I have been a wife and mother for over twenty years. Now I am becoming my husband's lover, too.
We owe it all to my fellow bloggers who gave me the courage to come out to my husband as a spanko.
I do feel like this is a New Beginning for us.

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Wednesday, July 13, 2016


So many of us out here just don’t know how lucky we are. There are ups and downs in any TTWD relationship. But most of us have the option of talking with our guy and they have all been willing to try this lifestyle.

I recently received an email from a reader that pointed out what I know must be a problem for many blog readers. This reader asked what to do if one is a true spanko – one who has known about the need/desire for most of their life, yet there is no one in their life to spank them?

There are people not in any current relationship and there are people who have ask their significant other to spank, but their partner, for whatever reason, is just not going to do it. What can a person do if the desire is there, the longing for discipline and there is no one to fill it?

I’ve talked to people who just want to be spanked – often disciplined, but who aren’t looking for a love connection. A sort of business deal would suffice them at this time in their life, but again where do you look? I know some towns are going to have BDSM clubs, but really – do you just walk in off the street? Most all options I can think of are fraught with danger.

So on behalf of my readers who had the question – do any of you have any safe ideas of where someone not in a relationship could find someone to fulfil the need for spanking in their life?


  1. No idea at all, it must be so frustrating to always wonder. I wouldn't have a clue
    love Jan, xx

  2. Hi PK, I'm afraid I don't really have any inspiration either, other than online, Fetlife etc. Although, of course that does raise safety concerns.


  3. Sorry PK I can't add my 2 cents worth. Too many creeps out there now, so safety issues would be high on the list.
    Pity there is not a real life Corbin's Bend full of alpha males waiting for partners.
    Hope you are enjoying your holidays and summer weather.
    Hugs Lindy

  4. You are right about the lucky part. I have even thought about this very same situation. I don't really believe that a true discipline relationship could exist without the trust being present first.

    The reason that the spanking is effective is that I know it is being given by a man I love and who I know loves me. A man I want to please.

    A spanking relationship with a casual partner would be like having sex with a casual acquaintance. Pretty meaningless.

    Ella From the Heart

  5. Although I don't know for sure, I know there are clubs out there and also indidivuals who can be hired. Off the top of my head I think Spanking Minnesota http://spankingminnesota.blogspot.com/ might be able to help. I know there was a club in Tampa called Tampa Tanners and there were some who hired out. Just info I've gleaned from reading blogs over the years. Hope it helps.

  6. PK,
    This is a hard place to be and I have no advice here. Just sending thoughts and good wishes to that reader.

  7. Hi PK, :) Unfortunately I can't think of anything helpful. One might contact a high end store selling sexual/spanky things, and inquire from the staff. I am thinking of one in CA called Pleasure Island (I think that is the name). They might be able to steer one in the right direction. No matter the case, safety is key! All the best to your reader. Many hugs,

    <3 Katie

  8. It's a hard one PK. Maybe look up clubs in the area. Go to one just to see and introduce yourself. SG's right there used to be one in Tampa called Tampa Tanners. Not sure if they are still going.

    Wish I could help.