I have been a wife and mother for over twenty years. Now I am becoming my husband's lover, too.
We owe it all to my fellow bloggers who gave me the courage to come out to my husband as a spanko.
I do feel like this is a New Beginning for us.

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Wednesday, July 27, 2016

Changes

When I began my TTWD journey I decided I wanted an outward change, something I could see so that I knew it was real. I went from a curly perm to more natural, straight hair. I've felt that way again as I headed closer to retirement and to fulfilling the role of full time writer, my enjoyable – although not exactly lucrative – third career.

So as I’ve mentioned here before, I took a deep breath and stopped coloring my hair. First I just had her lighten the brown each time I went I didn’t want to look something like this. 



I wasn’t wild about this period – it looked blondish yellow but now the yellow’s all gone and I’m completely me. My color – nothing artificial and for me, I love it.

Two of my SIL, about my age, tell me they would never do that because they don’t want to look old. They are also the ones who were bitchy about LJ’s marriage and still think of him as the black sheep of the family, so who gives a flying f… what they think.

I think what I like the most is the feeling of freedom to do what I want to do.  I wanted to let it go natural and I did. I may decide tomorrow that I’d rather have it brown or red and if so, I’ll dye it again. I’ll probably get a purple streak in it – quite possibly before I go back to school this year. And if I decide to shave my head I’ll do it! Well, not really sure about that one because I have a feeling Nick would spank my ass every day until it grew back and he wouldn’t be kidding! But you get the idea.

Many of us, definitely me included, complain about getting older. There are aspects of the process that don’t thrill me, various aches and pains, a sag here and a budge there, not everything works exactly as it used to. But I am becoming a fan of other aspects of growing older – acceptance of who I am, the courage to say what I think, the security of a marriage that’s lasted for decades and the firm belief that Nick will be at my side for life and to have lived long enough to be able to bask in the love and respect of my grown children.

Acceptance, courage, security, love and respect – what more could I ask for at any age?

20 comments:

  1. Back at Christmas time I thought about it too but chickened out. Maybe next year but damn it you are right. There's much to be said for getting older. It's not the worst thing.

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    1. You only make a change when YOU want to make it. But for me it felt right!

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    2. It felt right just didn't look right. LOL

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  2. PK, I think you have hit on something here. With each year that passes, I care less and less what people think of me. In fact, lately I think about... so what if people knew about Sam and I and ttwd. If it happened and someone was horrible to me, would that really be such a big loss?

    Sometimes there just needs to be an outward change that signifies a larger life change. They seem to go hand in hand.

    And PK, you are loved and respected by a wide circle of people. You touch and enrich many lives. Glad mine is one of them.

    Ella

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    1. It's lovely to not worry about what others think, a true live and let live feeling. You are part of the group I love and respect too.

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  3. The important part of this post is that you're happy with your decisions, be it colouring or not colouring your hair or anything else. Ella is right, we get to a point in our lives when the need to please others just doesn't matter anymore. I say, Go For It! It's a good thing.

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    1. I did ask Nick his opinion and I made sure he was on board. And he's fine with it. So as long as we happy I guess we're the only one I worry about pleasing these days.

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  4. PK,
    You will reap the benefits of aging..... the freedom, the abundance of time, and many other things. It takes a while to settle into switching gears and that too is interesting. It really is charting your new course. When we stopped working early, my goal was to prepare for the freedom as seriously as I prepared for my working career. And here I am. You will do fine.
    Meredith

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    1. I'm a little worried about what I'll do when I retire. Write for sure, but I have to map out other things too. But I love having so many options!

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  5. Good on you PK :)
    My Sir wants to change my hair to a shorter choppy style but I can't let him do it yet. I'm not ready! I like it long and my hair is like my cover haha. Hopefully one day I will be ready to let Sir control my hair style

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    1. You're good to listen to his suggestion, but hair is very personal and you have to wait until it's what you want to do. I wouldn't have been happy if Nick had told me I had to stop coloring my hair.

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  6. Hi PK, I think it is great when we grow up and realize this is what we are, take us or leave us!
    love Jan, xx

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    Replies
    1. One of the very best things about aging!

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  7. Add in health and winning the lotto and you've got it made. lol

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Yeah that health thing is major - the lottery, I'm just not counting on.

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  8. A spanking every day for shaving your head?

    Hmmm, is there a downside?

    That is too weird. First Blogger eats two comments and now it posts with a Blogger profile I didn't know I had.

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    1. Well you do have a point about the spanking a day - but I still thing I'll keep a little hair just to play with.

      I'll take off the extra comment.

      Delete
  9. What you see is what you get so take me or leave me. That's what I say. As long as you are happy.

    You look great. so purple streak, try it and if not you can always change it.

    Love,
    Ronnie
    xx

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  10. I feel the older I get the more I don't worry about what others say. You have to do what feels right for you. No one else can say you need to do certain things. Good on you, I'm sure you look wonderful no matter what your hair style. Its what's inside that counts.
    Hugs Lindy

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  11. "Acceptance, courage, security, love and respect – what more could I ask for at any age?" you said it well. :-) I love your hair...it looks very nice on you. Do whatever makes you happy. :-) hugs

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