Ups and downs

I was busy at the end of last week. Mollie and I took off for her college for orientation. I believe the place she chose is the most beautiful campus I’ve ever seen. The weather was the best we could have ask for too, but to tell you the truth all I heard was ‘talk to your student about avoiding alcohol and drugs.’ As far as I’m concerned if you’ve waited to have that conversation until they are headed off to college, you’re nearly 18 years too late! However, Mollie and I had a great time and I came home exhausted Friday afternoon.

Not long after we got home I tried to have a conversation with Nick about my diet-exercise-healthy weight thing. It’s didn’t go so well. I mentioned that I owed several months at the gym and if I decided to continue there it was going to cost. I added that I really didn’t want to go. I was really hoping for some direction - who am I trying to kid – I was looking for an order. Either ‘you’re going back’ or ‘if you’re not going to go you have to do this and this’ and so on. All I got was ‘you probably should’ and then he said something about ‘You’ll have to make a plan’ and that was all. I felt depressed and lonely.

I wrote a post. I was angry, disappointed, hurt and confused. I didn’t want to post it but I wanted to write it. I still wanted someone to read it and give me a little sympathy. I sent it to Rogue and she gave both sympathy and some dastardly advice on how to get spanked. LOL both were highly appreciated!

I went to bed feeling depressed but waking up was better. Nick woke me before 7:30. He said if we went early we could go around our walking park a few times before it got hot. I was still feeling a little hurt and keeping my eyes closed I said “You told me I was on my own and to make my own plan.”

Nick said “That’s not what I said, I said you needed to make a plan and this morning your plan is to go walking.” He then started swatting my butt with a wooden incense holder he found on the dresser. That thing stung more than you would think it would. Anyway we went walking. We still didn’t talk much about where we were and what I should be doing, but it was a step in the right direction.

Later I got an email with some suggestion of things we could do later today. One suggestion was a ‘talk’ about my progress, or lack of. We’ll see what happens.