I have been a wife and mother for over twenty years. Now I am becoming my husband's lover, too.
We owe it all to my fellow bloggers who gave me the courage to come out to my husband as a spanko.
I do feel like this is a New Beginning for us.

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Monday, December 06, 2010

Good news or bad news

I had my weigh in Friday morning – did everything I could the week before in the hopes of losing that pound. I ate right; I either went to the gym or played on the wii every day. I was very careful about snacks at school and didn’t have any soft drinks except for diet. Shoot I even gave blood the evening before the weigh in. Did I make it?? You better believe it. I was down 1.4 pounds! Alright, fine start, but let’s see how it goes. I’m not trying to lose a ton this month but Nick says I should be working to maintain this weight through the end of January. That sure would be nice. Nick still seems involved, he send me an email mid –week offering to ‘tawse’ me a line if I needed it. LOL, nothing like a funny spanker.

But now I need to know what in the world is wrong with me. Nick and I had some alone time last week and we put it to very good use. But as he tried a little spanking as a warm up, it just hurt like hell, and he was taking it very easy. What is going on with me? Nick teased me some, calling me a wimp. He’s right but why? It’s not like I have my cycle anymore so it’s not that. There is no reason for the woman who has been a lifelong spanko, who has bought every spanking toy she could get her hands on, who has practically begged her husband to spank longer and harder to suddenly not want to be spanked AT ALL! I guess this is going to be one more thing for me to think about. It’s not like its causing a problem or anything but I don’t like it at all. It still keeps me from feeling like me. Of course it does make me work harder on the ‘healthy living’ stuff because Nick says that spanking is still on the table whether I like it or not. Now what I need to know is whether that’s the good news or the bad news.

8 comments:

  1. PK, I have no advice, not come across this problem before.
    I hope that it's temporary.
    Love abd warm hugs,
    Paul.

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  2. SugarAnne5:47 AM

    Well done on the weight loss, PK. It's so cool that Nick is willing to help you through the struggle. He seems like a very wise man.

    I wouldn't worry about your experiencing more pain. I've been told that our tolorance for pain will go up and down with changes in body chemistry. Chances are 30 days from now he'll be able to "tawse" you that line, and you'll probably giggle.

    So, for now, the threat of a spanking makes your resolve a little stronger. That's good news. Hang in there.

    SugarAnne

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  3. I think it's nature way of telling you to leave off for a while. It will come back but it should be natural not an obsession. Do other things as well. Build a more rounded sex life. Obsessions can kill off things. Spanking should be an addition not the main thing. it can be a thing that can get you ready for other things.

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  4. sweetsassyT8:32 AM

    Our bodies are always changing, the 'change' of life is only one of them. Your body chemistry is effecting the sensitivity of your skin, but you had good advice on that. I was wondering if you have seen or heard of Livestrong. It's Lance Armstrong's site. It's free. You can create an account. Trace food, log your favorite meals, enter exercise, etc. They have an app as well. The best thing I have found is that I'm not struggling to find a nutritional count. Let's say I want a small bowl of fruit. There is something in there that will match it. It's much easier than any other site I have looked at, and it's free. The other thing I wanted to make you aware of is a test dietitians can do to measure your metabolism rate. It's $50, and you breath into a machine for 10 minutes. That's it. I was told there is no 'good or bad rate' until they read mine. Should have seen this woman's face! I literally could be fed through a tube and not lose .25 pound a week. I had destroyed my metabolism. So the more I exercised, the more it shut down. It was convinced we were in starvation mode, and it shut down. I had to INCREASE my intake by 500 calories and add a weight strengthening exercise, not cardio to kick it back in line. Muscle and food feed the machine that is your body and everything works better. Goo luck to you! Happy Holidays!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Paul,
    I hope it's temporary too. I don't like it at all.

    Thanks SugarAnne,
    It felt good to lose even a little. It's hard to get back into it. Cold weather doesn't make me want to get out of my recliner and out from under my blanket.

    I hope you're right about the pain tolerance thing.

    Blondie,
    You may have a point. I have no problem with a more well rounded sex life but for over 40 years that where my fantasy life took me. I’m not exactly where else to go.

    SweetsassyT,
    Thanks for the site information. I will look at it. I know one of my biggest problems to weight loss and I’ll discuss it in a post sometime. It has been a while since I did any weight training. I do know that you need muscle to lose weight. I guess I need to start back.

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  6. Great news on the weight loss PK, really good.

    If you haven't had any real spankings in a while of course it hurts, happens to all of us so don't worry.

    Love,
    Ronnie
    xx

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  7. Anonymous7:29 AM

    Like anything in a relationship, 90 percent is mental. You have said in your blog that mentally your not "in the right place". While a part of you still yearns and wants to be spanked another part of you is not as into it. Whether stress, doubts, diminished expectations. whatever. Give it time you have a loving attentive husband, one way or another you two will work this out to a mutual resolve.

    Hugs C

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  8. Ronnie,
    I guess you're right. There has been no real spanking and not much playing lately. Just the usual reasons, tired, lazy but at least we are getting along well. That counts the most.

    C,
    You hit the nail on the head. I know that mentally I am not in the right place. I guess my biggest fear is that i will never get it back. I just don't know.

    ReplyDelete