begin meeting people. Blogging does take a lot of time, I admit that. But start mind blogging anyway - you might just be surprised how much you might have to say.

      Delete
  19. I have already done all the assignments, so actually no more reason to comment here.
    But then I would not have commented on this great post.
    Cannot let that happen!

    ReplyDelete