I have been a wife and mother for over twenty years. Now I am becoming my husband's lover, too.
We owe it all to my fellow bloggers who gave me the courage to come out to my husband as a spanko.
I do feel like this is a New Beginning for us.

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Thursday, August 03, 2006

Pool Time

We got to do more talking last night. We have a pool and although it is not completely secluded it’s private enough for quiet skinny dipping after dark. Being in the dark also makes talking easier. I had been out with the kids earlier and he had done a lot of reading on the different sites. I believe the boy has the idea for fun, erotic spankings down pat. All we need in that area is practice, practice and more practice! But we are doing great there and I have no complaints except not always being able to be spontaneous with kids around. He is even open to the idea of doing some toy shopping at a shop about 20 miles away. I really want to do this but this lifestyle would be extremely embarrassing if my employer found out. I work with a large number of people many of whom would recognize me before I would recognize them. But what the heck, I’m over 21 and its all legal. Who would have thought I might have it better than Cassie in one department!

Nick does seem to have some confusion over the idea of discipline and who can blame him. He said he can’t imagine a scenario where he would use this. Hearing that was disappointing for me but I completely understood it. We never fight. Never. None. We haven’t ever and I can’t believe we ever will. What do people fight about!? Some people fight over kids. I usually make the decisions about the raising of the children. I like that, and they are turning out well so Nick is content to leave this to me. Some people fight over money, we are not rich but we agree on money. We both like to save, we buy what we want but we are not extravagant. Some people argue about sex. Well I am sure that Nick has been disappointed with that in the past but neither of us has a complaint now! I took the role of peacemaker as a child and never got over it. So being bitchy is not in my nature. If I just went out – way out of my way to make him mad about something, as he put it he would probable be so mad that he would want to play.

I think the best I can hope for in this area is for Nick to help me play my mind game. So very much of this is in our heads anyway. I told him that I want to be able to stand in front of the candy machine at work and say to myself; if I don’t make goal this week Nick is going to bust my ass! I know that one thing that bugs him is when I leave laundry unfinished, left in the dryer or often in the basket not put away and eventually mingled with the dirty. If he occasionally spanked me for this (heaven help me not every time!) I would do better. Not because I feared a spanking if I didn’t do it – because of course we all love a good spanking – but because I would want to please him for doing this for me. Then maybe I could earn a good girl spanking! I know the poor man’s head is spinning but I think he is as happy as I am and I am living out my lifelong dream.

8 comments:

  1. Elis, Communication is the definite key in all this. And honestly, blogging helps as you already know. We're still finding our way too but that's half the fun!!!

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  2. Elis, it sounds good, keep on talking, don't push, you've plenty of time.
    If you want to buy toys and you are worried about being recognised, buy online.
    If you ever feel the real need to be punished you'll be able to work it out, you both sound like very level headed people to me.
    Hugs,
    Paul.

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  3. Elis-
    I can't believe you get to go shopping before me! No fair!! It sounds like your husband is a wonderful man. If he is this accepting while he is this new, in time you will get all!

    Love, Cassie

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  4. Oh yes, the ever present fear of discovery. Are you thinking you have to go to an adult store for toys? Really, you should, it's great fun and if you run into someone you know, well, what the heck are they doing there?

    Your posts are wonderful. Watching this part of your life unfold with love and acceptance is marvelous. Keep talking, keep dreaming. You're both doing great!!

    **Big Hugs**

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  5. Hi - new to your blog, wanted to say hi :)

    HI!

    I wanna pool, dammit. *grin*

    Lady Calliah

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  6. Eva- communication may be the death of me yet.

    Paul- I've been looking on line and I think that's where we will go.

    Cassie-I liked the idea that someone gave you about on line ordering with a money order, look into it.

    Ceeci-the joke here in the South is that the difference between a Baptist and a Methodist is that the Methodist will speak to you in the liqueur store! Think the same works for this?

    Lady Calliah - Welcome! Please stop by and chat anytime. The pool really is nice!!!!!

    Elis

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  7. Bsaically communication is the key. The relationship I did have where D/s was apart of we rarely if ever argued, or fought. Although there were rules and such. She had a 13 year old. So really when she was around we were "vanilla" and when she was away it was more kink. It was fun and great.

    Take care and just remember to talk, and talk openly. Have to be able to say anything and everything. including the bad.

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  8. Did Nick ever spank you for the laundry? i think if you told him it would motivate you to do better he would. But then you would do better and there would be no reasons for spankings. You got any other bad habits?

    Huggs
    Theresa

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