Hey everyone! I had a good weekend. We got to go see LJ in a play. We spent the night with my sister and Mollie got to stay in the dorm with her cousin – after going to her first ‘college party’. I have great faith in Mollie not to be stupid and she didn’t let me down. I asked her if she talked to many people and she said no, but that she sure did a lot of listening! I think she had a really good time.
Collin was there to see the play too and then we took everyone out for breakfast Sunday morning. When we go to see him in a play breakfast is really the only time we get to spend with him. His classes are over and only a few exams remain. Apparently when you are a theater major exams aren’t a big deal. He didn’t get into the stage company he was hoping for this summer. As you might imagine hard times are hurting the Arts in a big way. Troupes are cutting down the number of plays they are doing and going for smaller casts. I am hoping he can get some kind of jobs for some hours this summer.
Okay that’s it for the kids update, on to the spanking portion of the blog.
We’re not doing so great on that front. No problems, nothing to complain about. I have had a few short spankings. And we have found time for some great lovemaking. But, but…
I read Bonnie’s brunch question for this Sunday, it was
What do you and your partner do to keep alive your interest in spanking?
I really liked the question. I read some of the answers and many were saying that as a couple of hard wired spankos it really wasn’t a problem keeping interest alive. But what do you do when you have a mixed marriage – spanko/vanilla?
I have no doubt that Nick enjoys spanking me occasionally. It can lead to wonderful things that are probably more fun for him that the spankings themselves, which satisfies many of my needs. But the deeper needs still are still there.
It’s like if after 25 years of marriage Nick came to me and said “I have always wanted to climb mountains. I’ve never told you before but sometimes it’s all I can think about. Will you do it with me?” My answer is “Sure, why didn’t you tell me. Let’s go.”
So we head to the mountains and we walk across mountain meadows. We climb some steep paths, limb on some rock to see the view and we both enjoy it. But then Nick says “This is great but what I really meant was MOUNTAIN CLIMBING!” I then I find he wants to be scaling sheer cliffs, hanging on by his finger tips and ropes and such. Grabbing oxygen tanks and heading to Everest. And I have to tell him – nope, sorry that is not for me. I just can’t go there with you. This is the way I think Nick feels about the whole ‘I want to be spanked’ revelation.
This is not a post to complain about Nick, I think Nick is doing all he knows to do. But some things are just not in him to give. Giving true discipline will never be part of his make up. We are neither one all that great at roll playing either. That will always be a need in my head but I don’t think it will be fulfilled because I don’t even know how to explain what I need.
I know now I don’t want Nick ordering me around the moment I walk in the door. I don’t want him telling me when I can and can’t spend money, what I should wear, when I can leave the house. Some love that kind of control and I am happy for them when they find it, but it’s not right for Nick and me.
So what am I trying to say to him? “Don’t boss me around or tell me what to do but please dominate me!” LOL!! No wonder men can get so confused!
I do know I want to be dominated in the bed room! I love it when he tells me to get into a certain position, when he tells me to put on the blindfold, when he tells me to be still. I like to be treated like a possession in the bedroom. I like being ordered around and spanked when I resist or don’t react quickly enough. I love being tied up – and I mean for real (at least for a short time) where I really can’t move around and I can pull against the restraints and find them unyielding. I want to be able to say ‘No, stop’, ‘Let me go’, ‘Please, no more’ and have him ignore me!!
I wish Nick understood the value of words and tone to a spanko. Nick is the kindest of men and even when he is ordering me around that comes through. Only on very few occasions will he truly use his dominate look and voice. And Nick honey, in case you don’t know the voice and look I’m talking about, it’s what you use whenever I talk about getting another kitten. LOL! – he is all dom then! By word, tone and stance there is no doubt when he says ‘We do not need kitten’ that he means it!! But if I actually brought one home he would be pissed – but spanking me for defying him would never occur to him.
Ahhh… well. These are just random thought running through my head. I thought I’d try to get some of them down. Check in on the diet update this week. I’ll probably have more.