I have been a wife and mother for over twenty years. Now I am becoming my husband's lover, too.
We owe it all to my fellow bloggers who gave me the courage to come out to my husband as a spanko.
I do feel like this is a New Beginning for us.

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Sunday, March 01, 2009

QUESTIONS THAT HAUNT ME



How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

What disease did cured ham actually have?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?

Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.

Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

20 comments:

  1. "If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?"

    I'd say that in the very recent past, that question was answered perfectly.

    "What disease did cured ham actually have?"

    Um, swine flu?

    Thanks for the chuckles, this was cute.

    *hugs*
    CeeCi

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  2. PK -
    I almost wet myself when I read the "morality from morons" line...and CeeCi, you are absolutely right-recent events have proven this statement to be quite correct...
    Thanks for making my morning...

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  3. lol. nice one PK.
    I know the answer about the dog one though.
    When you blow in a dogs face you are actually blowing carbon dioxide at them (and what you just ate). When they stick their head out the window they are getting fresh air instead of that recycled air that lingers inside the car.

    I got a scary fact and a question for you. Fact first.

    When you were allowed to smoke in areoplanes the air was cleaner because they changed it every 20 minutes.
    Now that smoking is banned when you fly the air is only changed once and hour, it gets recycled 3 times which is why people catch so many illnesses on planes.

    How does a Ferrett (small pole cat like mammel)help to build a plane?
    The engineers used them to run the cables through out the plane!

    Thanks for the laugh :-)
    Hugs, Jay

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  4. Pk,
    That was very cute and Yes I did sing both songs trying to see if they had the saame tune.=-)

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  5. CeeCi,Fanny,
    You two are wickedly funny and I do love you!!

    Jay,
    That makes sense about the dog. I don't mind using Ferrets to help build the planes but I sure wish they would change the air more often.

    Yaya,
    LOL! I knew I would get someone!

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  6. Anonymous9:16 PM

    This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  7. LOL! Glad to know everyone is still reading.

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  8. Ah yes, the questions of the ancients... many of which will forever go unanswered in a meaningful way.

    Hugs,
    Marcus

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  9. Those were original? Too cute! Can we expect to see you on the next season of Last Comic Standing? You'll be the only contestant avoiding hard chairs for sitting!
    -Jess

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  10. Marcus,
    Oh well. They may never be answered but it never stops us from being curious.

    Jess,
    Original? Who me? Nope these have been kicking around the internet forever but I did like them. Thanks for coming by.

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  11. very fun! I knew the one about the songs...I sing them almost every day! :-) Hugs, Terps

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  12. Hi PK:
    Well I'd like to put my 2 cents in and say; That was HYSTERICAL! And a quick thanks to CeeCi for the Swine Flu answer... actually both of her answers too too funny...best laugh I've had in a long time.
    Take care
    AG

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  13. Hey PK, great, thanks for this, just what the doctor ordered for this Monday morning.

    CeeCi'swine flu and morality too funny
    Ronnie
    xx

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  14. Anonymous7:21 AM

    Pk,
    I think you must have offended someone with your moron comment. Somebody must have been feeling guilty. Will you please do all of us a favor and delete that anonymous comment.

    Ciara

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  15. Terps,
    Your kids are at the right age for these songs!

    AG,
    CeeCi is the very best!

    Anon,
    If you are not a moron then we were not talking about you. Only you would know.

    Ciara,
    No problem! I removed the first one last night. Most of my readers are smart, funny and accepting. There had to be one moron out there! LOL! Thanks for coming by.

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  16. Ronnie,
    Thanks. They are old jokes but sometimes they are the best. Thanks for coming by.

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  17. Wow PK, did I offend someone with my responses? I was thinking about the Bush Administration when I answered the first one. I guess I should have made that crystal clear. And if the offense was taken to the second answer... I know pigs can't fly, so I figured they can't type either.

    Oh well, it was all in fun and that was how I meant it.

    *hugs*
    CeeCi

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  18. PK, brilliant and thanks for a bit of fun. I did sing both songs at the end as well!!

    Hugs
    Mina

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  19. PK -

    Thank you for a good laugh. I really needed it today.

    Hugs,

    Jen

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  20. CeeCi,
    Thank you for making that clear. Duck, I think I see a pig coming in for a landing!

    Hey Mina,
    It's hard not to isn't it?

    Jen,
    I appreciate you coming by tonight. I coudl use a laugh myself right about now.

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