I have been a wife and mother for over twenty years. Now I am becoming my husband's lover, too.
We owe it all to my fellow bloggers who gave me the courage to come out to my husband as a spanko.
I do feel like this is a New Beginning for us.

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Wednesday, January 10, 2007

What a day!

What a day! It started off normal got up, went to school, emailed Eva to complain about having to get up and go to school, the usually stuff. But then the day exploded. With out going into a lot of detail, the boss asked me to do some scheduling that is difficult and time consuming for me. I gave up good blogging time to work on the stupid thing and this morning I find out that a seventh grade teacher had made her own schedule (for this 6th grade teacher). And we are going with her schedule.

Mad doesn’t begin to cover it! This has happened before, being asked to some time consuming, tedious task just to have my work blown off (often by this same teacher). I am the calm one on the hall, so when I came in mad as hell and slamming doors (kids were not there yet) I think I got everyone’s attention. Several of my colleagues came in to off comfort and support and I was able to vent to them as they told me to calm down everything would be okay. Now I got my most practical help, however from Eva as we emailed back and forth suggestions like slashing tires, putting sugar in their gas tanks and one Eva had to tell me about – putting bologna on the car door car to mess up the paint! How I love having a friend who really knows just what to say!

This new schedule was to be discussed at a meeting but I saw the boss and told him I would not be at the meeting because obviously no one needed my input and I could read the schedule on my own. He asked me to meet in his office later and the teacher tried to explain to me in little words what she had done. Believe it or not I like this teacher but she has always made me feel inferior, stupid. I just don’t do well in face to face meetings. The “I’m stupid” washed over me so fast I just got up and walked out of he meeting and back to my room where I locked the door and cried for about 10 minutes. I emailed the boss, because for some reason I do so much better on email! Before my planning time was over the boss came over and apologized again and again. Wasn’t his fault, really all these feelings come from a time way before he came.

But the reason I am posting about all this is that you guys actually helped! Although the feeling of being stupid blindsided me for a minute I did not let the feeling hang around long. I could almost hear your encouragement. I know I can do many things that others can’t or don’t want to do. I can spend my days locked in a room with various 11 and 12 year olds and get the majority of them to understand fraction! I can take a dog or cat that has been in a fight and sew it back together good as new! How many people do you know that can do both.






During all this Eva was sending me calming pictures while encouraging me to “go on out and hurt someone”. And while we both knew it was all in fun it felt good to share those feeling!!!!! I even got to talk to her on the way home after she assured me that her phone was both water proof (in case I cried again) and shock proof too, thank goodness!

I went to the gym after school so Mollie got to give Nick the first version of the story. He let me tell him all again once I got home. Mollie was asleep so we got to do some kissing and hugging in the kitchen and finally, finally nothing that had happened at school mattered all that much. I have to remember school is a job. Being home with Nick and Mollie is my life. But thanks for being there guys.

8 comments:

  1. Anonymous5:47 AM

    So did ya get to see the looks on their faces when they found their vehicles??

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  2. This was a good post. I'm glad you did it. I'm with Eva, we need to do some damage here. Nothing's better than revenge.

    I think what would have pissed me off the most, is why did he even ask you to do it? Why were two people working on the same job. Arrggg see it even steams me!

    I especially loved the last part, about how Nick made it all go away. That's what I need. I beleive I could have survived the job that was consuming my life, if I had Will to go home to every night.

    Big Huggs
    Theresa

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  3. Anonymous8:59 AM

    I'm so glad to know you can feel our support and not let that "I'm stupid" voice take hold. You are anything but stupid, PK, for more reasons than the ones you mentioned.

    And you're right.. being home with Nick and Mollie is what's important.

    I hope today is less frustrating for you. *hugs*

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  4. I forgot to tell you. I love your pink hearts!

    Huggs
    Theresa

    ReplyDelete
  5. Dear PK, I'm so glad that you have Nick and Mollie to come home to.
    You are so not stupid, but you know that really.
    Yesterday was a day from hell, I hope that today was better.
    Love you PK.
    Warm hugs,
    Paul.

    ReplyDelete
  6. SuzQ said everything I was going to say! So I'll just add my ... glad you heard our support! And please, please! just lose the "I'm stupid" thought!! We're not buying it ;)

    Your next the last sentence says it all!
    ~Hugs!

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  7. PK? Whether purring or pissed?

    Yes, indeed!

    Stupid?

    Never, no way, no how, not even for a second. Don't let those nastards get you down, babe... you're heads and tails above the crowd and they aren't worth a moment of your frustration!

    How's that for using every over=used cliche in the book?

    And this may sound like yet another, but it, and all the rest, come straight from my fuzzy little heart to yours... love you, babe!
    Tiggs

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  8. Our support will always be here for ya! Hate when those type things happen. So lucky you have a family to come home to and your friends here! :-) I love the group here! So wonderful and understanding!

    Carye

    ReplyDelete