tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31522777.post116325550461832888..comments2024-03-26T18:59:25.722-04:00Comments on New Beginnings: The Carrot or the StickPKhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02050453501744475319noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31522777.post-1163380281505226202006-11-12T20:11:00.000-05:002006-11-12T20:11:00.000-05:00Hiya PK,I, too, respond much better to the threat ...Hiya PK,<BR/><BR/>I, too, respond much better to the threat of punishment than the promise of reward (although I love the surprise of an unexpected reward!) When I get out of line, the Coach has one phrase that seems to straighten me out quickly "Suzy, do you want to go to bed with a red bottom tonight?". Yikes! and Yowza! It works for me every time on so many levels!<BR/><BR/>Communication about these things is so important, and it seems that you two have that. How great that he is participating on your blog now, so you have one more way of communicating. <BR/><BR/>Good post, PK!<BR/><BR/>*hugs* SuzyAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31522777.post-1163361835960082232006-11-12T15:03:00.000-05:002006-11-12T15:03:00.000-05:00Todd and Suzy,I like the way you guys are doing yo...Todd and Suzy,<BR/>I like the way you guys are doing your weight program. I wish we had better scales, since it's my butt on the line. But so far so good. I hope to have more time for the gym this week. So far he hasn't seemed to mind me telling him what I think I need.<BR/><BR/>Paul, how did Mel react if you withheld a spanking. Did she try to behave to get back in your good graces or did she brat until you changed your mind??<BR/><BR/>Theresa,<BR/>Well.... It's been a good day. I do like being able to tell him what I like. And I also often ask him to tell me thing he thinks about and what he would like from me.<BR/><BR/>Tig,<BR/>You name has already come up in one discussion this morning! I love him jumping in too, but I definitely have a mild panic attack every time I see his name here!<BR/><BR/>We shall see.<BR/><BR/>ElisPKhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02050453501744475319noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31522777.post-1163344893708890382006-11-12T10:21:00.000-05:002006-11-12T10:21:00.000-05:00Yeah, OK, Theresa (and PK), I like hearing myself ...Yeah, OK, Theresa (and PK), I like hearing myself talk... NOT!!!!!<BR/><BR/>Blogger needed whacked! And I smacked it good! Go, me!<BR/><BR/>I love Nick's remarks the very best and we shall all wait somewhat impatiently to see how this plays out... he knows you better than anyone and I LOVE that he is jumping into the waters here now...<BR/><BR/>Love you,<BR/>TiggsTiggshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13547847355311812871noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31522777.post-1163344301688225422006-11-12T10:11:00.000-05:002006-11-12T10:11:00.000-05:00OK PK you asked for it sounds like you got it!What...OK PK you asked for it sounds like you got it!<BR/><BR/>What's with Tiggr this morning. Is she trying to make a point? Three times!<BR/><BR/>To me the threats and the spanko talk is 90% of the fun. Like you said you need privacy for a spanking. But you can have spanko talk and threats in the car, on the phone, at Walmart, and even in the park. <BR/><BR/>I told Will the other night and again this morning. My bottom needs lots of attention. I need you to pat, rub, smack, pinch all the time. And these things can also be done private and public.<BR/><BR/>I don't think I am topping, just telling him what I want. Right?<BR/><BR/>Good one PK!<BR/><BR/>Hugs<BR/>TheresaTheresahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04955725003787142974noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31522777.post-1163297975065723632006-11-11T21:19:00.000-05:002006-11-11T21:19:00.000-05:00The comments of Tiggr an Todd and Suzy are very we...The comments of Tiggr an Todd and Suzy are very well said. Remember adding the carrot does not mean the stick has been put aside. You can choose which to focus on. Both are there. I still expect you to be at or better than the goal we have ageed upon. So far you have managed to do so. It looks like you need to bear down on food choice and excercise to remain successful. If not, watch out.<BR/>Love,<BR/>NickAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31522777.post-1163287072677431392006-11-11T18:17:00.000-05:002006-11-11T18:17:00.000-05:00Elis dear girl. I absolutely agree with what a.s.s...Elis dear girl. I absolutely agree with what a.s.s say. <BR/>I was H o H and the Dom, but we talked, then I made the decision, but I knew exactly what Mel needed and felt and likewise Mel knew my needs and wants. Mel needed a level of spanking that was quite high, so saying that I would withhold a spanking worked very well.<BR/>Warm hugs,<BR/>Paul.Paulhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03790580459962602757noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31522777.post-1163278911966166832006-11-11T16:01:00.000-05:002006-11-11T16:01:00.000-05:00First of all, the carrot on a stick... what a grea...First of all, the carrot on a stick... what a great picture! We're stealing that!!<BR/><BR/>Understand what you're saying. Suzy is the same way. Working towards a reward, isn't as easy as working away from the possible punishment. It's too easy for her to rationalize away the reward. 'I can go without that' kind of thing.<BR/><BR/>So, a system with just rewards wouldn't work very well. We do find though, that it's a nice *bonus* to go with the punishment element that dominates our diet agreement. Do you think it would be easier if you looked at it that way? The "carrot" is just a bonus, one that carries only a fraction what the "stick" side does?<BR/><BR/>The LACK of receiving a punishment... if it is a true punishment... is a type of reward, btw.<BR/><BR/>As for the 'topping' thing, everyone has a different view on this. Our opinion is, it makes perfect sense to fully participate in the building of a spanking related arrangement. What are spankable offenses, how possible rewards will work and so on (even if the deal made is, one person makes all the decisions).<BR/><BR/>Seems quite reasonable to explain what you want and need... what works for you. Of course, he has his wants and needs too. Shouldn't ever be a reason why a couple can't honestly express their desires with each other... and work towards something that makes both happy.<BR/><BR/>~Todd & SuzyAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31522777.post-1163263875267410612006-11-11T11:51:00.000-05:002006-11-11T11:51:00.000-05:00Oh PK, I'm with you all the way here, totally and ...Oh PK, I'm with you all the way here, totally and completely. I, too, respond ever so much better, quicker and happier to sticks than rewards and every word of what you've said rings true... about the threats as well... I nearly wet myself with excitement and I get all fluttery when Dante does that.<BR/><BR/>BUT, all of that aside, the trouble is that this puts WAY more pressure and expectation on your man (my man, too, which is why much of this stopped months ago). And I do disagree with one thing... you ARE topping from the bottom with this, even if it doesn't seem that way.<BR/><BR/>He's trying to do it his way and you want to change it... I agree with you, mind you, and also respond much better to "our" way, but that's not the point from where Nick is standing...<BR/><BR/>This needs more thought than I can offer here so I'll nag you by email (well, not immediately but soon)... but again let me say that I absolutely agree and I, too, am a stick/punishment kinda gal rather than a carrot/reward type. So I know the frustration and longing you're feeling all too well....<BR/><BR/>Love you!Tiggshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13547847355311812871noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31522777.post-1163263794164446112006-11-11T11:49:00.000-05:002006-11-11T11:49:00.000-05:00Oh PK, I'm with you all the way here, totally and ...Oh PK, I'm with you all the way here, totally and completely. I, too, respond ever so much better, quicker and happier to sticks than rewards and every word of what you've said rings true... about the threats as well... I nearly wet myself with excitement and I get all fluttery when Dante does that.<BR/><BR/>BUT, all of that aside, the trouble is that this puts WAY more pressure and expectation on your man (my man, too, which is why much of this stopped months ago). And I do disagree with one thing... you ARE topping from the bottom with this, even if it doesn't seem that way.<BR/><BR/>He's trying to do it his way and you want to change it... I agree with you, mind you, and also respond much better to "our" way, but that's not the point from where Nick is standing...<BR/><BR/>This needs more thought than I can offer here so I'll nag you by email (well, not immediately but soon)... but again let me say that I absolutely agree and I, too, am a stick/punishment kinda gal rather than a carrot/reward type. So I know the frustration and longing you're feeling all too well....<BR/><BR/>Love you!Tiggshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13547847355311812871noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31522777.post-1163263507178006742006-11-11T11:45:00.000-05:002006-11-11T11:45:00.000-05:00Oh PK, I'm with you all the way here, totally and ...Oh PK, I'm with you all the way here, totally and completely. I, too, respond ever so much better, quicker and happier to sticks than rewards and every word of what you've said rings true... about the threats as well... I nearly wet myself with excitement and I get all fluttery when Dante does that.<BR/><BR/>BUT, all of that aside, the trouble is that this puts WAY more pressure and expectation on your man (my man, too, which is why much of this stopped months ago). And I do disagree with one thing... you ARE topping from the bottom with this, even if it doesn't seem that way.<BR/><BR/>He's trying to do it his way and you want to change it... I agree with you, mind you, and also respond much better to "our" way, but that's not the point from where Nick is standing...<BR/><BR/>This needs more thought than I can offer here so I'll nag you by email (well, not immediately but soon)... but again let me say that I absolutely agree and I, too, am a stick/punishment kinda gal rather than a carrot/reward type. So I know the frustration and longing you're feeling all too well....<BR/><BR/>Love you!Tiggshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13547847355311812871noreply@blogger.com