I have been a wife and mother for over twenty years. Now I am becoming my husband's lover, too.
We owe it all to my fellow bloggers who gave me the courage to come out to my husband as a spanko.
I do feel like this is a New Beginning for us.

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Sunday, February 10, 2013

Communication ... and that darn eggnog


I heard a short conversation on TV the other day that I realized echoed what I often feel.

It was Melanie’s character on Hot in Cleveland; she said, “People say that talking about your feelings is the most important part of a relationship.”

To which Victoria replied, “People don’t say that, women say that.  Lonely women whose men left them because they kept talking about their feelings.”

I’m afraid I’ll never feel, deep in the core of my being, that Nick really wants to know what I’m thinking and feeling most of the time.  But as I said in my last post we’re ‘talking more’.  He asked me to email him each week both to let him know what I’m thinking and feeling and to let him know how much I’ve stayed on the ‘healthier lifestyle’ goal.  So he can ‘decide what action should be taken.’ LOL, like the way he put that.

I’m going to try.  It works well when I’m in a good mood, not so much when I’m in the pulling away, distancing mode.  I hope he’ll make me stick with it.

And now on to discipline – have I mentioned I’m not the best housekeeper?  A while back Nick reminded me that I had a carton on eggnog in the back of the fridge that I needed to get rid of.  No problem, except I forgot, several times.  In our ‘communication’ this week he said,

Another point to mention.....again, empty the egg nog! Probably going to have to pay for that oversight, leave some time in your schedule for Sat afternoon.

Shoot! I quietly emptied and tossed it when I got home Friday and sent him a ‘What in the world are you talking about, I'm sure I got rid of that days ago.’ email, which he didn’t buy at all. He only emailed me again saying,

Then why is the carton still in the garbage?  What is the appropriate penalty for mistruths?  I'll ask Ronnie.

Why does he have to keep thinking Ronnie has the answers? Grrr… I dug myself in just a bit deeper when he ask me in person what Ronnie would say the penalty was for lying and I told him that I was forced to send our canes back to her because the UK had completely run out.

Whether he believe me or not, we really had a good time Saturday and thankfully he didn’t go looking for the canes.  What we did end up playing with were the blindfold, the cuffs, plugs, paddles, and various vibrators.  It was a lovely afternoon.

I’ll keep working on communication, exercise, and healthy eating.  Ronnie, you just watch for a package!

28 comments:

  1. Sounds as if the weekly emails are helping with communication and very happy to hear you had a lovely Saturday afternoon.

    Wondering if Ronnie will refuse the package with a 'return to sender'. :)

    Blessings,
    Cat

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Cat,
      Ronnie loves canes, surely she'll accept them. I'm hoping the emails work, they have in the past until I stop writing and he stops asking about them. But I'm going to try.

      Delete
  2. PK,
    communication is key, even white lies will block that channel, dangerous!
    Love and warm hugs,
    Paul.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Paul,
      You're right - of course in this case he knew I was teasing. But you're right about the white lies.

      Delete
  3. And you know what the answer is without asking me. By the way I forgot to tell you we've moved.

    Weekly emails sound good and your Saturday afternoon sounds wonderful.

    Love,
    Ronnie
    xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ronnie,
      What were you thinking the penalty should be for lying? I need P's email! I was a good Saturday.

      Delete
  4. Oh, what a shame you didn't drink that egg nog over the holidays. I love egg nog and have a half dozen half gallons frozen in the freezer so I can have one every couple of months before they stock them again next holiday season.

    And I guess it is me but I love to hear my good girl talk about her feelings. I want to know how she is feeling.

    And nice that you had such a good Saturday. BadAss must have been pleased.

    FD

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. FD,
      I'm the only one in the family that likes egg nog and it's not exactly on my diet plan.

      You have a special relationship, I think most spanko do listen more that the average man. But remember Nick is only a spanko by marriage!

      Delete
  5. It is my biggest wish to hear Lisa talk about her feelings. She just never does.
    Whenever I ask her to do that, she responds with: "what do you want me to say?"
    Doesn't work that way.
    I think Nick had better contact Ronnie's husband. Ronnie herself may give to high an estimate.
    Love,
    Bas

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Bas,
      Talking about your feelings is not an easy thing! Nick has had to tell me over and over that he really wants to know what I'm thinking (and deep down it's still not something I'm positive I believe). So keep asking, Lisa may just surprise you.

      I sure would like to get to talk to P myself!



      Delete
  6. Ronnie and those damn canes. Now Dee has them and she too is not too pleased with Ronnie.

    As for Nick, he has his hands full and I don't think he needs any advice. He just has to go with it. Lying, read my story tomorrow and see how that would work.

    Glad you had a great Saturday afternoon.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sunny,
      Canes should be outlawed - no doubt about it. Looking forward to reading your story tomorrow.

      Delete
  7. Hmmmm..... PK I love reading your blog!

    Funny, but as we speak (well type/read/whatwever!) I am drinking what you call 'eggnog' and I call 'advocaat'. The trouble is I'm on my sixth glass! I hardly drink more than a white wine spritzer so I am in trouble with a big T. Hopefully dinner will take away the effects somewhat, but I haven't finished cooking it yet!

    I love the description of your afternoon! (Well, except the cuffs because I get cramp in my legs and would be nervous of trying them!) I also identify with the use by dates of items in my fridge! I have to have a clear out every now and again. I am ashamed at how much gets thrown away. I must buy some new chickens so that they can consume anything with 'fur' on it!

    I still have a stumbling block over 'canes' and think that everyone is being mortally wounded by them. I think it must be because the nuns used to use them on our hands, and I have never gotten over the pain of it and being forced to write afterwards during lessons, as if nothing had ever happened. Yet a 'dark' part of me is intrigued. I'm also intrigued about trying out a 'switch', although my brain tries to fight off such stupid thoughts. Maybe I need to go lie down! The thought occurs to me that I could supply the spanking nation with 'willow switches'!

    Where is all this coming from?! I've completely lost it! It's the advocaat speaking! Not me at all!

    Many hugs,

    Ami

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ami!
      Now you've made me want some advocate, although usually the strongest thing I drink is Dr. Pepper, LOL!

      The afternoon was great - the cuff were only to keep me from reaching back but physiologically they are so much fun. Hate the cane of course but a switch over clothes - well sometimes that's not too bad.

      Delete
  8. I can see why you had leftover eggnog...don't like it myself (sorry, Florida Dom).

    Love,
    Hannah

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hannah,
      I love it! So thick and creamy. But I try not to drink too much.

      Delete
  9. Have some faith my firend, he told you he wanted to know. I know it's not as easy as it sounds, but try not to second guess him.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Faerie,
      You better believe its hard not to second guess. Yes a VERY hard habit to break.

      Delete
  10. LOL glad you had a good time and good luck

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tiffany,
      Thanks, it was so nice.

      Delete
  11. I'm so happy that your Saturday was "productive" I think any lies should be punishable with whatever you hate....LOL

    I love egg nog, but I think it is too rich for the alcohol benefits!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Minelle,
      Good Saturday, I'm still not wild about any of the implements at the moment.

      To be honest, I've never had alcohol in my egg nog - just not much of a drinker at all.

      Delete
  12. Keep writing, PK! If you have a day that you don't want to, may I recommend you turn it over to Badass?

    If you need some help, Dopp has offered...and she's across the ocean doing her best to aggravate Bas.
    Multi-tasking wench, she is.

    HUGS!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Rogue,
      Thanks Dopp for the offer, but leave her there bugging Bas. I'm just hoping Badass and Wimpy will work together to fight off the Evil Bitch.

      Delete
  13. HI PK, it sounds as though the emails are working well and that you are communicating better. It's great NIck wants you to keep him updated on what you're thinking and feeling.

    Glad you had a great fun Saturday afternoon :) Hmm, sounds like Ronnie's got a lot to answer for LoL

    Hugs,
    Roz

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Roz,
      I hope I will keep up with the emailing, I tend to be a bit lazy. But this is important.

      Delete
  14. Hi PK! He said he wants to know how you feel so trust that and keep talking. :-) So glad you had a pleasant Saturday. Hugs, Terps

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Terps,
      I'm trying to trust him!

      Delete