Weekend

I really enjoyed my weekend.  I wrote, I read, I walked, I sat outside in a beautiful garden, I had dinner with Mollie, I talked with Nick and LJ both on the phone.  It was really, really nice.  Sometimes I worry that my going off for a weekend like this will hurt Nick’s feelings.  I don’t think it does and I surely hope it doesn’t. 

This is why I like to take these weekends about once a year.  It’s like going back in time.  Before Nick and I were married I bought a house.  It was an old house and one of the bedroom had been cut in half to create a tiny bathroom.  I love that little half bedroom – it was large enough for an old sofa, my little spare black and white TV and a little heater.  It was my haven.

At that time I was in my early 20.  I dated a little, but I didn’t have a boyfriend and I wasn’t the least bit worried about that fact.  I felt sure I’d marry and have a family some day, but I wasn’t ready.  I had a home, and a job I liked at the vet hospital.  In that job, unlike teaching, once you left you had nothing to do until it was time to go back, no lesson plans, grading papers, no workshops. 

I just remember this as probably the most peaceful time of my life.  My parents were in their 50’s, healthy and active.  They didn’t need me; I had no husband or children who needed me for anything. My time was totally my own, there was no pressure.  On weekend I would go in my little spare bedroom with my chips, cookies, and soft drink (I was trying my best to reach a hundred pounds), a good book, and my beloved cat, Josie, and read, nap or watch TV all weekend. It was calm and tranquil, I didn’t think about insurance, job security, dealing with school issues – either as a teacher or a parent, I did worry about getting my kids through college and worry about them as they made their way through job hunts and new relationships. I look back on this as I look back almost a magical time.

Would I go back to that time if I could – not on your life!  I wouldn’t give up Nick, LJ and Mollie for anything in this world!  I love that I was able to care for my parents as they got older, I loved making a good marriage with Nick, I loved Mollie and LJ when they were little, as we trudged through the teen year, and now as they’re both nearly all grown up.  I love that Nick and I are still together and closer than ever as we restart our live as our kids are out of the nest.

No I wouldn’t go back for anything, but I’ll take a weekend of it – a weekend to let everyone take care of themselves and I’ll pretend all I need to do is eat (I finally did reach hundred pounds, lol), read, write, and nap.  Two days is plenty, but I’ll take it once a year.  It’s been great, but now I ready to head back to the real world with a smile on my face.