Fantasy Friday - The Nocturnal Banana Eater

Sorry this went up late - I have to blame operator error (me).

Happy Friday to all. I'm usually less busy than the average person, but this week has been unbelievable. Field trip as school sucked all my time not to mention energy. No time to rest this weekend, but I'm sure I'll survive.

In the middle of all this and getting ready to find a Fantasy Friday to repost, Lucy Appleby was kind enough to send me a brand new story for Fantasy. Bless your heart Lucy. It certainly came at a wonderful time. Now while the usually lazy me is very busy, I hope the rest of you will enjoy...

The Nocturnal Banana Eater

by flopsybunny/Lucy Appleby

"Will you stop fidgeting, woman!"

"I can't help it. I'm not tired."

"Well you should be tired. It's 2am."

"Think I'll get up."

"You will stay right here and go to sleep."

"Bugger."

"What did you say?"

"Sugar. A cup of tea with sugar. That's what I want."

"What you want is a bloody good spanking. But I'm too tired to give you one. So GO TO SLEEP."

*****

"Barry?"

"What now?"

"My foot itches."

"Damn it! Scratch your fekking foot then!"

"Ooooh. Yes. Yesssss. That's nice. That's better. You can't beat a good old scratch."

"Oh for heavens sake Sabrina - stop scratching now and GO TO SLEEP! We have to be up in a few hours."

"I can't stop scratching. It's made it worse. It itches like mad now. I think I must have been bitten. Bed bugs! Do you think we've got bed bugs?"

"No," said Barry crossly. He turned over, punched the pillow, and closed his eyes again.

"I can't sleep a wink knowing we've got bed bugs."

"Shut UP!"

"Auntie Nelly said if you have bed bugs, you should suck them up the hoover pipe. That gets rid of them. I shall do it now. You'll have to get up while I hoover the mattress."

"Bloody hell. I'm shattered, and here you are demanding to hoover imaginary bugs out of the mattress in the middle of the night! I've had enough of this nonsense," said Barry. He threw back the quilt, got out of bed and stomped downstairs, muttering obscenities under his breath.

Bleary eyed, he plonked himself down on a chair by the kitchen table, and listened to the wail of the hoover as Sabrina attacked the bed bugs. His eyelids were drooping again. He really was tired. Why he reached out and grabbed the biggest banana out of the fruit bowl he would never know, but grab it he did, and began to munch it slowly. This was one hell of a tasty banana. He savoured each mouthful, and when he had finished the banana, he helped himself to another one.

Fired with a sudden burst of energy, he stood up, his tiredness evaporated.  Vigorously he raced back upstairs and strode masterfully into the bedroom.

"All that hovering has worn me out," said Sabrina sleepily.

"All that banana chomping has filled me full of oomph! I'm raring to go."

"Well go to sleep," muttered Sabrina crossly. "We have to be up in a few hours."

"I'm not tired." Barry rummaged around in the drawer under the bed. He selected the big leather paddle with the red handle. "Look what I've got for you my dear."

"Put it away. I'm too tired for any hanky panky." Sabrina buried her head under the quilt.

"Tough," grinned Barry, and pounced.

*****

The next ten minutes were filled with splats and whacks and squeals of outrage and pain as Sabrina found herself on her tummy with her nightie bunched up round her waist, as Barry set about whopping her arse with the big leather paddle.

"What are you doing? OWWW!" she yelped.

"Just getting rid of the bed bugs. My method is far more effective than yours," declared Barry. "Oh look! There's another one of the sneaky little devils!"

"What? Where!!?"

"Right here. On your left buttock." 

Splat went the paddle.

"What do you know - there's another on your right buttock."

Splat went the paddle.

Sabrina kicked and wailed as the paddle did its job. Barry assured her he had got them all. Well perhaps not - there was another one on her left thigh.

Splat went the paddle.

They both slept remarkably soundly for the remainder of the night, Barry with a contented smile, secure in the knowledge that nocturnal banana eating payed dividends.

~o~

Thank you so much Lucy! Your timing was perfect and as usual you story was witty and fun. You are a real life saver. I could use a few more life savers as I get ready for the wedding and all the traveling it involves. If anyone has a story to share, please send it to elisspeaks@yahoo.com