I have been a wife and mother for over twenty years. Now I am becoming my husband's lover, too.
We owe it all to my fellow bloggers who gave me the courage to come out to my husband as a spanko.
I do feel like this is a New Beginning for us.

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Tuesday, September 08, 2015

Why I plan Candy Crush

I’m basically a lazy person at heart. If the mood to cook, clean, do yard work or anything of that nature comes along I find a quiet place and nap until it goes away.  I have tons of stuff I need to be doing some things like cooking and cleaning that I may never get around to and other things I really want to do and intend to do… but I don’t.

I’m behind on several emails that I really want to answer. I have books I really want to read. I have post I want to write. And most of all I have books I want to write. I need to do all these things, I want to do all these things, so which to I tackle first? Hmm… I think I’ll veg-out on Candy Crush while I’m deciding, four hours later it’s midnight and I stagger off to bed. Very productive.


Also I’m always ‘off’ when Nick and I are ‘off’ and we are a bit. The other night he did a little thing that really makes me mad. Usually I would just shut down and withdraw and spend the next 24 hours nursing my hurt feelings/pouting – whatever. But this time I though no, I’m going to tell him, face to face, that I was upset and wished he wouldn’t do that anymore. Really all I wanted was the smallest, ‘I’m sorry, I didn’t realize I’d done that.’ Instead I got a brief explanation explaining why he was justified. Okay, back to the original plan, withdraw/pout for 24 hours. But I did send him a short email telling him again why I was hurt and that I missed the closeness we have at time, but that once again we’d let it drift away.

I ended it with the hope that we could have more quality alone time next weekend (Mollie was home this weekend) and that I loved him. It didn’t really require a response, but I’d like to know whether he got it or not. Often if he doesn’t check his email for a few days he assumes everything is spam and deletes it.

It’s too minor to bring up again, but I still feel off.

Solution – play Candy Crush.


23 comments:

  1. Hi PK, I'm sorry this happened and that you are feeling off. It's not too minor if you are feeling this way. I hope you are able to resolve it.

    (hugs)
    Roz

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We'll certainly get over it, but it's annoying.

      Delete
  2. PK, Roz is right. You need more than one hug today.

    Emails can be hard. Sometimes the words don't really convey the emotion behind them. As long as Mollie is gone, my advice is lap sitting.

    If I get my feelings hurt, I want to talk, but sometimes if we are face to face, it comes off confrontational. "Can we talk?" My favorite way to spill something important to Sam is to straddle his lap and put my head on his shoulder. Then I can talk to the dining room wall.

    "This is how I feel........." We teach our children to say "I feel........." instead of "You did.......," but we forget to use that ourselves.

    Ella Sending Many Hugs

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    Replies
    1. That sounds wonderful, but it won't happen here. I'll tell you why in an email sometime.

      Delete
  3. Yeah, recognise this in me. At the moment it's not candy crush, but Bubble Witch saga, but the principle is the same. I'm tired of repeating my gripes to him.
    Hope you get that time together that breaks you out of candy crush.
    hugs
    DF

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    Replies
    1. I hope so too, then again, candy crush is so much easier than dealing with feelings.

      Delete
  4. Nap is what I do. Hurt feelings, that is so hard to deal with, especially when they don't see the obvious. You two will get back into the groove. That is what is so special about your relationship. Eventually, out comes the communication and the making up. I am sure that the whole back to school and too much on your plate doesn't help his mood anymore that it does yours. Thank God for teachers.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know we'll make it back to each other - but I wish I knew if he got the email. Getting back in the groove of school does take some getting used to at my age, but I'm getting there. This should be a good year for me.

      Delete
  5. I love taking naps! And I love Candy Crush, but I am sad to tell you that I have been so stuck on a level, that I have lost all wanting to play. Its been forever now since I have. Stupid level 411.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am so embarrassed to say I'm on level 782. That's a heck of a lot of wasted time. I'm pretty good at napping too.

      Delete
  6. Bllimey I wouldn't have played candy crush I would have read my kindle. Oh let me see that is exactly what I have been doing this week as I am in the same situation as you are right now. We have had an awful week and hubby finally apologised today. I have barely spoken a word all week to anyone and am dealing with some major crap in my life, seemingly alone. Life is hard :(
    Hope your week improves PK
    love Jan,xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm so sorry Jan - I hope your week improves and that life in general does. Even little squabbles with our men make such a difference.

      Delete
  7. It's not too minor if you all feeling this way. Hope you get some quality time this weekend.

    Love and hugs,
    Ronnie
    xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I hope we do too Ronnie, we're fine. But I want us to be better.

      Delete
  8. I find Candy Crush is a great outlet also.....hope that by the time you read this things have improved.
    hugs abby

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We're okay - nothing's been said, but we're fine.

      Delete
  9. I used to love Candy Crush but got stuck on a level and gave up. Soda Crush is more doable for me. What I really love is Gummy Drop! I've done all the levels of Restaurant Royale but keep on doing the daily demands.

    Hugs,
    Hermione

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  10. While I used to be addicted to CC, now I only play sporadically. I'm more addicted to Words with Friends.

    Sorry about the disconnect between you and Nick. Sometimes it's not just words but the tone that hurts. I know you'll get through it, but it's miserable in the meantime.

    ReplyDelete
  11. BIG HUGS to you, PK! I'm so sorry that you are going through this little blip. What I am hoping for is that Nick responds to your email. Maybe you can bring him a kinder weapon of arse destruction and just hand it to him. Have you ever tried that? I hope things are better real soon.

    IN the meantime, nap and candy crush- sounds AOK to me. I forget what level I am stuck on in that game. Those chocolate pieces make me crazy- and their blippy/ploppy sound that goes with them! I haven't had time to play that or any in ages. But I sure like it. LOL! Feel good! AMny hugs,

    <3 Katie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Definitely not in the mood to hand him anything. I'm seriously not in the mood. If you do get back to candy crush - always, always turn off the sound!

      Delete
  12. Lazy, yep, me too! :-) Though I have never played candy crush - I watch tv or take a nap when I really can't seem to do anything else. I am sorry that you are feeling off. I so get your frustration, I really do. Sometimes I wish there was a translator to help us communicate in words we each understand...I should email some of the conversations my hubby and I have been having - lacking in all feeling or understanding and ending only in frustration on my part. Not sure he notices. So I guess I am feeling off too...but rather than deal with it I will probably just take another nap or get lost in the story of whatever show I am watching. Big hugs to you.

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  13. Just catching up on everything that's happened whilst I was away. Hope you and Nick have sorted out the problem and things are back to normal. Maybe you could take up the latest craze going on in Australia to relieve your stress. colouring for adults, it is very addictive and relaxing.
    best wishes
    Lindy x

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  14. I am also lazy...

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