Monday, January 16, 2017

About that talk with Nick...

I couldn’t make up my mind what I wanted to say. I mean, it’s been a decade we’ve been working at this, yet so many times it’s just gone. It’s so easy to get busy and let it go out of our lives. Nick is usually will to dole out a spanking because he knows I like it, but he’s never understood discipline as it is in my mind. That’s no fault of his, I don’t understand it either.




I hesitated to go to him for the hundredth time asking and trying to explain again. How to you convey the truth that for a born spanko TTWD is a need and not just a desire? It’s not like food and water where you’ll actually die without it. It’s more like sunshine – you can do without for a long time, but when it’s not in your life you’re not as healthy, you begin to feel dull and listless, your body yearns for it. It that way TTWD is truly a need for me.



The idea of talking with him stayed in my mind, but it’s an easy thing to put off, after all I’d put it off for the first twenty-three years we were married. I didn’t write out what I wanted to say as I usually do, I didn’t ask him to let me know when he had time for a discussion. I just decided, day after day, to talk to him ‘in a few days.’

So I guess you can imagine my surprise when he took my hand Friday morning and said, “I think we need to talk.” as he led me to the bedroom. “Go ahead and take off your clothes, you seem to listen better that way.” And while I was still stunned, he bent me over the bed and began spanking as he talked.

He said he knew it had been a long time since I’d had a real spanking. He’s well aware of how life gets in the way. But he’d picked the one thing in which I need his help more than any other. I don’t want Nick bossing me around, telling me what I can do, or when to do it or how much to spend or anything of that nature. I’m too old to listen about things that don’t really matter to us. But health issues – yes, I need his help, his dominance desperately!

While he spanked – hand spanking, stinging but not harsh – he pointed out that I’d stalled completely on the weight loss the doctor insisted was so important for my overall health and especially my diabetes.  He was right, after being frightened initially a year ago when I was diagnosed I lost fourteen pounds. Then I stopped trying. I haven’t gain those pounds back, but I haven’t lost any more.



Nick then set a goal – a very reasonable and doable goal. There is a firm dead line each month – with possible reminders along the way. But he told me if I just blow it off and he’s not seeing the effort there will be a paddling that’s not the fun, giggling kind we often dream of. He says it will be serious, because the health issue is serious.



*A note for newcomers, Nick is the most reasonable of men. He know that weigh loss often reaches a plateau and stops for a while. But he and I both know that’s not why I stopped losing, I stopped losing because I stopped trying. This also has nothing to do with how I look, this is for my health and nothing else.

Bless him, I hope he’s serious. I need the help I need the atmosphere of TTWD to keep me thinking and trying and being optimistic. I look forward to the short, sweet, stinging spankings that will remind me to pay attention. It feel like the sun is trying to peek out again.

The last things he told me to do that morning before he let me up was to plan on emailing him by Tuesday with ideas I felt would work for me on the weight loss front, things I was planning to do and not do that would jump start me in the right direction. I love it when he insist I email him. I mean, of course I can email him any time – but the idea of being told to email, told to tell him how I’m doing or what I’m thinking, that’s one of the most loving things he can do for me.

So you see I never got around to having that talk with Nick, he had one with me and that's so much better.

Written by PK at 5:30 PM

35 comments

35 Comments:

At 1:29 AM, Blogger an English Rose said...

Aw PK, he has finally got the hang of it! For goodness sake get back on track now, you have a long retirement ahead, you need to be fit to enjoy it. Bless him, I could do with that same sort of help now , might have to show this post to my beloved.....
love Jan, xx

 
At 1:35 AM, Blogger Cat said...

Wow PK! So very proud of Nick...your health is definitely important and so happy he stepped up. I loaded a free app on my phone called Lose It and have lost 25 pounds since last April...Jz is also using it. It is easy to use and helps with reasonable goals. I entered that I wanted to lose 1 pound a week and enter my weight once a week (Sunday morning). Sometimes I have lost a bit more sometimes I have gained a bit but being consistent has helped a lot. I am very visual and I love the charts it shows me. Sending lots of positive energy for you.

Hugs and blessings...Cat

 
At 3:14 AM, Blogger Roz said...

Hi PK, wow,I'm smiling reading this. Good on Nick! Your health is important and I'm so glad Nick is willing to help you with your goals.

I love how you likened the need for ttwd to the need for sunshine. Wonderful analogy. I hope the sun keeps shining for you :)

Hugs
Roz

 
At 3:45 AM, Blogger lindy thomas said...

So happy Nick has stepped up to help you improve your health PK. Don't ignore it as its very important. You want to live a long, healthy retired life and be around when you finally have grandchildren.
I also love your analogy to ttwd being like sunshine. When its not around it feels like the sky is grey.
So get moving girl and eat the right food. We should all encourage each other I reckon as I also need to do this for health reasons.

Hugs Lindy xx

 
At 4:25 AM, Blogger ronnie said...

PK,

Your post had me smiling. We don't need to tell you how important your health is so good for Nick stepping up and will be helping you reach your goal.

Love,
Ronnie
xx

 
At 8:10 AM, Blogger abby said...

See..I told you you would love retirement...Yeah for Nick, also! I need to get back on that diet band wagon also...we can do this.
hugs abby

 
At 9:48 AM, Blogger Ella said...

Oh, Happy Day! I know Nick does not know any of us a bit, but do give him a huge thank you from your friends out in blogland. Reasonable goals and firm consequences will have you smiling as the pounds drop off.

We let things slide over the holidays, and Sam has recently "helped" me get back on track. I was writing a post about it, in fact!

Much Love From Ella

 
At 10:02 AM, Blogger Meredith Malloy said...

PK,
Ttwd is just like sunshine. Oh, yes.......... the very best definition ever. Good for Nick and good for you. So happy for the two of you. PK, you can do this!
Meredith

 
At 10:07 AM, Blogger an English Rose said...

Oh I am going to look for that app!

 
At 12:58 PM, Blogger Laurel said...

This is so positive and a wonderful way to start the year off. Good luck to you on both fronts here, it can be done!

 
At 1:14 PM, Blogger His Mignon said...

That's is just the best ray of sunshine anywhere! My "expectations" are all health related so I do understand where Nick's coming from as my DH is happy to remind me....meet the "expectation" or meet with him😀! You have this and he has you.
Mignon

 
At 5:48 PM, Blogger Rosie Jones said...

PK, I'm so happy for you; you've always said you respond better to the stick than the carrot and now Nick is providing the incentive you need to tackle your weight loss and improve your health. Yay for you both!
I love your sunshine analogy too.
Rosie xx

 
At 7:51 PM, Blogger PK said...

I so hope he's serious. I want to get this done, but I haven't been able to make myself on my own. Having him behind me means everything.

 
At 7:57 PM, Blogger PK said...

Thanks Cat, I'm going to look into that app too. I'm very bad at recording my food. I think that would help.

 
At 7:58 PM, Blogger PK said...

I just want it so bad - and not just the slap on the but but the feeling that we are doing TTWD together. It makes me feel so much closer to Nick.

 
At 8:01 PM, Blogger PK said...

I really do want to be healthy for a long time and I know I can make the changes. I just have to do it.

 
At 8:03 PM, Blogger PK said...

I know, and I have the time now to do things right. Cooking still isn't my strong point, but I can do it. I really wish I like vegetable!

 
At 8:14 PM, Blogger PK said...

I am loving it. I think I would do better at exercise than eating right.

 
At 8:16 PM, Blogger PK said...

The guys never really realize how much we depend on them. It's NOT his responsibility, it's mine. But it's so much easier with his help.

 
At 8:24 PM, Blogger PK said...

It sure is true for me. And I do like it when the sun comes out.

 
At 8:26 PM, Blogger PK said...

Thanks! I appreciate the luck.

 
At 8:28 PM, Blogger PK said...

"meet the "expectation" or meet with him", that's a good way to put it! I hope we're all getting out sunshine!

 
At 8:38 PM, Blogger PK said...

It's so true, the carrot never did a things for me. Maybe we can get some reminders sprinkled in though out the month.

 
At 7:34 AM, Blogger Minelle Labraun said...

Nick is such a wonderful man. He really knows what makes you tick!
I too am in need of getting back on the healthy bandwagon! Hope I can be inspired!

 
At 10:10 AM, Blogger Katie said...

PK, I think this is wonderful! :) Nick sure surprised you, and his love for you is so evident here! Nick knows what you need, what you'd like, and wants you healthy! We all do! You can do it, and while you are, you have a whole bunch of us cheerleaders across the globe! I'm happy for you both!

I love how you referenced sunshine here too! What a great way to think about spanking needs! Many hugs and love,

<3 Katie

 
At 8:43 PM, Blogger PK said...

I hope - and my butt hopes - we can be an inspiration for you.

 
At 8:49 PM, Blogger PK said...

He really did surprise me. Now I hope I can surprise him with how well I do.

 
At 11:04 AM, Blogger Terpsichore said...

Glad he had a talk with you. What a nice surprise. I love your description of the likeness of the need for spanking to that of sunshine. beautiful words that couldn't be more true. :-) Hugs

 
At 5:34 PM, Anonymous farmmom said...

Thanks for the newcomer note. I'm/we're just putting our toes in at present. But I can attest to the Lose It app, I lost 40lbs last year.

 
At 5:41 PM, Blogger Mobby said...

Dear PK, please allow me to be a little provocative. I am curious. What if you actually attain your goal. There will bo no spanking. And what if, theoretically, you remove all your flaws for which you are spanked... All spankings will be over. You like the spanking and you need it. It's rather a prize for you than a punishment. I am with you on it bacuase I like giving it very much as well and I am most excited when my girl wants it needs needs it. But for me it is a very poor motivator - or punishment - because there is pleasure coming with it, so it's no deterrent all, is it? That is why I have no believe in punishment spanking for anyone who likes spanking because, it's no punishment whatsoever. To put it most illustratively, I would be most opposed to giving a spanking to a womean for a speeding ticket because I think I might seriously put in danger her health or life.

 
At 6:12 PM, Blogger PK said...

Mobby, You have brought up some great points here and I would like to give you my thoughts on what you've said. Your question was raised by Nick at the beginning. I want to do a post on this tomorrow or the next day. Please come back.

 
At 6:12 PM, Blogger PK said...

We both knowing that longing for the sunshine.

 
At 6:15 PM, Blogger PK said...

So glad you stopped by Farmmom. I love talking with newcomers. I hope your journey into TTWD will bring you both joy. Sounds like I need that app. I trust my readers opinions. Please come by any time and my email is elisspeaks@yahoo.com.

 
At 2:29 PM, Blogger Mobby said...

Oh, I am back, not about to leave, and I am curious about your thoughts. This is a topic that has intrigued me for a long time.

btw, I am reading my own post and getting ashamed at the grammar mistakes I left in it. What does it call for? ;) But, I can be excused, it was well past midnight when I was writing that :)

 
At 4:04 PM, Blogger PK said...

Mobby, the post will be up at midnight - no spanking needed for a few grammatical errors (though if you're feeling guilty, feel free to ask your lady for a few swats.)

 

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