Fraying at the edges OR in the ‘Nick’ of time

I’ve been paying attention this time. I can feel myself beginning to fray at the edge. We haven’t had much time for each other or spanking lately. It’s because I’ve been sick and Mollie’s been around more than normal. Neither of these things was in our control. Nick has been very good about sending rules each week but as I’ve been getting over the cold he has given them a more general wording. I think in trying not to push me too hard as I recovered he reverted to things like ‘You should try to …’ or ‘think about doing…’ and not the ‘Do this…’ or ‘Do not do that…’ that really seems to give me something concrete to hold onto.

I can feel my lack of interest in the diet, I do more snacking at school, I find myself become more irritated by things going on at work. My ‘boss’ (who annoys me enough for multiple blog entries if I wanted to give the fool that much attention) has been more bothersome that usual. When I get mad at school I find myself hitting my friends up for their chocolate stashes.

When we have to go so long between spanking whether because I’m sick or for lack of privacy then my mind wanders. I think a lot – not necessary productively, but a lot. I need to have something to think about. Now if my choices are thinking about ways my boss is irritating me or whether or not Nick is going to spank my ass when I get home then there's no contest. But if there are no hard rules to think about little chance of being spanked then my mind wanders to the more mundane. I think more about work irritation and less about Nick and me or healthy living.

Nick has been trying. He has sent rules every week and he has sent a couple of delightfully threatening emails. But there has just been no time to follow through. HOWEVER, today… today he got my attention. No spanking, it was just a little thing, but it made me smile. I forgot to go by the store after work today I needed some creamer (my buddy Eva finally got me hooked on coffee at the age of 53) so I decided to head to the store. Nick said “Are you really going to the store? You’re such an addict you can’t wait until tomorrow? Alright go on, but it you’re going you have to go commando.”

What?

“You what me to …” I wasn’t quite grasping this.

“You heard me.”

I couldn’t help grinning. Nick grinned back. “It might just keep you thinking like you’re supposed to.” He told me.

I wasn’t sure exactly what to say but I knew what to do. Headed to the store wearing no underwear felt … unusual. Oh but it gave me something to think about!! I have made trips to the store that included a donut or candy bar that didn’t get mentioned at home. This would have been the type of day where that could have happened. But it didn’t. My mind was somewhere else. LOL! Nick saved the day!

I’m feeling better; Mollie will be busy for the next few days. Maybe I won’t have to just envy Grace much longer.